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Headlines You Don't See Every Day (outside of Florida)

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Florida man shot a male doctor for making him cum during a prostate exam*

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*Yes, it's satire
 
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Bucklion said:
OMG @MililaniBuckeye it’s real!!!

California Lady-ninja takes down suspect at senior complex

https://apple.news/AVeCxaDvcT06-D3LOfPQh7w
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“He lifted up and tried to twist my hand. At the same time, I twisted his and turned it around real fast. He was saying, ‘You’re hurting me.’ And I said, ‘I don’t care. I don’t care what happens to you. You had no right to hurt an elderly person,’” Marrujo told a reporter.

“I had to bend his fingers back … to get him off her. He was screaming because that’s one of my techniques, the bent fingers. Then I went ‘boom’ with my elbow twice in his sternum,” she continued, according to The San Bernardino Sun.
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