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The Legend of Troy Smith

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The San Andreas Fault isn't the result of geographical movement of the earth- Troy Smith overthrew a receiver once and the ball landed in California, cracking the earth like an eggshell.



Edit- this is one of the BEST THREADS EVER! :slappy: :slappy: :slappy: :slappy: :slappy:
 
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Troy Smith is sixteen feet tall and feeds the poor. His tears are worth more than gold, and he claps his hands for thunder. He routinely saves the earth's population by throwing footballs at incoming meteors, thereby stopping their destructive power.

He enjoys ogling women.
 
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To the tune of "I'm Comin'", by Will Smith​

Feel the earth tremble
See the skies turn red
Eclipse with shootin' stars
- you turn your head
Volcanoes eruptin'
Quake in the Rift
It's not the second coming of Christ
It's the first of Troy Smith

They say if you damn up the Nile
it would throw off the rotation of the Earth...
Well messin' with Troy is worse
Feel the rain,
button up your overcoat
Watch the Glenville bad boy go, quote, "for broke"

Y'all want the best?
Well Troy's right here
Y' lookin' for competition
Ain't no one near

The D'Line hissin'
Go for Troy and missin'
His heavenly flows put DC's in Hell's Kitchen

...and he's so, he's so hot
HOT, y'all burnin' up HOT
Troy steps in
It's like the weddin'
between Hope and Armageddon
The Buckeye Moses to where we're headin' y'all

Troy's Comin'
Troy's Comin'
They can't stop him - They can't STOP him
Troy's Comin'
Troy's Comin'
Can't hold him back

uh-uh
Troy's Comin'
Troy's Comin'
They can't stop him - They can't STOP him
Troy's Comin'
Troy's Comin'



When Troy was born
there was a rainbow formed with no sun
ROYGBIV markin' the path for the chosen one
A prophet, Jim Tressel sold Troy upon the dream,
"Champions never put themselves before the team"

So from TD to NC - MVP to Heisman
His life's stats'll make Jordon's six-string seem common

Y'all Hate
Troy Retaliates
Just by bein' great
Troy Smith's the enemy of your mental state

With the same move he used to burn Burgess in the Battle
He'll screw you up and make you say "I don't wanna battle"

MVP - MNC mad respect
Black Stealth Bomb-a-rama
Radar can't detect that

Troy's Comin'
Is what I scream
But that's a TEAM
Armed with discipline
Faith and a dream

And when the smoke clears
after life's ups and downs
See who stands
and gives the Bucks another Crown

What?

Troy's Comin'
Troy's Comin'
They can't stop him - They can't STOP him
Troy's Comin'
Troy's Comin'
You can't hold him back

uh-uh
Troy's Comin'
Troy's Comin'
They can't stop him - They can't STOP him
Troy's Comin'
Troy's Comin'

Batten Down the Hatches
and Latch the Doors
You wanna try to match
Troy's wits wit' yours?
Three hits he hits you
You hit the floor
His Heisman's the 3rd hit
That's for sure

Feet Quick
Reminiscent of a Fast Ferrari
He's like a cheetah huntin'
Out on the Kalahari

He's got x-ray vision
through all in his way
No plan B it distracts from plan A

Defense splittin' in half
earthquake style
Evacuate the premises
Your hard-core nemesis
He'll NEVER miss
His reads - never flawed
Bustin' it just the way it's drawn upon the board

Quest for the Crown
His best weapon - intuition
His future position
determined by past decision

So female Clinton
He's thinkin' about runnin'
Maybe not this time but trust this...

Troy's Comin'
Troy's Comin'
They can't stop him - They can't STOP him
Troy's Comin'
Troy's Comin'
You can't hold him back

uh-uh
Troy's Comin'
Troy's Comin'
They can't stop him - They can't STOP him
Troy's Comin'
Troy's Comin'
You can't hold him back

uh-uh
Troy's Comin'
Troy's Comin'
They can't stop him - They can't STOP him
Troy's Comin'
Troy's Comin'
You can't hold him back




​
 
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Troy Smith throws the ball so hard that fans of all teams are hoping Ohio State wins the national championship this year, even methomps.

The fear is that Ohio State will get to the Rose Bowl and a receiver might drop a Troy Smith pass, thereby setting off the worst earthquake ever witnessed in California and forever altering the San Andreas fault--which would then be called anything but the Troy Smith's fault.

The thought of Pete Carroll floating on a blonde with implants for three days waiting to be rescued is more than Southern Cal fans can handle.
 
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