Homemade Cheez It Crackers....

[LoKyBuckeye]

Wouldn't that be a Jerky Chute?

:p

Hey... I'm not the one that makes it

 

[Zurp]

You need to invest in a Jerky Shoot... it's basically PVC pipe that allows the jerky to be guided exactly where you want it to go.

What happens when the jerky gets clogged in there? Just dump some draino down the chute?

 

[iambrutus]

What happens when the jerky gets clogged in there? Just dump some draino down the chute?

no, push a midget through

 

[Zurp]

no, push a midget through

I can see it now:

"You want me to do what?"
"Go down the jerky chute and clear the jerky so everyone can get his jerky."
"Down that 4" PVC pipe?"
"Yeah. You might want to grease yourself up a bit. It'll be tight, even for you."
"But there's jerky in there?"
"Yeah. You want me to use this stick to help push you when you get stuck?"
"No thanks" (Already down the hole) "I've got in under control."

I wish I was a zombie. Or a pilot. But I will not, under any circumstances, be a washing machine.

 

[iambrutus]

I can see it now:

"You want me to do what?"
"Go down the jerky chute and clear the jerky so everyone can get his jerky."
"Down that 4" PVC pipe?"
"Yeah. You might want to grease yourself up a bit. It'll be tight, even for you."
"But there's jerky in there?"
"Yeah. You want me to use this stick to help push you when you get stuck?"
"No thanks" (Already down the hole) "I've got in under control."

I wish I was a zombie. Or a pilot. But I will not, under any circumstances, be a washing machine.

do midgets always get hazard pay, since at any point someone could step on them?

 

[BuckBackHome]

midgets

I believe the proper term is "Vertically Challenged." Kind of like obese people are "Horizontally Challenged."

 

[Zurp]

do midgets always get hazard pay, since at any point someone could step on them?

Not if they work for me. And that beef jerky they unclog is coming out of their paychecks.

 

[LoKyBuckeye]

What happens when the jerky gets clogged in there? Just dump some draino down the chute?

I'd be leery of draino... it's expensive. a midget would work but then you have to pay him... have insurance... Workman's comp etc... the best jerky chute cleaner is a monkey. He'll work cheap and when he's not needed he can dance for the amusement of everyone while they eat their jerky.

 

[Zurp]

I'd be leery of draino... it's expensive. a midget would work but then you have to pay him... have insurance... Workman's comp etc... the best jerky chute cleaner is a monkey. He'll work cheap and when he's not needed he can dance for the amusement of everyone while they eat their jerky.

Interesting. But will the monkey steal ball-point pens from the office? I mean, will they steal them more than the otherwise "normal" employees do?

 

[iambrutus]

I'd be leery of draino... it's expensive. a midget would work but then you have to pay him... have insurance... Workman's comp etc... the best jerky chute cleaner is a monkey. He'll work cheap and when he's not needed he can dance for the amusement of everyone while they eat their jerky.

LoKY you could be a business analyst, you're so smart.

 

[LoKyBuckeye]

Interesting. But will the monkey steal ball-point pens from the office? I mean, will they steal them more than the otherwise "normal" employees do?

probably not... and surprisingly most species of monkey actually bring pens to work with them... it's the staplers you have to worry about.

 

[LoKyBuckeye]

LoKY you could be a business analyst, you're so smart.

that's what I'm told... it's all about the bottom line.

 

[iambrutus]

that's what I'm told... it's all about the bottom line.

is that the goal line? or the foul line? i'm scared.

i love beef jerky, i just opened a new bag - we haven't got the chute installed yet.

 

[Zurp]

probably not... and surprisingly most species of monkey actually bring pens to work with them... it's the staplers you have to worry about.

Crap. I'm starting to worry about these monkeys. Can they be trained to sit here and type on BP all day? If so, I may be down-sized. Or monkey-sized.

 

[BB73]

If beef jerky gets stuck in the chute, it's like a clogged pipeline. The machine's used to fix that are called 'pigs'.

So I'm thinking that pork jerky, being from pigs, would fix the plugged-up beef jerky.