thanks fellas...it was a good one. Dinner with some friends, and some quality time with the woman...
Got a story about my dad too. So over the summer my dad's bike got stolen and he has a neighbor that has one of those nice mountain/race bikes with the slender tires. My dad knocks on the neighbors door and says, "Wow, I like this bike. I've been thinking about buying one since my last one got stolen." The neighbor tells him about it and lets him borrow it. So my dad takes the bike out and right by his house is the metroparks. So he's riding the bike, enjoying the scenery and he flips some of the gears to go faster. He gets to the entrance to the metroparks and it's big hill to get down into them. He starts thinking to himself, "This bike is titties, got skinny tires, and goes fast...I like titties, I'm skinny, and shit, I like to go fast." So my dad is cruising down this hill, switches gears, starts going faster, then loses control and wipes out. He didn't quite ruin the bike, but did more damage to himself. He winds up shattering his right knee cap. Fast forward a few weeks. My dad is up moving about with this giant cast going from his thigh to the bottom of his calf. He's over at my mom's house working on a car and you all know how my dad likes to drop deuces or cut sweet ones. Sure enough, my dad needs to take a dump probably due to the empty jar of Ortega. To get all of you a mental image of my house and where the bathroom is. Our back door hall way has a bathroom off to the side of it and the hallway leads right into the kitchen. You can sit on the pot and see what's cooking for dinner. Anyway, he didn't want to use the upstairs bathroom, and there are no stairs either for my dad to climb on the first floor so naturally, he'd use this bathroom. However, the way this bathroom was designed, it's not conducive for people who can't bend their legs. To close the door you can't have your legs stretched out, especially the right leg, and because of the rather large cast on my dad's right leg, he left the door open for the entire downstairs to wallow in the smell. My mom comes home and immediately knows something's up. She walks into the kitchen and sees my dad's right leg sticking out the bathroom door and flips. My dad is sitting on his throne laughing away, and says, "What do you want me to do?" Mom yells out, "Open the window!!! Flush!!! Drop Dead!!!" So the rest of the time my dad is laughing, reading whatever material he had in there, and my mom is sorting through groceries, nose deep in coffee grounds every 5 seconds.
