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ESPN (A bunch of Death-Spiraling maroons)

It is so like, not just ESPN, but everyone like them, to orchestrate things this way.

  1. Get people to agree in principle to something (expanding the playoff to 12)
  2. All the while withholding information that would absolutely change the deal for everyone else at the table (that you're about to move UT and OK to the SEC)
  3. Drop the other shoe (have others announce the UT/OK move)
  4. When people want to revisit point #1, accuse them of going back on their word, as if you didn't have those talks in bad faith.
#4 hasn't happened yet, but if the rest of college football are smart enough to follow @BB73 's advice and insist on keeping the playoff at 4 instead of just blindly heading over the cliff like a bunch of conference-expansionist lemmings, then #4 is an absolute certainty. This is the mating call of the giant douchebag; deal in bad faith and then accuse the other side of violating their sacred word as if they themselves are paragons of virtue.
 
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I watched part of ESPN's broadcast of the NBA draft last night. Kendrick Perkins was butchering the pronunciation of players' names repeatedly, and randomly laughing just as guys were about to be picked - I guess that qualifies as comic relief at ESPN these days. I watched it up until Rece Davis thought it was worth mentioning the SEC had 8 first round picks "and that doesn't even include Texas!" Well no shit, those players had nothing to do with the SEC. The problem is these guys think they're funny. Well you're not on Comedy Central, dumbasses.
 
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In a moment of weakness and charity for ESPN, I offer this tidbit on the announcers of NBC's Olympic coverage team.

So why am I going to miss all those clowns…It’s real simple! They gave great soundbytes! Here are the top nine comments, (yes nine) made by NBC sports commentators during the Summer Olympics that they would like to take back:

1. Weightlifting commentator: 'This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria . I saw her snatch this morning during her warm-up and it was amazing.'

2. Dressage commentator: 'This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother.'

3. Paul Hamm, Gymnast: 'I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father.'

4. Boxing Analyst: 'Sure there have been injuries, and even some deaths in boxing, but none of them really that serious.

5.Softball announcer: 'If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again.

6.. Basketball analyst: 'He dribbles a lot and the opposition doesn't like it. In fact you can see it all over their faces.'

7. At the rowing medal ceremony: 'Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the IOC president is hugging the cox of the British crew.

8. Soccer commentator: 'Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field.

9. Tennis commentator: 'One of the reasons Andy is playing so well is that, before the final round, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them... Oh my God, what have I just said?'

10. My words: Call David Letterman and get your own number ten if you want a f******** top ten list, Jack!!

America at its finest again…God Bless the U.S.A.!
 
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In a moment of weakness and charity for ESPN, I offer this tidbit on the announcers of NBC's Olympic coverage team.

So why am I going to miss all those clowns…It’s real simple! They gave great soundbytes! Here are the top nine comments, (yes nine) made by NBC sports commentators during the Summer Olympics that they would like to take back:

1. Weightlifting commentator: 'This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria . I saw her snatch this morning during her warm-up and it was amazing.'

2. Dressage commentator: 'This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother.'

3. Paul Hamm, Gymnast: 'I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father.'

4. Boxing Analyst: 'Sure there have been injuries, and even some deaths in boxing, but none of them really that serious.

5.Softball announcer: 'If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again.

6.. Basketball analyst: 'He dribbles a lot and the opposition doesn't like it. In fact you can see it all over their faces.'

7. At the rowing medal ceremony: 'Ah, isn't that nice, the wife of the IOC president is hugging the cox of the British crew.

8. Soccer commentator: 'Julian Dicks is everywhere. It's like they've got eleven Dicks on the field.

9. Tennis commentator: 'One of the reasons Andy is playing so well is that, before the final round, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them... Oh my God, what have I just said?'

10. My words: Call David Letterman and get your own number ten if you want a f******** top ten list, Jack!!

America at its finest again…God Bless the U.S.A.!
At least the Tennis dude actually caught on to what he said
 
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2. Dressage commentator: 'This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother.'

snl-saturday-night-live.gif
 
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And what was maybe more notable than that blowout was the degree to which ESPN’s announcers (Anish Shroff and Tom Luginbill) went in on Bishop Sycamore, including disputing the school’s claims about having Division I recruits, criticizing the game that they were showing, and questioning how it wound up on their airwaves.

https://awfulannouncing.com/high-school/espn-img-bishop-sycamore-hs-blowout.html
 
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