This is the guy that Michigan should have hired in 2007.
Let's take a look at the RichRod timeline....
1. 2007: Michigan is a year removed from their first serious national championship run in a decade. They have an uber-talented offense, but start slow, lose interest, tank The Game. They somehow manage to rebound and beat Tebow and end their season on a high note. Lloyd goes out a winner, everyone feels good, a new era of Michigan football is about to begin!
2. Even after graduations/early entries (Henne, Hart, Long, Manningham, Arrington, etc.), Michigan still has a lot of talent, plus a franchise quarterback (Mallett) waiting in the wings.
3. Instead of bringing in a Michigan Man, someone like Hoke who will take the solid base he inherits and make a few tweaks, the Michigan "brain trust" outsmart themselves and steal RichRod away from West Virginia.
4. Besides being the obvious "cultural" misfit (paper shredder, snake oil salesman, wizard hat, hilljack, etc.), RichRod decides to tear down the program and rebuld it in his own image (spread, slot dots, 3-3-5, etc.).
5. UM fans go crazy: "ZOMG!!1!! The SPREAD!!11!!! We'll average 50 points per game! He was unstoppable at WVU, he'll be even more unstoppable with all of Michigan's talent! LOL Suckeyes!!!!"
6. Ohio State fans laugh their asses off: "He'll scare off all the existing talent. He'll recruit Big East caliber players who can't read. He'll ignore the defensive side of the ball. He'll run the spread and only the spread regardless of his team's abilities. He'll get you put on probation. He'll ruin your program. Nice hire scUM! LOL"
7. Michigan fan responds: "You're just afraid of us!! You can't stop the SPREAD!! 41-14!! BARWIS!!!!1!!!111!!!!!!!!"
8. 2008: Michigan endures its worst year in history of storied program. Mass defections of top talent, including franchise QB and All Big Ten OG. 3-9. Holy Toledo! Loss to Michigan State. Blown out by Ohio State. RichRod signs a quarterback with jazz hands and a safety without a high school diploma.
9. RichRod turns out to be the wizard-hat-wearing, snake-oil-selling, hair-plugged, paper-shredding, crying-on-the-sidelines, Josh-Groban-singing, one-dimensional-offense-no-defense hilljack that Ohio State fans said he was.
10. Michigan fans are willing to ignore all of RichRod's faults because he runs the spread offense. Severe state of denial sets in (The cupboard was bare! It's Lloyd's fault! Back stabbers! Wait till he gets his own recruits! In Rod We Trust!). ALL IN!!!!!!
11. 2009: Another horrid year, with no hope in sight. 5-7. 1-7 in Big Ten. Former players embarrassed to be associated with the program. APR falling like a rock. Another loss to Michigan State. Another loss to Ohio State. No bowl game (again). RichRod poaching three-star recruits from Purdue, service academies, directional schools, the MAC. Slot dots galore!
12. Michigan fan base divided - many finally see the light (cloakers), but some RichRod cultists are still willing to go full Kamikaze (hold-the-ropers).
13. 2010: NCAA sanctions. Worst defense ever, gives up 458 points (35.2 points per game). Offense is a one-man show and only shows flashes of brilliance, but is almost completely shut down by ranked teams. Yet another loss to Michigan State. Yet another blow out loss to Ohio State. Blown out in bowl game, team quits.
14. 2011: After fucking up the Michigan program light years beyond Buckeye fans' wildest dreams, RichRod is finally fired.
15. Michigan Man Harbaugh says "no thanks".
16. Michigan Man Miles says "no thanks".
17. Michigan Man Hoke decides to hold the rope.
Now, Michigan is basically back to where it was in 2007, except that their program doesn't need just a little tweaking, but rather it is in a complete shambles - the cupboard is truly bare, the offense is built for one-dimensional spread, the defense is basically non-existent, the special teams are short bus special, the best player on the team is a complete misfit for anything other than the spread, and the 38th-ranked recruting class has only 12 commitments. Instead of needing a couple of years to fine-tune the Michigan program (as was the case in 2007), Hoke will now need 2-3 years just to undo the damage caused by RichRod, and another 2-3 years to get Michigan back to contention in the Big Ten. And that's only if he can re-establish recruiting roots in the state of Ohio, which is not a foregone conclusion. If Hoke can't get a serious infusion of talent, and soon, then it is quite possible that Michigan will go the way of Notre Dame.
GBYBM YMSOB
:osu:
Hopefully not a dupe...
