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- Thread starter sandgk
- Start date
For a guy that's been fired from every job he's had over the past decade, that is the way to fucking go down in a blaze of glory.
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Palpie
Legend
"Here's what's happening at Bama. Long story short, Lane Kiffin was a bad hire. He & his lovely wife are legally separated. She and the kids never moved here from Cali. As such, Lane has been knocking them down here in Tuscaloosa. And by them, I mean chicks and shots of gin & tonic.
One of the chicks he's hitting is the wife of a powerful Bama booster out of Mobile. He sends photos/videos to other members of the staff of him mashing her out. In short, Lane is a savage.
On top of that, he has a serious drinking problem. One of my partners that tends bar at the CopperTop tells me that Lane comes in all the time looking extra creepy. Waits for a certain chick to meet him there. Holds her hand and whispers in her ear the whole time while the bar is completely full. No discretion whatsoever. And he has had to be carried out several times. Also, a booster friend of mine in Georgia told me that this past spring, Lane showed up shit-faced at an Alumni Speaking engagement. The handlers had to take him and put him in the shower to try to sober him up. Kept over 400 people waiting for an hour, because he can't hold his liquor.
He also hates Coker's guts. Keep that in mind. Also, keep in mind that Coker's mom is one of those helicopter parents. Remember how she treated Jimbo year before last when Jaboo won the starting job over Jake? Keep that in mind. I'm coming back to that.
Now, if you all will remember, Lance Thompson (who is now at AU) got fired from here for banging Blake Barnett's mom. Lance has since married an heiress to the Hewlett-Packard fortune. Well, now, he's started to send cell phone screen shots to boosters and administrators showing where Lane set him and Blake's mom up. So that's blackmail #1.
The Mobile booster was gonna blow the lid off things, but he decided to take his old lady back. Well, in comes Coker's meddling ass mom. She's threatening to go to the newspaper about Lane's drinking and banging problem. Blackmail #2
Not that he was gonna be here a second longer after his contract was up after this season anyway, but Nick told Lane yesterday to go ahead and start looking for another job.
So, in my opinion, here's how this will end. Lane will coach his ass off the rest of the year and make Coker look like a competent QB. And he will leave to take over the job at The U after they fire Al Golden. And he will talk CASH....MONEY...shit on the way out the door."
One of the chicks he's hitting is the wife of a powerful Bama booster out of Mobile. He sends photos/videos to other members of the staff of him mashing her out. In short, Lane is a savage.
On top of that, he has a serious drinking problem. One of my partners that tends bar at the CopperTop tells me that Lane comes in all the time looking extra creepy. Waits for a certain chick to meet him there. Holds her hand and whispers in her ear the whole time while the bar is completely full. No discretion whatsoever. And he has had to be carried out several times. Also, a booster friend of mine in Georgia told me that this past spring, Lane showed up shit-faced at an Alumni Speaking engagement. The handlers had to take him and put him in the shower to try to sober him up. Kept over 400 people waiting for an hour, because he can't hold his liquor.
He also hates Coker's guts. Keep that in mind. Also, keep in mind that Coker's mom is one of those helicopter parents. Remember how she treated Jimbo year before last when Jaboo won the starting job over Jake? Keep that in mind. I'm coming back to that.
Now, if you all will remember, Lance Thompson (who is now at AU) got fired from here for banging Blake Barnett's mom. Lance has since married an heiress to the Hewlett-Packard fortune. Well, now, he's started to send cell phone screen shots to boosters and administrators showing where Lane set him and Blake's mom up. So that's blackmail #1.
The Mobile booster was gonna blow the lid off things, but he decided to take his old lady back. Well, in comes Coker's meddling ass mom. She's threatening to go to the newspaper about Lane's drinking and banging problem. Blackmail #2
Not that he was gonna be here a second longer after his contract was up after this season anyway, but Nick told Lane yesterday to go ahead and start looking for another job.
So, in my opinion, here's how this will end. Lane will coach his ass off the rest of the year and make Coker look like a competent QB. And he will leave to take over the job at The U after they fire Al Golden. And he will talk CASH....MONEY...shit on the way out the door."
Les Miles approves
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