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2023 tCun Shenanigans, Arguments, Cobras, Feckless Marmots, Fake Pandas, Dirty Cheaters

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Jaxbuck said:
Plausible deniability defn:

You don't ask a question you don't want to know the answer to so that you can always, technically, say "I didn't know" when you get called on the carpet.
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and basic rule 1 for attorneys “at trial, never ask a question to which you do not already know the answer,”
 
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BB73 said:
In fairness, it’s not all General Studies up there, they also issue athletes a ton of degrees in ‘Kinesiology’ because it sounds technical.
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I remember when I was at OSU a popular major among athletes was Recreation Education. We used to joke about what that entailed.
 
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1926Buckeyes said:
It's all so obvious though. What's the point of a last dance when everyone knows it'll be vacated or forfeited in a few years?

They're digging holes but have to know this all comes out soon enough. I guess they think they can jump ship this spring and summer and come out unscathed.
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This is why I think it's so important to take their souls here.

Let them go into the long winter knowing that those 2+ years were just a mirage and it's back to the 20+ year narrative of being our bitch.

They cruelest way to do it is leave the coaches in place and just take away their ability to cheat, then have them lose once the cheating is taken away. I know they will spin/deflect/posture and all that but in their simple, dark hearts they will know and will haunt them forever.

As we said when they hired Jimmy, they are all in on him being the savior. I want them to realize that he wasn't and they were all in.

Get them here:
66UeoJ.gif


and then give them this
tommy-lee-jones-i-dont-care.gif


as the hammer falls
 
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One other point.

Much (I wont say all) of this stems from Stalions enchantment with the program. Stalions refuses to cooperate.

UM claims he acted alone. Wouldn't it help if Michigan asked him to cooperate? Isn't he the best person to convince investigators that it was all him? Wouldn't the author of a 600 page manifesto be happy to do whatever is asked of him?
 
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1926Buckeyes said:
No reason to deny when you know you're leaving to become an SEC POWERHOUSE :beer:
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The only reason the deal with the S-E-C hasn't been announced is the S-E-C is right now trying to come up with the $600 million (cash, small, unmarked bills) they agreed to pay the cheaters. TCUN asked for $1 billion but the S-E-C couldn't come up with that. The plane is sitting on the runway in Birmingham right now waiting to take off for Ann Arbor (is a whore) as soon as they have the $ together. I live in the middle of S-E-C country. I wouldn't have posted this if I hadn't verified the details with my neighbor who got it from his sister's aunt's cousin. She checked with her mailman and said that's exactly where things stand. It would have been simpler if he had just checked himself with his sister's aunt's cousin since he's married to her.
 
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Oh8ch said:
One other point.

Much (I wont say all) of this stems from Stalions enchantment with the program. Stalions refuses to cooperate.

UM claims he acted alone. Wouldn't it help if Michigan asked him to cooperate? Isn't he the best person to convince investigators that it was all him? Wouldn't the author of a 600 page manifesto be happy to do whatever is asked of him?
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Where do we think his laptop is now? Does he have it? Does tCun have it? Does the NCAA have it? Or was it stuck to a giant magnet before being pulverized in a junkyard in Hamtramck?
 
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Jake said:
Feels like we're going to be served a nothing burger today. We'll see.
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Yep. A press conference would already have been announced for later today. If it doesn't happen today, I have a sick feeling that Petitty is going to cave, and we'll have to watch dfbia and their clown president fist pumping that they've been totally exonerated. If Petitty doesn't act, I hope the other 13 Presidents show him the door real fast.
 
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You can nitpick all the way through the ten page letter, but I very specifically want to highlight the hypocrisy of the position that Harbaugh wasn’t the one who “committed an offensive action” and therefore can’t be punished (1B).

How about not preventing your subordinates from blatantly cheating is the “offensive action” you fucknuts. It’s really not that hard when the language is broad and gives broad discretion.

Moving back, 1A is a page and a half that says the conference usually prefers to defer to the NCAA on investigations. Pretty sure in completely unprecedented situations like this normal preferences (which aren’t hard rules) can be set aside.

Continue to do my best to read through this piece of garbage.

As has been clear the entire time, they’re not even trying to argue they’re innocent, they’re just desperately trying to stretch it out so they can play the games and maybe win a championship.

Edit: Section II’s title gives away that game immediately. “Disciplinary Action is Premature” in which the second sentence states “there is no reason to shortcut a full investigation in favor of summary punishment,” um, how about the reason is to punish blatant cheating in real time rather than let the cheating reap a potential trophy. As everyone has ALSO been saying, all this bullshit goes away if they lose a game and are no longer in title contention.
 
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AJHawkfan said:
So...... (and please,bear with me here....I'm not a lawyer, compliance officer or in law enforcement)...... if there is an active investigation going on, and the head of that organization being investigated refuses to cooperate with the investigating parties, what conclusion could the investigating parties reasonably draw from that decision?
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That’s why he should be suspended until the investigation is made clear. Just standard practice to suspend someone (as they did with porn coach) pending the investigation
 
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