Man arrested for sex with picnic table

[Jake]

Okay, I'll cop to having had sex on a picnic table but this is ridiculous. :p

 

[Mike80]

I know it's a metal table, but that ruins the joke, so fuck it.

errr ummmm he kinda DID

 

[Buckeyeskickbuttocks]

The article said it was between 10:30 a.m. and noon on March 14th.

You had only 1 BP post between 10:42 a.m. and noon that day, so there was plenty of time for you to screw your table 4 times!

I have no further comment on these allegations. Please direct all further inquiries to my attorney.

My client would like to state unequivocally, he did not have sex with a picnic table 4 times.

 

[Jake]

My client would like to state unequivocally, he did not have sex with a picnic table 4 times.

In lawyer-speak that's like a confession to having had sex with the table 3 times.

 

[Buckeyeskickbuttocks]

In lawyer-speak that's like a confession to having had sex with the table 3 times.

I can assure you, my client did not have sex with a picnic table 3 times.

 

[Taosman]

"I did not have sex with that table!"
"I just rested my "cigar" in a couple holes!" :tongue2:

 

[Fungo Squiggly]

My client would like to state unequivocally, he did not have sex with a picnic table 4 times.

I can assure you, my client did not have sex with a picnic table 3 times.

Great posts. I agree.

 

[Buckeyeskickbuttocks]

Great posts. I agree.

You're not getting a reduced fee.

 

[Fungo Squiggly]

You're not getting a reduced fee.

Terrible post. I hate you.

 

[Buckeyeskickbuttocks]

Besides, the evidence will show my client is much more fond of lawn chairs generally, and may have even been courting one on the night in question.

 

[Buckeyeskickbuttocks]

Terrible post. I hate you.

10% off make you change your tune?

 

[Fungo Squiggly]

10% off make you change your tune?

Absolutely.

 

[Buckeyeskickbuttocks]

Absolutely.

Splendid. I recommend open G.

 

[Fungo Squiggly]

Splendid. I recommend open G.

I'll hum Air On a G String......but not yours.

 

[Buckeyeskickbuttocks]

I'll hum Air On a G String......but not yours.

Hmmm... maybe Open D is a better choice.