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Movie Team Dynasty Report

Gary Gaines;1515227; said:
Dang it Shark, why did you have to go and injury Boobie for? My trainer just called me and said he's out for 2 weeks with a damn hip pointer. I thought he just pulled himself out of the game to protect his ypc average.
I wasn't fucking around when I threw down the gauntlet. That little bitch of yours got "hurt" just looking at me before the snap.
 
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And now let's take a look at our most valuable players this week...

Week #3
potw3.jpg

Defense: Guard Englehart, DT, Allenville Penitentiary

  • 5 Tkl 3 TFL 3 sack 1 FF
Offense: Darnell Jackson, HB, ESU

  • 31 att 231 yds TD
 
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The ESU Timberwolves steamrolled previously unbeaten Wake Forest 60-24.

Quarterback Joe Kane was a pedestrian 19/28 for 222 2/2

However, the fireworks were provided by freshman phenom Darnell Jefferson, who carried 43 times, for 315 yards and 4 touchdowns.

Senior All American LB Alvin Mack led the way defensively with 7 tackles, 1 tfl.
 
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Our secondary just ran into Superman. South Carolina's Stephen Garcia was amazing, 35-47 for 427 and two tds. He had 300 yds passing after his first completion after halftime.

Unable to defend his pinpoint accuracy, I decided to release the hounds and try and rattle him. Garcia still completed many passes under pressure, but between a few key turnovers and 2-3 4th down stops in the redzone, we did just enough to weather the storm and also forced a few key strips in scoring position.

Freshman lb Chris Jones had a whale of a game after we told him to make the quarterback?s life a living nightmare He finished with 15 tackles, 7 for loss, and 6 sacks.

The final score is misleading. We were losing by 7 until 1 min left in the third, only winning by 4 with 3 min left (forced a scar fg). We also got two redzone stops after that, plus two late tds to ice the game.

Beamen struggled to pass the ball all game (131 of beamen's 213 passing yds came in the last 5 min). On the other hand, our offense put up big numbers on the ground, totalling 300 yds as a team, led by franchise rb Washington's 26 for 180 and 2 td performance. I guess old school football isn?t as dead as Christine wants you to believe.
 
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Gary, you better believe my boy is ready to play next week! He's been talking for the past two weeks about how pissed he was for missing the game against the Sharks.

In some other news I've heard through the grape vines Ole' Gary has picked up a few recruits for next season. A 3* DE and a 4* punter. Quite a few of our other top recruits have us right there with Allenville. So next weeks match up should show us who their favorites are.
 
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Okay, so someone just reminded me that I'm supposed to be doing these updates after every game. Oh well, that's what happens when you get to be my age, you become more tired, more forgetful, and your bones get brittle...

Ah yes, I love peanut brittle.

That reminds me of the time when Springfield was known as the Peanut Brittle Capital of the world. The year was 1929, and at that time Springfield was known for 3 things: fine dairy products, tasty bakery items, and whores.

All 3 goods were provided by the same entrepreneur... Miss Penelope Sugarbottom. Ah yes, she ran a bakery, a dairy farm, and the busiest little brothel this side of Washington DC. All three businesses were located right next to each other.

Anyways, she ran her businesses for several years and was very successful during that time. After a while the crime rate started to rise and prostituition was finally outlawed in Springfield, in 1932. They forced Penelope to close all three of her businesses, because they didn't feel it would be appropriate for her to continue to market her bakery and dairy with her existing slogan "Sugarbottoms Dairy and Bakery, home of the best milk jugs and pie."

So Penelope started a new business, a confectionary. It didn't take long before that business was doing well too. Men, in particular, would travel from all over the tri-state area. Her specialty item was peanut brittle. She always had plenty of candy in the main part of the store, but she kept the peanut brittle in the back storerooms. So customers would enter the store, order their peanut brittle, and then head to the back rooms to get their purchases.

Of course, there wasn't any peanut brittle back there, instead there were rooms with whores, but her customers always left happy.

Oh yes, back to the game results.

So we played Clemson this week which was odd, because our teams our nearly mirror images of each other. In a way, it's kinda like kissing your sister, except they have a better MLB and a couple of other players.

Due to our lack of having a strong MLB on our team, Freshman Jimbo Jones has been moved from OLB to MLB since our first game. And he has continued his excellent play with another pick six. His interception, and subsequent TD return on the screen pass was his 3rd scoring play of the year. So far he has 2 INTs and 1 fumble recovery. He has returned all 3 turnovers for touchdowns, and I believe he is well on his way to earning Freshman All-American accolades.

Accolades... aren't those the big SUV kids are driving these days... the Cadillac Accolade? Oh well...

Offensively, QB Stan Taylor has remained adequate with his play but needs to get better at throwing the ball away. RB Ned Flanders has struggled a bit running the ball lately, but that could be partly due to starting RG Julius Hibberd being injured the past few games, and he will remain out for the next 2-3 weeks. Ned's done a nice job picking up some tough yards and being a fine receiver out of the back field.

Overall, I was just glad we were able to prevent their QB, Korn, from leading a game tying drive at the end.

Korn... Say, that reminds me of the great Shelbyville Corn Heist of 1937... ZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzz..............
 
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Game of the week recap:

zzz34_325229.gif
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bucs2.png



Zissou finally gets one for the win column in Hoover, AL, holding off the Bucs 38-35.


Team Zissou exploded out of the gates, leading 21-0 after 5 min, thanks to a pick 6 by Hoover:

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mdl6fd7ckqA"]YouTube - John Parker Wilson...sucks summore.[/ame]

and two TD passes by Plimpton, one captured here:

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ab4Y7FowUyQ"]YouTube - Guys, let's try tackling him...[/ame].



Hoover would answer with two TD passes to Chad Jackson from their emerging young QB. One of which had pro-scouts salivating. Watch as he looks off the safety fools the coverage with a pump fake; then delivers an amazing ball into the back left corner of the endzone:

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vdRNS7arEQY"]YouTube - Ok...he's now officially the starter.[/ame]

However, Zissou stretched the lead to 10, despite only having :59 with which to operate.

In the second half, the two teams went back and forth, with highlights abound:

Battle would find the endzone again through the air, this time to star WR Charlie Zorn. Yet Zissou continued to answer, passing for a TD only 33 seconds later. They would tack on another TD run 3 min later. 38-21.

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vdRNS7arEQY"]YouTube - Ok...he's now officially the starter.[/ame]

Battle added his fourth and fifth TD passes in the next two min, cutting the lead to 3 with 6:31 remaining. Zissou drove and threatened to put the game away, however on 4th and goal they would be held short of the goal line!

4th%20goal%20stop%20zissou.jpg


Hoover would concurrently then throw an INT. Zissou ball with the game ticking away. 3rd down, Hoover's last chance to stop them and get the ball back...Zissou needs to get to the 48 yard line...this is where things got dicey:

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7NENvzfI-iM"]YouTube - Did he make it to the 48? You tell me...(no)[/ame]

Zissou would hold on for the controversial victory and leave coach Propst humiliated. This loss would send Hoover into a tailspin, which would last into the next week's game.​
 
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finally got one... finally limited the mistakes on O, one pick on a jump ball. D played well, nice close game...

We had a 3rd and short with 1:30 left, threw it, got tackled at the line, was close... but they gave us the 1st to let the clock wind down.

maybe the recruits will see that big road win, and come back.
 
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