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I was the son of a steel worker who didn't work the whole year. Mom had to go to work to keep food on the table. We had "one pot" meals twice a week. Spaghetti night was the highlight of the week for us three kids! So, an elf or two would have been quite the extravagance for that household! But, it's all good.
Spaghetti night?! You were lucky to have a pot! We used to have to eat "no pot" meals five times a week, so we juat ate dirt and drink a glass of sour unpasteurized milk. and when we did get one pot, it was filled with shoelaces and ketchup buried under 2 feet of snow that we'd have to walk 3miles up a hill to get to. Both ways!
But you try and tell the young people today that... and they won't believe ya, then they'll push you down, break your hip and steal your Social Security check and buy crack.
Broken.So.. walking the kid to school today.
Run into a little boy from her Grade... and he's yapping about whatever, walking down the street, and he's like "Our Elf on the shelf is back, My mom says... " (blah blah blah). And he's walking with his Dad, whose eyes are fixed downward on the pavement, shoulders hunched forward, not a word to be spoken.
Poor bastard.
So.. walking the kid to school today.
Run into a little boy from her Grade... and he's yapping about whatever, walking down the street, and he's like "Our Elf on the shelf is back, My mom says... " (blah blah blah). And he's walking with his Dad, whose eyes are fixed downward on the pavement, shoulders hunched forward, not a word to be spoken.
Poor bastard.
Broken.
Yeah, but that guy, he was broken already. If my kid starts bragging to you about the cool stuff our elf has been doing the last few nights, you'll get a bemused eye-roll from me, but certainly not shame. So my wife likes instagramming silly pictures of it to her cousins, and the kids like the seek-and-find every morning, and I'm only out $20. I do think trying to make the Elf a part of the Santa mythology is just plain wrong, so we don't play that up at all (No touching?? It's a toy!), we just make a game of it. It makes my girls happy, and that's fine by me.
Elf on the Shelf?
Never heard of it until this year--an unexpected benefit for giving up Christmas about 8 years ago.
Look, everytime I get annoyed with Christmas, I think about the manifold excuses for drinking way more booze than I do most of the rest of the year... then its fine. I like to give gifts, I like to get gifts, its commercial, its THE AMERICAN WAY! Santa Claus is drunk, I'm drunk... everything is good. I don't mind ritual, pagan or otherwise. I usually get to fry a turkey, which, with enough booze has a certain element of danger to it.