Movie Team Dynasty Report

[Mark.May]

Auburn scores on a 15 yard bubble screen, breaking tackles along the way. 28-23 5:23 3rd.

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NglQJ278bZs"]YouTube - 3rd qtr pick6[/ame]

Beamen is pressued into a pick-6. 28-29 3rd.



Trying to stretch the lead to a FG, Auburn gambles and Miami gets a crucial 2 pt stop.

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xMx9Pyno1IE"]YouTube - 3rd qtr 2nd consecutive int[/ame]

Trying to hit the slant, Beamen is intercepted again on consecutive passing plays.

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EIiM3PN6rDY"]YouTube - 3rd qtr pressure ignored[/ame]



Miami hits the QBs arm, but the TD pass flies uninhibited. 28-36 Auburn in the 3rd.



Miami drives the length of the field, but gets stopped 1 yard short on 4th down.

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qZs4X5G2Iu8"]YouTube - 4th qtr sack[/ame]

Butkus favorite, LB Chris Jones comes up with a game-changing safety. 30-36 Auburn 6:08 4th.

[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VhCtvhaHig0"]YouTube - 4th qtr bogus drop[/ame]

Miami has the play & protection set up, but a bad throw and catch end their drive on downs. Auburn misses a 56 yd FG w/ 3:43 left.

Miami puts together a TD drive, punching it in with Beamen. 37-36 Miami 2:00 4th.



Auburn forced to pass, Chris Jones blitzes every down, picking up key sacks to end the drive.​

 

[jthorp24]

I love getting on here and reading about how much dumb shit happened in everyone else's games (I notice all the nonsense going on almost every play). Don't get me wrong this is my favorite game to play, but I just feel like too many games are decided on dumb plays.

 

[Abraham Simpson]

Okay, so since this week is a bye week for us, I had time to convince my granddaughter, Lisa, to teach me how to run some of this technological flim flam. This basically means that she did all the work while I ate applesauce and napped. So, without further ado, I now present you with Springfield's first set of video highlights.

That reminds me, when I was a kid we had a different name for highlights... we called them stars. Heck, we barely had electricity in many rural parts of Springfield. We mostly used candles for providing light when it was dark. Oh sure we had torches back then, but we liked to save those for lynchings and other assorted mob-related activities.

Now everyone knows that candles are made of wicks and wax. And everyone new back then that the best candle wax was sold at the Dipping Post, run by Lucinda Goosemore. Oh yes, it sure was a popular store that had a steady stream of business. Of course, it just so happened that Lucinda was Penny Sugarbottom's sister, so even though they appeared to run very different business, they really ran very much the same business.

Men came from all around to dip their wicks at her place. Many didn't even leave with a candle when they left.

Any ways, her business did really well until, ironically enough, her business burnt to the ground.

Speaking of smoldering messes, that reminds me of our game against Duke last week. We won, and that's all that matters. I keep telling myself that because I can't remember the score.

Here's another one of Stan Taylor's TD passes. The problem with this one is that he threw it to the wrong team.
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Aasnvgc8ZGs"]YouTube - DukeINTreturn[/ame]

And here's a 17 yard TD score by Steady Neddy.
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b6AFho2MZw4"]YouTube - Ned17[/ame]

Here's Duff Man taking back a kickoff 95 yards for a TD. Oh yeah!
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Kb2ozen8VM"]YouTube - Duff95[/ame]

Here's Taylor's TD pass to TE Hans "Hands" Moleman.
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=acIhhLQdZ4s"]YouTube - MolemanHans[/ame]

And here's Apu kicking a last second fiedgoal to rub in the win.
[ame="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oMyISJrTArw"]YouTube - thankyoukickagain[/ame]

And that concludes another exciting recap of ZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz...

 

[Abraham Simpson]

Well this week's game(s) were a weird experience. Kinda like the time a person gets old enough to realize they need to start wearing diapers again. Sorry to say though, there will be no video highlights this week of the games... or of me crapping my pants.

QB Stan Taylor did a great job of connecting with his receivers. He threw TD passes to 4 different targets (all on his own team for a change) and eclipsed the 300 yard mark. RB "Steady Neddy" Flanders rushed for over 100 yards and a score. Homer blocked so well for him that Ned promised to let him keep the drillbit he had borrowed last season and wasn't likely to return to him anyhow.

After being up 35-0 late in the game, I put in our backups. Backup QB Bart Simpson showed everyone exactly why he is destined to be a great offensive player... it's because he would otherwise make a terrible defensive player. After throwing 2 INTs, he was unable to takle either of the returners (I think he might have actually run away from them) and that gave the other team 14 easy points. Throw in a minor amount of comeback AI, and we were able to hold on for a 42 - 28 win.

I'm going to take a nap now. Whoops... I gotta change myself first though.

 

[Abraham Simpson]

So this is my 3rd consecutive post in this thread. It seems as though I'm just talking to myself. It kind of reminds the day I was left at the Old Folks Home. Oh it really wasn't a home, they just dropped me off at Walmart. I was told to give people carts when they walked in and to say "hello." So I did that. I'd talk all day to people and never get a response.

It was a tough game last against VA Tech. QB Stan Taylor was back to his old ways... he threw INTs on our first 3 possessions... at least 2 of them were in the red zone. Tech started off with a big lead. Their QB was deadly accurate and we weren't able to generate enough pass rush. And when we did, it usually resulted in a BS play. Several of the CPU's floater passes ended up being miraculous completions, a couple of which resulted in big plays, even touchdowns.

Despite of all of the disadvantages we faced, we put up a good fight. Todd Flanders started our scoring with a 100 yard kick return. Steady Neddy had 100 yards rushing and receiving, and went over 1,000 yards rushing on the season. Now then, having a thousand yard rusher might not be a big deal for many schools, but it is for us. We haven't seen that much running since the great Shine Run of the early 1930's.

Prohibition was quite popular in the US at that time, but we could still get our drink on in Springfield thanks in large part to the incompetent Police department led by Constable Wiggum. Of course, there were well known business owners that helped with the liquor running as well, such as Miss Sugarbottom. She of course had her businesses at the time and was able to sneak lots of the liquidy goodness in with the rest of her supplies.

She had a nice operation running, and whenever a law enforcement official found out about her smuggling, she'd offer up a couple of her girls to keep them quiet. This all worked very well until the feds were called in to put an end on all of the liquor running in Springfield. That's when they sent Agent Dillon Smithers to oversee the crack down.

Shortly after he arrived he figured that Miss Sugarbottom's business must have been the main gateway for the liquor. When he confronted her about it, she offered up some of her girls to keep him quiet, but he refused. So she then offered up the services of her stable boy, to which he accepted.

So when the stable boy met Agent Smithers and found out what type of "servicing" he had in mind, he became very scared and kicked Smithers "where the sun don't shine." Now then, the stable boy was a very strong lad and he kicked Smithers with such a force that Smithers was worried that he would die if he didn't get to a hospital quickly. That's when he ran 10 miles to the Springfield Hospital. And that's how it be came known as the great Shine Run of the early 1930's.

So thanks to Ned's great play were able to get back in the game. When Virginia Tech scored with just over a minute and a half left in the game to go up by 3, we knew it would be difficult to salvage a win. But on the ensuing kickoff, Duff Man went 90+ yards for the go ahead score.

So then we kicked off to VA Tech and they promptly demonstrated their unstoppable offense (thanks again to the friendly AI) and scored the game winning TD with 12 seconds left.

 

[Kirk Herbstreit]

QB Can't Throw, W Canaan vs Oklahoma
41-65 614yds 8 td 1 int 1 rush td

LB Chris Jones, Miami @ Auburn
14 tkl 9 tfl 5 sack 1 safety

HB Brian Little, Zissou @ UCLA
18 car 240 yd 5 td 2 rec 66 yds td

SS Michael Olsen, Gridiron Gang @ Ariz
13 tkl 7 tfl 3 sacks FF

LE Prisoner Taft, Mean Machine vs Col
10 tkl 5 tfl 5 sks ff vs CU

WR Jimmy Sanderson, Miami vs Tenn
7 rec 202 yds 4 td

 

[Mark.May]

Game of the Week, Wk 11: LSU vs Miami...

TE Jones gets the scoring started with a 15 yard TD reception...

Beamen stretches the lead to 14-0.

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ie0cH5U4dq4]YouTube - LSU 1 qtr INT TD[/ame]

A 3rd scoring drive is halted by a timely INT return.

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3RxuQO0DN78]YouTube - LSU FR TD[/ame]

A second consecutive drive ends in a defensive TD. 14-14.

After two Beamen TD runs & an LSU TD...

...Beamen finds Owens on a slant route to ice the game.

Champagne keeps the blowout going after halftime...

Ending with a 70-31 humilation for Les' damn strong football team.

 

[Mark.May]

LE Prisoner Taft, Mean Machine @ Missou
8 Tkl 3 Tfl 3 Sks, 1 FR

HB AC Slater, Bayside vs Cal
20 car 336 yds 5 td

 

[Coach D'Amato]

Coach, with the Michigan State upset of Penn State, the door appears to be opening for Miami to make a title run. What was your team's reaction to these turn of events?

Honestly Dana, we're focused on Hoover year round, and that's even more true now that game week is here. We aren't going to pull a Pete Carroll and let an inferior team spoil our season. We need to take care of business this week to make the CCG, both of which will take our complete focus. Talk to me in december about this.

 

[Mark.May]

After a season of build-up, this rivalry clash finally came and went, let's take a look back at the action:

A 3rd down conversion comes up short, as both sides come out a bit too amped up...

Hoover drives down the field, but Butkus winner Chris Jones comes up with a big sack on 1st & goal.

Hoover would still punch it in for the score. 7-0 Hoover.

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JwudREh9bpk]YouTube - 3 1st qtr td[/ame]

Miami answers on 3rd down, 7-7 early 2nd qtr.

Hoover's drive is stalled by a sack on 2nd & 2.

Miami drives, but is stopped on 3rd down.

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vpuZm_HHrrc]YouTube - Hoover 2nd qtr td[/ame]

Miami would tack on one more TD (FB run) before halftime to enter halftime up 21-7.

 

[Mark.May]

Whatever Hoover's staff did at halftime worked, because they came out on fire after the break, driving the length of the field through the air. 14-21 Miami.

However, Miami would answer with a long, methodical drive of their own, with the gods on their side:

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pMfC43DxjT0]YouTube - Hoover Broken Play[/ame]

and would later punch it in to convert on downs. 28-14 Miami.

Beamen added another TD to stretch the lead to 3 scores.

Hoover would answer with their aerial assault, cutting the lead to 35-21.

Miami recovered the onsides kick...

And rumbled into the endzone on 3rd down. 42-21.

After a desperation throw was intercepted...

Beamen would break free trying to run out the clock. 49-21 1:55.

 

[ESPN]

After a long and grueling season, it was finally time for the final post game presser for Coach Propst. He stepped out from the shadows and into the bright lights surrounding the podium, with a look of consternation and pure befuddlement on his face. He read through an obviously prewritten speech. It was poignant, it was classy, it was orderly. In short, it was not typical Rush Propst. The press picked up on it immediately.

"First off, let's give credit where credit is due. Miami played a hell of a game. Their offense proved to be unstoppable tonight, which is a real shame; because Andre (Battle) played a hell of a game. We put up 21 points, which should be enough to win. The defense just had a hard time getting a handle of Beamen."

"For our seniors, it's been a hell of a ride. Coming up from high school to college is no easy task. I will miss them being around here but I am also excited about the kids we got coming up."

"One last note, now that we've gone 5-7 we will miss the postseason. However, I will be here next season. I am not going anywhere. I will see Hoover back to the top where we belong. Any questions?"

"Coach, what did you think of Miami going for that fake field goal for a score late in the game?"

A now decently perturbed Propst: "Well, when D'Amato is on the sidelines, you can expect some funk things to happen. That is just one little thing in his myriad of tricks. We should've defended it better."

"And what of the passing Miami was doing on their final drives, how did it make you feel?"

"I'm not sure what you're gettin' at wit that question. How the hell do you think it made me feel?"

"I'm just statin--"

"To see my seniors already miserable because they lost out on a chance to extend the season, and then on top of that to have it rubbed in their faces by former professional players who should know better...how the fuck do you think that made me feel?"

"Well, Coach we di--"

"Goddamnit they don't deserve that treatment! Don't take out your hatred for me on my kids, D'Amato! Come at me! I'm a man! You and your former professional team crossed the line!"

Now literally fuming and getting many a dirty look from his athletic director, Prospt readjusts himself and tries to speak calmly.

"This presser is over, any further questions can be directly towards our wonderful AD. Have a great fucking day."

 

[Coach D'Amato]

Well, I'm happy to get out of that game fairly healthy and with a win. Hoover played hard and never gave up. That young QB of theirs is going to be a good'un. Earlier in the year, we were hoping their coach would continue playing the hapless veteran QB instead, because he did not scare our defense. This young kid is a gamer.

"Coach, what did you think of Miami going for that fake field goal for a score late in the game?"

Dodd, please send your interns to handle the big boy duties next time. That fake FG was our first TD of the game.

"To see my seniors already miserable because they lost out on a chance to extend the season, and then on top of that to have it rubbed in their faces by former professional players who should know better...how the [censored] do you think that made me feel?"

I'm in the business of winning footbal games, not handing out gold stickers and lollipops. Here I thought it was their job to get us off of the field, but now it is ours? Well, Coach Monroe - my DC - is a major coaching candidate. That's kind of you to set the stage for his hiring.

"Goddamnit they don't deserve that treatment! Don't take out your hatred for me on my kids, D'Amato! Come at me! I'm a man! You and your former professional team crossed the line!"

Then don't spy on mine.

 

[Mark.May]

Well that was entertaining, to say the least. Moving right along, here are our MVPs for this week:

QB Gee Grenouille 59-50 W @ LSU
34-56 573 yds 19 car 41 yds 5 td

MLB Scott Perez @ Missouri to finish .500
11 tkl 2 tfl sk, ff, 3 fr

 

[Rece Davis]

With a potential NC berth on the line for both teams, Tim Tebow led his favored gators against the upstart Sharks.

Miami has the best trio of receivers in the league, but it was the veteran backup who hauled in a 64 yd strike to open the game.

UF would chase him down and hold Miami to two consecutive FGs. 6-0 Miami.



[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C-RccU-pUa0]YouTube - Florida FF[/ame]

Demps tried to fly and was brought down to earth painfully...

Tebow dragged tacklers into the endzone on 3rd down. 7-6.

Miami chips in a third FG to take the lead 9-6.

After being stuffed on 3 plays inside the 5, Urban Meyer gets cocky and goes for it...

[ame=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uoIPNRK2SsU]YouTube - UF 4th & Goal Sack[/ame]

And is stopped behind the line of scrimmage.

Miami would punt the ball away with under a minute left. UF drove downfield...

And Jeff Demps broke tackles on a 23 yd TD catch and run. 9-14 UF with 0:05 left.