You don't have much experience over there, do you?
"Bill Cosby was released! The Big Ten hates us!"
"The referees are corrupt. Non-Big Ten referees would have kept him in prison forever."
"Joe invented instant replay."
"O$U fans are the worst."
"Our 1994 team would have executed Bill Cosby. In fact, they almost did execute him, because Joe knew everything and knew that Bill Cosby was raping women. Or he had already raped women. Or he would rape women soon. But Joe didn't know what rape was. Also, he didn't want to ruin a weekend so he let Bill Cosby off with a warning."
"Let's get out of this corrupt conference. If only Joe had gotten his Elite Eastern Conference of Superiority and Honorable Honor. In what year would a conference made up of Penn State, Pitt, Temple, and 5 more awesome teams like that NOT win the national championship?"
"Aw shit, I spilled my Iron City beer when I was pointing my loaded shotgun at the TV for not showing Joe more on its replays of old Penn State games. That brings up a good point: why is this stuff so cheap and why doesn't Joe have his own channel? I'll tell you why not - they might demand that he get paid a fair amount of money and Joe didn't need no money."
Something like that.