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Worst Xmas gift you received this year!!

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Thump said:
I thought I'd opened the wrong present for awhile.
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My wife and I went to her parents on Christmas Eve to exchange gifts. We have to go when the rest of the family isn't around because her brothers get jealous of how much she gets. Her father was passing out presents and hands me a gift bag. It has a bottle of hair gel, some body spray, and a pack of those Michael Jordan wrist bands (like the Livestrong things). I didn't know what to think. Her mom wasn't paying attention and didn't see what I opened. What the hell was I going to do with this stuff? I don't even know if I said anything. Just then, I happened to see the tag on the bag. Their grandson has the same name as me but it said from "Grandma and Grandpa". Talk about relief.
 
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I'm not sure if this is the worst or best gift, but my friend/roommate (rent-free I might add), who is both an OSU and ND fan (loves the Buckeyes but father and sister went to ND) and who happens to post on this site occasionally as acexline (feel free to ding the shit out of him), informed me on Monday when we were watching the replay of the Michigan game (the first time he had had a chance to see it since he was out of the country in November) that for a belated Xmas/birthday gift he would be getting me a Pitcock jersey which he planned to rip up with scissors before giving it to me, to signify the hundreds of times Quinn was held by one or more of the opposition's lineman this season and the hundreds of times I yelled at the refs through the TV to throw a flag. Fortunately, for the bowl game (when I will be sporting said tattered Pitcock jersey) he and his sister will be outnumbered at my place about 15 to 2...
 
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My fiance got me 4 shirts from the Gap that don't fit and a wall mounted pot rack for our new house. Problem is I already bought one of these for $50 (usually $200) :p last summer at a store that was going out of business

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Needless to say she was pissed at my reaction to her gift. I made it perfectly obvious that I wanted this watch when she was picking out a watch for her brother before Christmas.
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ScarletInMyVeins said:
Hell Wes, since you're so generous, could I live with you rent free too?
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there's no furniture in my place right now so you'll have to just pull up some floor...

Two weeks ago when I was in NY I had dinner with a bunch of guys I played rugby with. One guy is originally from Texas and is a cowboy at heart. He is now living with this gorgeous blueblood broad he has been dating for a couple of years up in Connecticut and they had decided to exchange gifts early. After he gave her her gift, she disappeared for about an hour. He sat watching TV. Finally he realized she was in the bathroom crying...for the last hour. We all asked him in unison, "What the hell did you get her?"

His response?

"Cheese."

He was dead serious...
 
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Not to bring up asininity again, but I'd like to point something out.

I am 6'4", and weigh 240 pounds. Ok, ok, maybe 245. But the point is, I wear XL. Yes, XL. Not XXL. TG05, if you think your scrawny 100 pounds less than me ass doesn't look like a fool in XXL, then I applaud your ignorance.
 
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