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Headlines You Don't See Every Day (outside of Florida)

Isn't there a puking emoticon?
Can I go for the "kill" option first? I choose myself.

I'm with you.

Marry is easy because Oprah's money would help me overlook everything else.

Killing one of the other two is also easy

Then the deal breaker.....you have to fuck the survivor.

mother of god

:no:
 
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Re: A pilot lost control of a passenger plane after his artificial arm became detached as he was coming in to land, an accident report has said.
In a statement, Flybe said the senior captain was one of its "most experienced and trusted pilots", and the safety of passengers and crew had not been compromised in any way.
However, as he made the flare manoeuvre - a stage of the landing shortly before touchdown - "his prosthetic limb became detached from the yoke clamp, depriving him of control of the aircraft".
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While he had thought about getting his co-pilot to take control, the time available and the challenging conditions meant his best course of action was to move his right hand from the power levers on to the yoke to regain control.
"He did this, but with power still applied and possibly a gust affecting the aircraft, a normal touchdown was followed by a bounce, from which the aircraft landed heavily," the report found.
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Captain Ian Baston, Flybe's director of flight operations and safety, said it was an equal opportunities employer and "in common with most airlines, means we do employ staff with reduced physical abilities".

Bullshit, the guy needs to be assigned to a desk job.
 
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99cce7fc42a4021034b70ae47a58865402c96c1d5226a2206b963db5f431ea17.jpg
 
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Re: A pilot lost control of a passenger plane after his artificial arm became detached as he was coming in to land, an accident report has said.
In a statement, Flybe said the senior captain was one of its "most experienced and trusted pilots", and the safety of passengers and crew had not been compromised in any way.
However, as he made the flare manoeuvre - a stage of the landing shortly before touchdown - "his prosthetic limb became detached from the yoke clamp, depriving him of control of the aircraft".
.
.
While he had thought about getting his co-pilot to take control, the time available and the challenging conditions meant his best course of action was to move his right hand from the power levers on to the yoke to regain control.
"He did this, but with power still applied and possibly a gust affecting the aircraft, a normal touchdown was followed by a bounce, from which the aircraft landed heavily," the report found.
.
.
Captain Ian Baston, Flybe's director of flight operations and safety, said it was an equal opportunities employer and "in common with most airlines, means we do employ staff with reduced physical abilities".

Bull[Mark May], the guy needs to be assigned to a desk job.
Agreed. It's time to hang it up....or detach it and put it in a drawer or something, I don't know.
 
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Captain Ian Baston, Flybe's director of flight operations and safety, said it was an equal opportunities employer and "in common with most airlines, means we do employ staff with reduced physical abilities".

Forwarding this to my unemployed blind cousin, my nephew with epilepsy, and my brother-in-law whose IQ is roughly the equivalent of a stale donut...right after I contact a real estate agent to have them find me an underground house.
 
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