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Reds Tidbits (2013 Season)

Watching these fuckheads last night and it came to me; "this is why the Special Olympics don't have marathon's."

Think about it, they always have retarded kids sprint a short distance and everyone cheers, the kid overcomes their disability for like 5-10 seconds and all is right with the world.Why? Because the kid is only required to not go full retard for like 5-10 seconds and has minimal distractions over a 40 yd course or whatever.

If you have a marathon all that goes out the window. The kid's going to go full tard at some point, if not many, along the long winding course stopping to lick bugs off a car window or some such shit.

So it is with the Reds. Over a short course they can sometimes overcome their handicap, look like the normal teams and get fans all happy about their basic ability to stay on the marked course and run forward without injury. Over the course of the marathon that is an MLB season however, they are going to stop and do some full tard bug licking.

So there we Reds fans sit. Perpetually watching our collection of Special Olympians lick bugs, chase puppies and shit themselves all over the fucking course while being told to enjoy the special moments when Corky can run in a straight goddamned line for 20-30 yards.

This little stretch at home against a sub.500 team is just the short straight line run for the Teds before the bug splattered window that is the next west coast road trip after the ASB.
 
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Oh by the way

"I just fucking walked a guy" t-shirts

ijustfckinwalkedaguyhomerbaileynohitter.jpg
 
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July 4 Podcast of MLBs Intentional Talk (7/3 episode) includes a Homer Bailey/Christian Bale Batman fake commercial for "The Red Knight" and interview with Todd Frazier. Videos aren't up on MLB.com yet though.

Frazier on having the last out chopped to him: "I got the ball and thought I was gonna chuck it into the stands, but like I told somebody, 'It's only an error, it's still a no-hitter.'"
 
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