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Parker Fleming (Official Thread)

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OPENER | THE SCORN IDENTITY​

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Ohio State Special Teams Coordinator Parker Fleming watches a replay during the Western Kentucky game. © Adam Cairns/Columbus Dispatch / USA TODAY NETWORK
Brian Ferentz makes $850,000 to run Iowa's offense. Iowa currently ranks 133rd in total offense in the FBS. You know how many FBS teams there are in total? Not 134.

His dad is Iowa's head coach - yeah we discussed this last year when the Hawkeyes came to town. Brian took the heckled route into the one percenter's club for lofty household income, as the whole college football-loving country is fixated on how dismal and unaccountable his results are. He isn't allowed to be rich quietly.

But just imagine having the chutzpa to forfeit a few dollars in exchange for avoiding all that pesky scrutiny. Would you accept a modest $500,000 salary in exchange for no nepotism jokes or accountability? Of course you would. No shame in being a two percenter.

And that's the Parker Fleming gambit - he is Ohio State's special teams coordinator. If you're a casual fan, you might be seeing that name for the first time. Parker has the best job in Ohio, and there's no close second.

We're simply not accustomed to seeing the words Ohio State Special Teams Coordinator because it's considered luxury headcount. Most teams don't have that FTE in their coaching org charts. But when a program invests in one, it creates accountability and expectations. Theoretically, anyway.

FLEMING OCCUPIES SALARY AND PRECIOUS COORDINATOR HEADCOUNT WHILE DELIVERING A PERSISTENT LIABILITY WHERE NONE PREVIOUSLY EXISTED. LIKE HIRING A MAID ONLY TO SEE YOUR HOUSE GET DIRTIER.



If it's okay to pin the defense on Jim Knowles and the offense on Ryan Day and Brian Hartline, it's perfectly acceptable to pin special teams performance on the guy who runs it.

That means when Emeka Egbuka fields a punt inside the Ohio State 10-yard line while running toward his own endzone, that's on Fleming. When a fake punt fails basic execution against Michigan, Fleming again. When the same fake punt put 12 men on the field against Georgia, 100% Fleming. (how was that even possible?)

But that's the gambit - there have been as many consequences as there have been improvements. Here's the sneaky thing about missing a kick or borking a punt return: you don't need to pay a full-time coach for either of those things. It's college football, a mystical land where #collegekickers flourish.

If you're going to spend headcount on this, special teams performance had better be fucking excellent. That's not how anyone could objectively describe the Buckeyes' special teams.

So when a 2-point conversion resulted in a delay of game penalty last season against Penn State, that was on Fleming. When a second 2-point conversion resulted in a delay of game penalty last season in the same game, that was also on Fleming. Short, terrible punts, missed field goals - including the one that missed by the width of the goal posts to end 2022 are on Fleming. Penalties on top of penalties on special teams - guess who should answer for that.

Prior to Fleming, Matt Barnes coached safeties and linebackers with special teams as an added task. Prior to him, Kerry Coombs looked after that unit. Urban Meyer's first staff had no one with special teams duties. He took that on himself.

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THE SITUATIONAL: Be Cool

Penn State brings a star Ohio prep quarterback to Columbus to face the Buckeyes and their Philadelphia Catholic League legend QB...wait what's going on here?
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Recently thought of this. Day went out and got a “HC of the defense” in Knowles. So he doesn’t have to worry about the defense. I’m guessing he hired Parker Fleming because he does’t want to think about special teams either.
 
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