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Favorite Simpsons quotes


Don't Immanentize the Eschaton
Staff member
There are too many quotes to list them all, so I guess I'll just pick one character for now and add later:

Lionel Hutz:

"This is the greatest case of false advertising I've seen since I sued the movie The Never Ending Story."

"Well, he's kind of had it in for me ever since I accidentally ran over his dog. Actually, replace 'accidentally' with 'repeatedly, and replace 'dog' with 'son.'"

Lionel Hutz: Well, I didn't win. Here's your pizza."
Marge: "But we did win."
Lionel Hutz: "That's okay. The box is empty."
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It ain't easy, bein' cheesy.
"No TV and no beer make Homer something something."

"I'm having the best day of my life, and I owe it all to not going to church."

Ralph Wiggam
"Me fail english? That's unpossible."

You're right, there are WAY to many to even begin narrowing it down.
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Pimp Minister Sinister
From the Homer/Astronaught Episode:

Peg Bundy (on TV): "Al, lets have sex."
Al Bundy: "Ehhhhhhh, no Peg."

Chief Wiggum, in the Lisa/Babysitter Episode:

Lisa: "Goodbye Chief, have a good time at Bob Sagat."
Wiggum: "Nooo, its Bob Seger .. (looks at tickets) ... Awww, crap!!"

Homer, in the Apu/Valentine Episode:

"We gotta get that traitor Apu! Right after Happy Hour."
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Fired up! Ready to go!
Apu: "Yes! I am a citizen! Now which way to the welfare office? I'm kidding, I'm kidding, I work, I work!"

Homer: "I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals flaming."

Homer: "Homer: No offense Apu, but when they're handing out religions you must be out taking a whizz."
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I give up. This board is too hard to understand.
"Unfortunately, son, we Simpsons sometimes have to bend the rules a little in order to hold our own."

"Don't let Krusty's death get you down, boy. People die all the time, just like that. Why, you could wake up dead tomorrow! Well, good night.
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Don't Immanentize the Eschaton
Staff member

Helen Lovejoy: We demand you bring in a police chief who will enforce the Prohibition law!

Myor Quimby: Demand? Who are you to demand? I run this city. You're just a bunch of low-income nobodies!

Aid: Uh, election in November. Election in November.

Mayor Quimby: What? Again? This stupid country!
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