Favorite Simpsons quotes

[studepaber]

"Trying is the first step towards failure". - Homer
"They taste like burning." - Ralph (after eating poison berries)
"Mmmmmm....unexplained bacon."
"Mmmmmm....pistol whip."

Ahhh there's too many favorites.

 

[ScriptOhio]

http://images.art.com/images/products/regular/10282000/10282581.jpg

 

[MolGenBuckeye]

Homer: "Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try."

Ralph: "Hi, Super Nintendo Chalmers!"

 

[Fungo Squiggly]

Ralph: "Hi, Super Nintendo Chalmers!"

"...I'm learnding!!!"

Lisa: "That's not a very good message."
Slick Willy: "Well...I'm not a very good president."

 

[BayBuck]

The internet... They have that on computers now?

Carl: "I think I just logged onto my internet."



Young Carl: Have you heard about this inter-net thing?
Young Lenny: Internet?
Young Carl: Yeah, its the inner netting they invented to line swim trunks.

 

[BayBuck]

"...I'm learnding!!!"

Lisa: "That's not a very good message."
Slick Willy: "Well...I'm not a very good president."

or, "Hey, I'm a pretty lousy president"

 

[Fungo Squiggly]

or, "Hey, I'm a pretty lousy president"

Damn! I've never been good with exact quotes. At least it was close-ish. :tongue2:

 

[redskinbucksfan]

Barney: My name is Barney Gumble, and I'm an alcoholic.

Lisa: Mr. Gumble, this is a girl scout meeting.

Barney: Or is it that you girls just can't admit that you have a problem?

 

[Zurp]

"Did I say 'Corpse Hatch'? I meant 'Innocence Tube'."

 

[scooter1369]

Homer: Don't blame me, I voted for Kang.

 

[Fungo Squiggly]

Lionel Hutz: Well, he's kind of had it in for me ever since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace "accidentally" with "repeatedly," and replace "dog" with "son."

 

[Zurp]

Homer: Don't blame me, I voted for Kang.

That one was great. But it was even funnier when someone had the idea to vote for an independant, third party candidate. And one of the aliens says, "Sure... throw your vote away!!!" Everyone in the crowd grumbles, and Ross Perot just punches his hat.

 

[BayBuck]

A great site with lyrics to all the Simpsons songs:
http://www.snpp.com/guides/lyrics_list.html


You'll never stop the Simpsons,
Have no fears, we've got stories for years like...

Marge becomes a robot,
Maybe Moe gets a cell phone,
Has Bart ever owned a bear or...

How about a crazy wedding?
Where something happens, and do-do do-do-do
Sorry for the clip show!
Have no fears, we've got stories for years!

 

[buckeyegrad]

Let's not forget about old grandpa:

Grandpa: Dear Mr. President, There are too many states nowadays. Please eliminate three. P.S. I am not a crackpot.

Marge: Grandpa, this flag only has 49 stars on it
Grandpa: I'll be deep in the cold, cold ground before I recognize Missourah!

Grandpa: Big deal! When I was a pup, we got spanked by presidents 'til the cows came home! Grover Cleveland spanked me on two non-consecutive occasions!

Grandpa: Well, whenever I'm confused, I just check my underwear. It holds the answer to all the important questions.

Grandpa Simpson: The last time the meteors came, we thought the sky was on fire. Naturally, we blamed the Irish. We hanged more 'n a few.

Lisa: Didn't you find it odd that you were receiving checks in the mail for no particular reason?
Grandpa: I thought it was because the Democrats were in power.

 

[tibor75]

Hapu: "tibor, I'm your father..."

Who is Hapu? Apu's child that was aborted in the womb? I think that was the secret episode that was never aired...