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2023 tCun Shenanigans, Arguments, Cobras, Feckless Marmots, Fake Pandas, Dirty Cheaters

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”You always want to be above reproach, especially when you’re good, because you don’t want people to come back and say, ‘They’re winning because they’re cheating.’ That’s always going to be a knee-jerk reaction in my experience, ever since I was a little kid. We want to be above reproach in everything and do everything by the rules. Because if you don’t, if you cheat to win, then you’ve already lost, according to Bo Schembechler. And Bo Schembechler is about next to the word of God as you can get in my mind. It’s not the word of God, but it’s close.”

-- Jim Harbaugh, 2013
 
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For the DFBIA members that want to poo-poo this like it's no big deal, it might be helpful for them to recognize that when Belichick and the Patriots were caught doing this, once by the way, by a former assistant (Mangini), the NFL responded with the largest fine in the history of the NFL, the maximum fine on an individual coach/GM permissible by league/union/CBA rules, and the biggest NFL draft forfeiture ever.

Stalions didn't do this once, but (allegedly) at least 30 times.
 
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How about letting opponents use headset communications and Asterisk of Michigan continues signaling. Big Ten opponent fans crowdsource videotaping Michigan's signals going forward and use AI if necessary to crack their codes. Since that wouldn't be university employees doing it (and hey, everybody does it), the Michigan Asterisks shouldn't have a problem with it.
 
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”You always want to be above reproach, especially when you’re good, because you don’t want people to come back and say, ‘They’re winning because they’re cheating.’ That’s always going to be a knee-jerk reaction in my experience, ever since I was a little kid. We want to be above reproach in everything and do everything by the rules. Because if you don’t, if you cheat to win, then you’ve already lost, according to Bo Schembechler. And Bo Schembechler is about next to the word of God as you can get in my mind. It’s not the word of God, but it’s close.”

-- Jim Harbaugh, 2013
Hilarious except where he makes Bo's word like the word of God. It's not even close to the truth.

And he's right, he's already lost since he cheated to get those "wins." And now he's lying about it.
 
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Lost in all of this, let's not forget to take a moment to thank the two men who made this all possible.

James Patrick Tressel
Urban Franklin Meyer.

I recall a quote from The Dark Knight

" With respect, sir, you crossed the line first. You squeezed them, you hammered them to the point of desperation". And in their desperation, they turned to a man they didn't fully understand".

Granted, scUM turned to a tactic and not a singular man himself. Beginning with winning in their house Tress' first year, all the way through to Urban dropping a 60 piece on them his last year - this is the psychological toll those losses took on that program and their fans.

It wasn't just the sheer amount of losing either. It was the ways in which they lost. scUM lost shootouts, they lost grind-it-out physical type games. They lost when ahead in the 4th quarter by two scores on their field. They lost close games they deem controversial (2016) they lost in blow out fashion, one of which was a supposed "ReVeNgE tOuR".
The Shoe', that giant PoS stadium up there... It didn't matter. They sacrificed tradition to hire outside coaches, in a vain attempt to beat tOSU, who only did further damage to their program.

Even more tragically funny, this is the same Harbaugh who reveres Bo. The man who taught him about honor and integrity. All of those quotes, all of that reverence and integrity, to fold like a house of cards just to beat the Buckeyes and let down your idol. Bravo. Everything you've built yourself on was shown to be bullshit when it mattered most. So not only have you done damage to your own University, you've ultimately destroyed yourself.

I can't abide suspending The Game. That's twice in 4 years, meaning tOSU would go 5 calendar years before celebrating a victory over TTUN. Nah, can't have that, it feels so wrong.


- Post season ban.
- Vacate all wins.
- Assistants and analysts fired with show clause.
- Harbaugh to resign end of season and not allowed to coach in the conference again.
- Meh on scholarship reductions. I'll let that marinate.

Watch every coach from now until The Game not shake Harbaughs hand. Watch them avoid him post game completely as he quickly darts to the tunnel like the hardass he tried portraying he was. It'll be top 10 ESPN. Watch how awkward and aggressive the post game pressers get and how the man will slowly begin to implode over 4 weeks, taking his assistant coaches and players along for the ride as the NCAA mulls greater punishment. The loudest rumors ever will swirl of players transferring. So many players that it looks like a biblical exodus.

Then beat their ass, at their house, doesn't matter if it's by one point or by 50 (God willing, 50) While they rally around their cheating ways and attempt to win one for the gipper. Give them that emotional high, only to have that final light of a proper joyful send off snuffed out by tOSU one last time. While Day stands on the M at the 50 and ignores one final handshake from Harbitch himself.



Harbaugh will walk off the field, not to cheers, but to a deafening silence. Only then will it begin to settle in at how complete and total their defeat and destruction has been.


The Lord could call me home after that, if it were to happen. And I would feel content knowing I've seen something miraculous happen.
 
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So, why did Michigan do this? Yes, to beat Ohio State, win Big Ten titles, and go to the playoffs. But why scout Purdue, Indiana, Rutgers, and the rest of the Big Ten bottom dwellers? Did Michigan really need an extra advantage to beat those teams? Was it simple paranoia? Were they scouting the bums to perfect their sign stealing system against MSU, PSU, and OSU? Or was something else going on here? As mentioned earlier in this thread, over the last three seasons, Michigan is 17-5-1 against the spread versus Big Ten teams, including 4-0-1 this year to date. It looks to me like Michigan was running what I will call a "reverse point shaving" scheme, where instead of "playing down" to bad competition to keep games close (within the spread) they were "cheating up" to cover the spread. Follow the money, folks. If someone affiliated the Michigan program won lots of cash betting on Michigan to cover, then this could get really ugly (like Federal pen ugly).

Just some thoughts to brighten your morning.

Here are a few good reason why to scout the rest of the Big Ten. If they have a system of cheating in place, you don't want to leave anything to chance.

Screen Shot 2023-10-24 at 11.07.06 AM.pngScreen Shot 2023-10-24 at 11.08.12 AM.pngScreen Shot 2023-10-24 at 11.09.16 AM.png
 
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Just to bring outside perspective... Dom Tiberi said on 97.1 a bit ago that "they should ban Harbaugh from coaching for a year. That's what they should do."

Um... you mean IN ADDITION TO forfeitures, probation, punitive measures on schollies and transfers, etc, etc... right?? I expected something at least a little more insightful or bold from him. He seems to be quite an enthusiastic Buckeyes fan but the thought of scUM forfeiting The last two Games hasn't crossed his mind?

This would be a perfect time for that station to open up the phone lines. I think that would be way better listening than their normal discussions, lol.
 
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Here are the three issues involved with the Michigan cheating scandal: (1) what to do about the past; (2) what to do about the future; and (3) how to get a quick resolution.

(1) The only team that was truly damaged in this scandal was Ohio State, whose loss to Michigan in 2021 cost them the Big Ten Title Game and a chance for the Playoffs; and whose loss in 2022 cost them the Big Ten Title Game; Michigan's opponents in those Big Ten Title Games were also potentially damaged, if those teams were "scouted" during the season. Nothing, not even forfeiting games can make Ohio State whole; vacating games would make Iowa the Big Ten champs for 2021 and Purdue for 2022.

(2) The Big Ten has real problem on its hands – the reputation of the league and the integrity of its brand are in jeopardy. Most immediately, there are two Big Ten teams – Ohio State and Penn State – that have a legitimate chance to make the Playoffs this season, with Ohio State's invitation being nearly guaranteed if they beat Michigan. There are also obvious issues with the league's "gambling partners" and with state and federal gaming regulators (what Michigan was doing was essentially a "reverse point shaving" scheme, see more below), not to mention the four powerful new members who now may not want to bring their huge media markets into a tainted league. And of course, the existing members (especially Ohio State, who suffered the most) are extremely pissed off and out for blood. The Big Ten does owe Michigan some "due process", but if the league really has the damning evidence of cheating then it needs to do something before things get really out of hand.

(3) The only way to get a quick resolution is to get Michigan to "plea bargain". Show them the smoking gun(s), make them an offer they can't refuse. What would that be? In my opinion, it would be something like this: (a) Michigan vacates all 33 wins from the 2021, 2022, and 2023 season up to this point; (b) Michigan forfeits all future games this season (those games would not be played at all); (c) Michigan fires all football coaches, and all staffers who might have had knowledge of this scheme; and (d) Harbaugh and the coordinators receive lifetime bans from coaching at Big Ten schools. In that scenario, Michigan wins a little bit – their "cheated" wins are vacated not forfeited, and they don't suffer any scholarship reductions or future bowl bans. The Big Ten also wins a bit because they prevent their "cheating" program from interfering with their flagship program's current playoff chances and they avoid any future embarrassment that would result from Michigan potentially winning an NC that would end up being vacated or forfeited; in addition, they have the "good look" of being proactive and meting out swift justice.

So, why did Michigan do this? Yes, to beat Ohio State, win Big Ten titles, and go to the playoffs. But why scout Purdue, Indiana, Rutgers, and the rest of the Big Ten bottom dwellers? Did Michigan really need an extra advantage to beat those teams? Was it simple paranoia? Were they scouting the bums to perfect their sign stealing system against MSU, PSU, and OSU? Or was something else going on here? As mentioned earlier in this thread, over the last three seasons, Michigan is 17-5-1 against the spread versus Big Ten teams, including 4-0-1 this year to date. It looks to me like Michigan was running what I will call a "reverse point shaving" scheme, where instead of "playing down" to bad competition to keep games close (within the spread) they were "cheating up" to cover the spread. Follow the money, folks. If someone affiliated the Michigan program won lots of cash betting on Michigan to cover, then this could get really ugly (like Federal pen ugly).

Just some thoughts to brighten your morning.
Very well said. Wanted to touch on something.

You’re spot on with what should happen to them now with a plea deal. If they let them finish the year then they had better nail them really really hard for future seasons. Personally best case is they say fuck it let’s roll and we beat them anyways (which I don’t think is very likely). Then they get cleaned out after the year.

There would need to be vacated results for 3 years, scholarships lost, coaches fired and multiple years of bowl bans.

There’s no way they’re giving up on this years team though. Regardless of their cheating they have a very very good team right now and they’re going to do everything they can to play this year.

As for betting? That was the second thought I had when this came out. They could make a lot of money if they knew the plays and if they’re using this to cheat games then that’s not a far leap to make for someone to cheat the gambling circuit as well.
 
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Watching Stallions talking to coordinators and even Harbaugh at critical points in The Game last year is wild. This is just beginning.

Also, I wiped that game from my mind and forgot it was 20-24 going into the 4th.
A first year analyst with no coaching experience just happens to have access to the HC and the coordinators in the middle of the biggest game of the year. Totally normal goings on there.
 
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For the DFBIA members that want to poo-poo this like it's no big deal, it might be helpful for them to recognize that when Belichick and the Patriots were caught doing this, once by the way, by a former assistant (Mangini), the NFL responded with the largest fine in the history of the NFL, the maximum fine on an individual coach/GM permissible by league/union/CBA rules, and the biggest NFL draft forfeiture ever.

Stalions didn't do this once, but (allegedly) at least 30 times.
And that’s what I think some are missing.

Yes they broke 2 rules..

But they did that over 30 times.

So what’s the going rate for upwards of 60 broken rules?
 
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