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Whats your best pick up line??

Is that a mirror in your pocket? Because I can see myself in your pants.

Your father must have been a thief, because he stole all the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.

Girl, you've gotta be tired, because you've been running through my head all night long.

Wanna go back to my place for some pizza and sex? What, you don't like pizza?

Seriously, anybody that uses a pick-up line is just gay. They may not know it yet, but they are. Listen to Alan and Rugby if you guys want to pick up chicks. You have to be smart about it....here are a couple of rules to follow if you want to have a chance...the rest is up to you.

1. Don't use a pick-up line. Ever. (There are exceptions to this rule, but if you don't know them, they don't apply to you)

2. Don't be cheesy. Be yourself.

3. Be confident. This may be the most important rule. Chicks are greatly attracted to guys who are self-confident. This does not mean cocky. Chicks hate cocky guys.

4. Pick your battles. Hitting on a chick who is at the bar with 5 of her friends almost always results in failure, simply because her friend's won't allow her to leave with you...or them. (Again, there are exceptions to this rule, but see number 1)

5. Sense of humor is key. If you can keep a girl laughing, your battle is won.

6. Lie. Seriously. If you are a student, tell the chick you're in law school. If you work as an assistant, tell the chick you are your boss. If you like the chick that much, tell her the truth later. Chances are you'll wake up, realize what you've done, and chew your own arm off to get away from the chick without her waking up (note - this is called "Coyote Ugly", and occurs rather frequently. This is another reason to see number 3 below).

7. If you are that ugly, or that bad at picking up chicks, I suggest you go to sleazier bars and hit on drunker chicks.


Oh, and some things to avoid:

1. Dancing. Very few guys can actually dance. If you think you can, this rule especially applies to you, because you are probably wrong. The attention you receive on the dance floor is actually laughter, not admiration. (note - by dancing, I refer to any type of movement or participation on a dance floor when you do NOT have a female partner. Many chicks enjoy dancing with guys, and if you can keep your hands on the girls waist - see number 3 below - and keep yourself from falling, you may do so. But never, ever, dance by yourself)

2. Touching. Save it for later. If applied correctly, the hand in the small of the back or shoulder while letting the girl precede you through the door can work wonders...but most chicks prefer not to be groped, especially by a stranger.

3. Being obnoxiously drunk. (Note - if the girl is also throwing up, then you have bigger issues) Girls do not like to see a foul-mouthed drunkard starting fights.
 
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Your ass is so fine you make me want to convert to bootyism.

But really I went to a bar with some friends several years back. One of my buddies pointed to a girl and said "that chick will sleep with anyone." I was drunk and horny so I put her to the test. I walked over and said "My buddy told me to come over and ask you to have sex with me." After a few minutes of sweet talk she said yes.
 
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I'm definitely not the "pick-up" type, but if I were, the guy that set this up would have done just fine...

I passed up cable this fall and watched most of the games at the local sports bar. I’m not all that by any stretch of the imagination :roll2: , but there is apparently something about a woman who is there to actually watch football that presents a challenge… Let’s just say that having a bar full of Wisconsinites cheering on the Buckeyes makes for a fun evening. :biggrin:

Unfortunately, it was Northwestern. Not sure what expression I had at the end of the game, but it was sort of like the red sea parting to let me leave…

(yes I realize that's only marginally related to the topic but it's one of my best stories and I finally saw a chance to use it doggone it :p)
 
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"4. Pick your battles. Hitting on a chick who is at the bar with 5 of her friends almost always results in failure, simply because her friend's won't allow her to leave with you...or them. (Again, there are exceptions to this rule, but see number 1)"

so true fka.....and never hit on the prettiest one of the group either......

And to the part about being drunk....Herbstreit said it best one day: parashrase: Once a year the cities best of the best single women come out....and it's during the Memorial Tournament weekend. And what do the guys do, they show up and are slurring drunk by 11 a.m.. Let me tell ya, nothing impresses a quality woman more than seeing a man drunk in the morning.

one of the funniest things herbie ever said...
 
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How tall are you naked?

Want to play pool, darts or your game of choice. Loser has to have sex with the winner.

Lines don't work but as mentioned above a sense of humor with some confidence does.

I'm a big ugly but never lacked the confidence to go up and ask the best looking one to dance. Location is important also. Florida beach clubs, New Orleans clubs and country western bars anywhere seem to have a higher target ratio.

Depending on your age bracket there seems to be a place for every demographic. Our neighbor is divorced and she is always fillling my wife in on the activities at the local divorcee hangouts.

I'm old and married now so I don't participate in the ritual anymore.
 
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I don't know if you consider this a pick up line but I have to share. My old roommate at OSU had this trick he'd do when we'd go out, he'd go up to a hot chick at a bar and bet her $1 that he could make her tits move without touching them.

He would place his hands about 6-8 inches away from their tits and then act as if he was using the power of his mind to move them. After about 10 seconds of this "Mind control" no tit-moving bullshit, he'd just grab their tits and hand them the dollar.

Amazingly, he only got slapped once. Most girls were amused and it worked.
 
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i was hammered out of my gord one night at some dive bar in youngstown.

i walked up to this girl and here was the exact transaction:

me: can i buy you a drink?
her: i have a full one in my hand.
me: (resisting the immediate urge to make a penis comment, well, i'll buy myself one and then try to hook up with you.
her: my friend and i are going to dance, come meet me out there.
me: i'm not a good dancer.
her: why not?
me: well, i'm as good as a drunk white guy with two bad knees can be.
her: thats fine.
after muddling my way through a few songs.

her: that wasnt so bad.
me: thanks. you should really see me in bed, now that's where i'm a viking.
her: we'll just have to see about that.

end result: score one for slightly husky, poor dancing white boys everywhere.
 
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let one of her friends know you need a date to a formal/semi formal/date party... have her see if her friend is interested. If she isn't then too bad for her and try a different person. If she is, you know you're getting some during the date party... you also have her friends "ok" or she wouldn't have agreed to be a "match make.r" What you do before/after the date party is up to you :wink2:
 
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I'm married w/ 3 kids..never really a pick up specialist as I married my HS sweetheart. Other than the "does this rag smell like chloraf..." I like this one:

"I've got a 12 inch tongue and I breath through my ears."
 
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