"I'm drinking because of the terrible situation my favorite (and really only) sports team is in. I'm drinking because the death of Arizona basketball is upon us. I'm drinking like I lost a relative. I'm drinking because our last decent chance is gone. We will suck. And its probably going to be for a couple of years.
I'm drinking because we'll probably lose Nic Wise now. I'm drinking because we may lose Jamelle Horne now. I'm drinking because I don't even know if Garland Judkins is still in school. I'm drinking because we have no center next year. I'm drinking because we'll watch Arizona struggle to win a single Pac-10 game. I'm drinking because we've now whiffed on two head coaches who would have arrived with enough freshman to possibly keep the streak alive. I'm drinking because I don't have kids yet, but I may have a child who is walking and talking before the next time we make the tournament.
I'm drinking because Kentucky had the balls to pay for OUR coach. I'm drinking because Memphis (who plays in the C-USA) will get a better coach than us. I'm drinking because Alabama already got a better coach than us. I'm drinking because Georgia will get a better coach than us. I'm drinking because the days of counting Duke as a rival are over. I'm drinking because the days of counting Kansas as a rival are over. I'm drinking because the days of counting even Illinois as a rival are over.
I'm drinking because Arizona Basketball is part of what made the University cool and different..... now we'll just be a football school like everyone else. I'm drinking because McKale will be empty and I've never been to a basketball game there that wasn't sold out. I'm drinking because ASU is better than us now. I'm drinking because ASU doesn't care as much, but will still beat us. I'm drinking because 2001 is about to be 10 years away and there won't be another Final Four banner that decade. I'm drinking because I may have to watch an NIT game, and it won't be next year. I'm drinking because Oregon and Oregon State will beat us, and it won't be an upset that makes Sportscenter. I'm drinking because Seth Davis, Andy Katz, and Greg Doyle are probably enjoying this. I'm drinking because Seth Davis is going to look like he was right when he said the main candidate for the Arizona job was Reggie Theus. I'm drinking because I just had to type Reggie Theus.
I'm drinking because we may become Temple and talk about the "Don Cheney" days. I'm drinking because we may become Houston. I'm drinking because we may become Washington State from before Tony Bennett. I'm drinking because we won't be in the national media much anymore. I'm drinking because I won't be able to call my friends and talk about how exciting our recruiting class is. I'm drinking because I won't be able to fill out a bracket with Arizona in it for the first time in my life. I'm drinking because we won't really matter.
Most of all, I'm drinking because our athletic director had MONTHS to get an airtight plan, back up plan, contingency plan, and plan D together......and he didn't."