[fade in - two men standing around a bar in Small Town, USA]
Greg: Dad, there's some big city reporter been snooping around.
Charlie: Well, what's he want, son?
Greg: He's asking questions about Todd Boeckman. Thinks that he was "threw under the bus", whatever that means.
Charlie: Means that he was benched, son.
Greg: Oh.... Well, shouldn't he've been benched after that USC game?
Charlie: Yes, son, but that's beside the point. Todd's a local boy....
Greg: Oh, now I get it ... I think.
[momentary silence - both appear lost in thought]
Greg: Dad, if we rip on Coach Tressel, you think we'll get our names in the paper?
Charlie: Yep. Sure do.
Greg: Think they'll mention my restaurant and bar?
Charlie: Yep. And my grocery store, too.
Greg: Well, shucks! That's free advertising, pops!
Charlie: Sure is, son ... and in the big city paper, nonetheless.
Greg: And on the internets!
Charlie: Yep. On the internets, too....
[pause - look at each other]
In unison: COACH TRESSEL SUCKS!
[fade out]
[end of Act I, Scene 2]