Recruits & Gangs

[kn1f3party]

You can put zero of the blame on the kids. I made decisions that changed my life at 20 and got out of my circumstances, and now that I'm older I would say that was incredibly young to have done those things on my own with zero support. I don't expect the kids to do anything.

This whole rant started with my statement, but it explicitly applied to the parents. In this kids case the parents are together and seem to have their heads screwed on correctly. I guess I don't understand, in this case or similar cases, why they don't get out.

But I agree with the notion that many of these homes are so broken or in disarray that by the time a kid can make these decisions on their own it is likely too late.

 

[ShowMeBuck]

The immigrants that you speak of were encouraged by their families and friends to leave for prosperity. Poor families in America aren't

So let me get this straight - if I had a family in the hood I would need my friends and family to encourage me to move? If my kids were in danger of drive by shootings and drugs, etc. I wouldn't need ANYONE to approve of my move. It would be "see ya" and I wouldn't think twice. And to your point of turning your back on the neighborhood where you grew up? Please. As a parent, you have one obligation that stands above all others and it is to keep your kids safe and give them good surroundings to live in. To be clear, I don't blame the kids at all. They don't have the ability to relocate on their own. I put all of it on the parents. I am not out to change any opinions btw. I learned a long time ago that adults fall in 2 camps - those that take responsibility for their place in life and those that blame other people and other factors.

 

[sandgk]

I'm guessing that last response elides over any economic constraint making a move by the parents a virtual impossibility.

As income goes down mobility becomes erased.

 

[pnuts34]

I'm guessing that last response elides over any economic constraint making a move by the parents a virtual impossibility.

As income goes down mobility becomes erased.

Thank your and I agree fully.

And I am not at all blaming the children either, but economics factor a lot into the matter. And a lot times families can't afford the gas money or groceries to leave. And that's the honest truth. And many times the adults in the kids lives have very few means.

 

[matcar]

I'm guessing that last response elides over any economic constraint making a move by the parents a virtual impossibility.

As income goes down mobility becomes erased.

Mmm, not entirely true. Federal assistance, albiet limited is certainly enough to reside elsewhere. And poverty and limited income can exist in many locations other than those referenced above. It's a question of whether those in that situation choose to leave it. They can, but they may not know or even consider it. Often the obstacles to leave seem much larger than they are. Again, a socio-economic issue, not entirely economic.

 

[kn1f3party]

I see what you're saying, but don't agree.

My brother didn't work for 3 months and was able to move across the state and get an apartment. It isn't easy, but you do what you have to do to improve you and your family's life. If that means they start taking government assistance and saving the money they would have otherwise used on groceries, so be it. Maybe this is all they know so they don't realize just how bad they have it, but when your kid has a high percentage of getting gunned down because he decided to go with a certain wardrobe on a certain day you live in a dangerous place. They may not have chosen to grow up there, but they can choose to hatch their chicks outside of the fox's den.

 

[Jake]

Without arguing the merits/problems with non-traditional familes, I think its safe to conclude that a large percentage of urban athletes come from single parent homes or were raised by grandparents/uncles - etc.

It is unreasonable to suggest that these individuals have the means or knowledge on how to get their familes out of the impovershied areas as opposed to the will power.

I was one of three kids raised by a single mom (divorced when I was 5) in a lousy rental property across the street from a drug-infested housing project. Fortunately, the gang activity in that slum mostly centered around fist fights and theft, but it sure wasn't a place where people with means lived.

My mom took a part time minimum wage job with no benefits even though she could've received more from welfare and medicaid? Why? Because she was smart enough to know that once you get on that it is hard to wean yourself off it. Throw in a HUD house and you aren't moving anywhere.

So we roughed it for awhile...10 years later she was in charge of the billing department and supervising about 20 employees. She worked us out of that neighborhood, but she took risks to do it. The "safety net" isn't going to get you out of there. Whether or not that is by design is a topic for the political forum.

 

[kn1f3party]

You get one life, do something with it. Money be damned.

 

[osugrad21]

So let me get this straight - if I had a family in the hood I would need my friends and family to encourage me to move? If my kids were in danger of drive by shootings and drugs, etc. I wouldn't need ANYONE to approve of my move. It would be "see ya" and I wouldn't think twice. And to your point of turning your back on the neighborhood where you grew up? Please. As a parent, you have one obligation that stands above all others and it is to keep your kids safe and give them good surroundings to live in. To be clear, I don't blame the kids at all. They don't have the ability to relocate on their own. I put all of it on the parents. I am not out to change any opinions btw. I learned a long time ago that adults fall in 2 camps - those that take responsibility for their place in life and those that blame other people and other factors.

I appreciate your values. I do.

However, you are absolutely clueless about true poverty and 'the hood'.

Side note...I wonder if John Singleton regrets coining that phrase into pop culture.

 

[BuckFan38]

However, you are absolutely clueless about true poverty and 'the hood'.

I think he's clueless about the mindset of the people who choose to stay in the hood...which would make two of us, because i dont understand it either.
No one should act like there isnt a choice to move. Ever selpt in the back seat of a car? Its rent free and you can move anywhere. Everything in life is a choice.

 

[osugrad21]

No one should act like there isnt a choice to move. Ever selpt in the back seat of a car? Its rent free and you can move anywhere. Everything in life is a choice.

Simple. Sure. It worked for Will Smith in the movie right?

This thread is teeming with blanket assumptions and pop culture stereotypes. Honestly, until someone deals with true poverty and the mindsets that prevail throughout the vicious cycle, it is impossible to understand.

I'll just agree to disagree.

 

[Merih]

This thread is a trainwreck. I always knew people didn't understand what life is like for others, but it's still always somewhat shocking to see it broadcast and on display.

On the original topic, good for him for seeing this as a real opportunity.

 

[pnuts34]

This thread is a trainwreck. I always knew people didn't understand what life is like for others, but it's still always somewhat shocking to see it broadcast and on display.

On the original topic, good for him for seeing this as a real opportunity.

I agree while banging my head against a wall, lol. This thread I know was started with the best intentions, but some people are just not able to see life through someone else's eyes. It sucks really but what can u do
And I also agree.

 

[kn1f3party]

Excellent story nonetheless.

[/Passive aggressive arguing, altruism, etc.]

 

[matcar]

Simple. Sure. It worked for Will Smith in the movie right?

This thread is teeming with blanket assumptions and pop culture stereotypes. Honestly, until someone deals with true poverty and the mindsets that prevail throughout the vicious cycle, it is impossible to understand.

I'll just agree to disagree.

Yes. Again, leaving isn't financially impossible. But making decisions to do so and taking those risks...well in many ways it takes as much courage as it does to stay in such a potentially dangerous place.