• Follow us on Twitter @buckeyeplanet and @bp_recruiting, like us on Facebook! Enjoy a post or article, recommend it to others! BP is only as strong as its community, and we only promote by word of mouth, so share away!
  • Consider registering! Fewer and higher quality ads, no emails you don't want, access to all the forums, download game torrents, private messages, polls, Sportsbook, etc. Even if you just want to lurk, there are a lot of good reasons to register!

NoSuch Dame LB Manti "Snugglebunny" Te'o (official imaginary thread)

Jump to latest Follow Reply
Sort by date Sort by votes
Nutriaitch;2293299; said:
i doubt that was his motivation, just a by product.

probably went something like this.

Teo is having gay buttsex with the Tuiasospo guy, but can't come clean on that.
Needs a way to explain the all night phone calls to California, parents not meeting his significant other, etc.

BOOM, make up a girlfriend story.

works for a while until mom and dad decide they need to meet this girl if they still together this long. must be serious, she could become their daughter in law.

need to buy some time somehow....hmmmm.

CAR WRECK!

[Mark May], that's only temporary. they want to meet her at a game this year. how can we prolong this a bit?

um leukemia! yeah, leukemia. no way they expect a cancer patient to fly across country to meet us. this will definitely buy more time for us to figure a way out of this mess.

aww crap. she can't have leukemia. mom and pop are going to constantly ask questions, how can we keep this up?

dude, we gotta kill her off. people will feel sorry for you at 1st, but it's football season. no one is ever going to even think about her again in a week or so.

what about the funeral? won't you be expected to go away for a day or two for a funeral?

make it on gameday. that way they know I can't leave.

sweet! this is gonna work.


unfortunately, like all tall tales, it kept growing.
the media picked it up, ran with it, turned it into a feel good story, jammed it down our throats, used it to perk up his Heisman status, etc.

Te'o had no choice but to roll with it.
It was too big to back down. He had to hope the story would just fade away once he got through the season.

OOOOOPS!
busted.
Click to expand...

I know hindsight is 20-20 but wouldn't been simplier to tell them we broke up.. Teo you dumba$$...:stupid:
 
Upvote 0
Hodgepodge;2293290; said:
Holy [Mark May]..... I need to be the MaxBuck-style contrarian on this.

I'm not saying I buy into what Te'o and Notre Dame are saying, but I'm not about to discount it either. There are lots of unanswered questions, but I think it's a lot more realistic that he was duped and then embellished his relationship with her rather than developing a plot whereby he sucks up to Heisman voters with a sob story.

If you take what Te'o and ND are saying at face value, he was in a long-term relationship with a (alleged) woman that he had never met. OK, so if the story broke that she died and you were being asked questions about how well you knew her, would you come clean and say that she was an on-line girlfriend? I think most people would throw in various addenda about having met, talked on the phone, etc. to make it sound less...pathetic.

Don't get me wrong, I loathe everything about Notre Dame - the conceit, the arrogance, the vastly overrated academics - but I'm willing to wait this one out before accepting that Te'o came up with such a devious and warped plan to get a Heisman.

Anyway, back to your skewering of him and Notre Dame. My agnosticism on this issue aside, it's [censored]ing hilarious.
Click to expand...

Occam's Razor.
 
Upvote 0
teo_zps482623e2.jpg


Not staggering numbers, but thought it was funny.

The Irish website I go to has 1830 in the thread with 1714 guests and the most traffic in it's history. Kind of funny considering Notre Dame just came off their first unbeaten regular season since '88 and didn't get those numbers. It takes an imaginary girlfriend to stir things up.
 
Upvote 0
Hodgepodge;2293290; said:
Holy shit..... I need to be the MaxBuck-style contrarian on this.

I'm not saying I buy into what Te'o and Notre Dame are saying, but I'm not about to discount it either. There are lots of unanswered questions, but I think it's a lot more realistic that he was duped and then embellished his relationship with her rather than developing a plot whereby he sucks up to Heisman voters with a sob story.

If you take what Te'o and ND are saying at face value, he was in a long-term relationship with a (alleged) woman that he had never met. OK, so if the story broke that she died and you were being asked questions about how well you knew her, would you come clean and say that she was an on-line girlfriend? I think most people would throw in various addenda about having met, talked on the phone, etc. to make it sound less...pathetic.

Don't get me wrong, I loathe everything about Notre Dame - the conceit, the arrogance, the vastly overrated academics - but I'm willing to wait this one out before accepting that Te'o came up with such a devious and warped plan to get a Heisman.

Anyway, back to your skewering of him and Notre Dame. My agnosticism on this issue aside, it's fucking hilarious.
Click to expand...

I agree. I haven't seen a more believable repentance since....

1700961_o.gif
 
Upvote 0
For anyone that saw the presser, did anyone ask why he lied about meeting her at Stanford, flying her to Hawaii, his brother being at her side when she passed, her brother calling and telling him she died, etc?

Am curious to hear how they spun that....
 
Upvote 0
billmac91;2293320; said:
For anyone that saw the presser, did anyone ask why he lied about meeting her at Stanford, flying her to Hawaii, his brother being at her side when she passed, her brother calling and telling him she died, etc?

Am curious to hear how they spun that....
Click to expand...

They said you would have to ask Te'o about those details.

But to the topic of direct lies that Notre Dame obviously told.

During the press conference he specifically said that they had not contacted authorities about the matter and left it up to the family, who apparently hired a private investigator who's identity they did not disclose.

In the statement they released, they said:

While the proper authorities will continue to investigate this troubling matter
Click to expand...

You mean the proper authorities that no one reported anything to?
 
Upvote 0
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top