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- Thread starter MD Buckeye
- Start date
Bucknut24
Trolololol
tired of people telling me because I'm a Bengals fan, I can't hate on Cincinnati (the city or anything else)
no matter, can't stand the fans in Cincinnati, and even a lot of Bengals fan piss me off
Never forget a few years ago when Santonio Holmes scored a long TD in OT against Pitt, and as he's running, all the bengals fans were doing the gator chomp...fucking assholes
no matter, can't stand the fans in Cincinnati, and even a lot of Bengals fan piss me off
Never forget a few years ago when Santonio Holmes scored a long TD in OT against Pitt, and as he's running, all the bengals fans were doing the gator chomp...fucking assholes
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Screw that, I'm a neanderthal.
http://www.sci-news.com/otherscienc...neanderthal-genes-modern-human-dna-01734.html
http://www.sci-news.com/otherscienc...neanderthal-genes-modern-human-dna-01734.html
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I've recently figured something out. I never used to hate Cincinnati, ND, Reds, Miami (OH), OU, etc until I moved back to Ohio. Now I can't stand any of them because of their stupid fucking fans (no offense to fans of those teams here :))
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MaliBuckeye
1) Be A Man.
Quick question- I'm looking for a video clip or gif of the offensive pass interference against Johnny Holton when he and Eli were handfighting. Huge momentum shift.
Any help?
Any help?
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Honor&Glory
Paper,Rock, Scissors, Lizard, Spock!
this made me laugh out loud. My wife asked what was so damn funny and with no way to really explain it I just said 'midget porn'.
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I think I remember that guy. Funny name. Didn't he get kicked out of Florida State for stealing a moped, transferred to Auburn, then got drafted by the Browns?
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I know I hate them because of their stupid fucking fans I'm around now. I thought I made that clear?
The only reason I don't hate the Browns is that I stupidly threw in with that train wreck years ago.
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Honor&Glory
Paper,Rock, Scissors, Lizard, Spock!
go read the Reds thread...there is a reason its the funniest thread of any fan base on the internet.
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TheStoicPaisano
But I didn't, so it doesn't
Leviticus hails from the same school that produced Lion King Conaway (and Lawrence Marshall and Malik McDowell).
Silverberry' younger bro is a true frosh at UC. His name? Kevin. Of course.
Also, is Worley injured? He's a starter on special units and was MIA yesterday.
Silverberry' younger bro is a true frosh at UC. His name? Kevin. Of course.
Also, is Worley injured? He's a starter on special units and was MIA yesterday.
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Story time!
So on a whim I decided to drive the 6 hours to Columbus for the game last night without tickets. I've heard from people who live locally that you can buy from a scalper 10 min or so before kickoff and get super cheap tickets in decent locations. Since it was a night game, I could drive out Saturday morning and only have to stay over Saturday night, then drive back Sunday. Here's a quick rundown of what happened:
- Tried to book on priceline for the hotel. The quoted price was $115 for the night. Click the link....HAHA just kidding, it's now $133 plus tax, so $150 something. Fuck you priceline, I'm going to use the "I'm not going to tell you what hotel it is, but you can save money so it's probably going to be a shit hole" option. I find a deal for the same area, same number of stars, for $80. Boom.....same hotel. Suck a dick, priceline.
- The drive out was fine, no issues. As I'm pulling in to the parking lot I hear on the radio that Troy Smith, who is in town to be inducted into the OSU HOF during the game, will be signing autographs in a lot near the stadium. Sure enough, there's a line starting to form when we get there. Stood in line for about 20 minutes and got to meet one of my favorite Buckeyes ever. I got 2 mini helmets signed, so Christmas for my brother is done already.
- While waiting in line I check my phone to see Penn State getting whooped early.
- I checked with my first scalper. He wants $200 each for D Deck seats. No thanks, dickhead. He tells me nobody is selling. I'm a little worried. I could have gotten seats in 22C from a guy on here, but it was row 34 of 41 and I thought I could get similar or better for below face value by waiting until right before kickoff.
- I check the Penn State score again. LOL.
- Walking around a bit more and it's getting closer to kickoff. I check with another scalper...he wants $250 for a pair in 18C. I almost bite. I'm nervous about driving 6 hours and not getting in, but that price is still too high for fucking Cincinnati.
- Get a text from my brother "the honeymoon is over". I know this means Penn State lost. Glorious.
- We regroup in a CVS and I decide we'll walk down the street a bit. If we can't beat that price I'll bite the bullet and cut my losses. Here's where it gets good.
- I come across the sketchiest looking guy I've ever seen selling tickets at an OSU game. That's saying something right there. He wasn't dangerous sketchy...more like homeless sketchy. He might have had 4 bottom teeth...one of them had a hole in the middle of it. He was a bigger guy, both height and weight. But he was jovial and kind of charming. He's on the phone, but also trying to work the crowd. I just want to see where his seats are. He tells me "they're the best seats you've ever seen in your life". Well I can't afford that shit, I start to walk away. He hits on my wife. Again, in a funny kind of way, not threatening or anything like that. I ask him where...he tells me 17A row 1. I walk away again. I can't afford these. She stops to see how much. He says he paid "eighty four fifty" for them, but he wants to make a little. Since I've already written this off, my brain processes that as $850. The wife wife says "How about $200 for the pair." If I wasn't half convinced this guy was homeless, I would have been embarrassed by how much of a low ball offer that is. He replies with, "I wanted $250, but you have a pretty face. $225."
OK. This guy is bogus. For comparison's sake, Ohio State's next home game against Rutgers is October 18th. Seats in 18A row 2 on stubhub (closest comparison) are $374. Each. 17A row 12 on the OSU ticket resale website are $570. EACH.
I take a quick peak at the tickets again. I thought I noticed the bottom half where the barcode would be was already ripped off as if they had already been scanned and ripped by the ticket taker. I'm over this guy. I start to walk again. She stays. Then my idiot portion of my brain takes over and really wants to sit in section 17A row 1. I cave. I know I have exactly $205 in my wallet. I get the other $20 from the wife and hand it to him. He tells me to count it. Now this feels like an undercover cop. I don't know the laws of scalping tickets. I don't know if the guy buying scalped tickets can get in trouble...but at this moment I feel like a guy buying drugs and the undercover cop is just trying to confirm that money is trading hands before they swarm me.
I count it out and hand it to him. He counts it out again, out loud. OK. This is definitely a UC. I'm going to jail soon. He hands me the tickets, shakes my hand, tells me I "better take good fucking care of her", and we go our separate ways. I double, triple, quadruple check these tickets to see if they are both for the same section/row...if they're really side by side...if they're even for this game. They look legit. We duck into McD's to piss before heading to the stadium. I take the opportunity to text my brother and tell him I probably just paid $225 for fake tickets. I'm silently blaming my wife for not picking up on my clues that these are bogus...but it's my fault. I have the money. I have the knowledge of what these seats should cost.
The more I think about this transaction, the more I know these tickets were probably used, passed through the gate, and just resold to me. I decide if we don't get in, I'm going to re-sell them to another scalper. I wouldn't sell them to a poor sap like me, but ripping off a scalper doesn't make me feel too bad. I know he's just going to turn around and screw somebody else, but that can't be helped.
I get to the stadium with both tickets. We didn't have time to go back to the car to drop off the souvenirs we've amassed. The bag checker looks in half assed, lets me go. Stops the wife bc she has a purse. I don't even care....I'm sweating bullets. The guy with the little machine that scans the tickets and makes that noise holds his little machine out. It scans. It beeps. It was a different beep than I've ever heard. The jig is up. I look around to see where he would like me to stand while I wait for the police to come take me away. The ticket guy looks up at me without saying a word. Then nothing happens. He's still looking at me. Was he getting ready to tell me they have already been scanned and are no good? No....he's wondering why I'm still fucking standing there. I have him scan the other ticket for my wife who finally makes it through the bag check. It beeps again. He doesn't say a word.
This is where I sat for $225.
The section right in front of us was where the parents sit. Ezekiel Elliots family was one row away. Every recruit at the game was somewhere down there where that lady with the awful red wig is. Bradley Roby (Broncos on the bye week) walked right past there after the game.
- Get to the hotel at 11pm, they have no rooms because a huge group of people didn't leave on time so none of them are clean. Wait.......what's that? Oh, one just opened up for us? We'll take it. Can I get a list of pizza places that deliver this late? Awesome, thanks. I went to get the pizza 30 mins later and the lobby was filled with about 30 pissed off people who had no room available to them.
-=TL;DR=-
- Cheap hotel
- Meet Troy Smith
- Penn State loses
- AMAZING seats crazy cheap from a hobo
- Hotel finds a room out of thin air
- I literally could do no wrong yesterday
So on a whim I decided to drive the 6 hours to Columbus for the game last night without tickets. I've heard from people who live locally that you can buy from a scalper 10 min or so before kickoff and get super cheap tickets in decent locations. Since it was a night game, I could drive out Saturday morning and only have to stay over Saturday night, then drive back Sunday. Here's a quick rundown of what happened:
- Tried to book on priceline for the hotel. The quoted price was $115 for the night. Click the link....HAHA just kidding, it's now $133 plus tax, so $150 something. Fuck you priceline, I'm going to use the "I'm not going to tell you what hotel it is, but you can save money so it's probably going to be a shit hole" option. I find a deal for the same area, same number of stars, for $80. Boom.....same hotel. Suck a dick, priceline.
- The drive out was fine, no issues. As I'm pulling in to the parking lot I hear on the radio that Troy Smith, who is in town to be inducted into the OSU HOF during the game, will be signing autographs in a lot near the stadium. Sure enough, there's a line starting to form when we get there. Stood in line for about 20 minutes and got to meet one of my favorite Buckeyes ever. I got 2 mini helmets signed, so Christmas for my brother is done already.
- While waiting in line I check my phone to see Penn State getting whooped early.
- I checked with my first scalper. He wants $200 each for D Deck seats. No thanks, dickhead. He tells me nobody is selling. I'm a little worried. I could have gotten seats in 22C from a guy on here, but it was row 34 of 41 and I thought I could get similar or better for below face value by waiting until right before kickoff.
- I check the Penn State score again. LOL.
- Walking around a bit more and it's getting closer to kickoff. I check with another scalper...he wants $250 for a pair in 18C. I almost bite. I'm nervous about driving 6 hours and not getting in, but that price is still too high for fucking Cincinnati.
- Get a text from my brother "the honeymoon is over". I know this means Penn State lost. Glorious.
- We regroup in a CVS and I decide we'll walk down the street a bit. If we can't beat that price I'll bite the bullet and cut my losses. Here's where it gets good.
- I come across the sketchiest looking guy I've ever seen selling tickets at an OSU game. That's saying something right there. He wasn't dangerous sketchy...more like homeless sketchy. He might have had 4 bottom teeth...one of them had a hole in the middle of it. He was a bigger guy, both height and weight. But he was jovial and kind of charming. He's on the phone, but also trying to work the crowd. I just want to see where his seats are. He tells me "they're the best seats you've ever seen in your life". Well I can't afford that shit, I start to walk away. He hits on my wife. Again, in a funny kind of way, not threatening or anything like that. I ask him where...he tells me 17A row 1. I walk away again. I can't afford these. She stops to see how much. He says he paid "eighty four fifty" for them, but he wants to make a little. Since I've already written this off, my brain processes that as $850. The wife wife says "How about $200 for the pair." If I wasn't half convinced this guy was homeless, I would have been embarrassed by how much of a low ball offer that is. He replies with, "I wanted $250, but you have a pretty face. $225."
OK. This guy is bogus. For comparison's sake, Ohio State's next home game against Rutgers is October 18th. Seats in 18A row 2 on stubhub (closest comparison) are $374. Each. 17A row 12 on the OSU ticket resale website are $570. EACH.
I take a quick peak at the tickets again. I thought I noticed the bottom half where the barcode would be was already ripped off as if they had already been scanned and ripped by the ticket taker. I'm over this guy. I start to walk again. She stays. Then my idiot portion of my brain takes over and really wants to sit in section 17A row 1. I cave. I know I have exactly $205 in my wallet. I get the other $20 from the wife and hand it to him. He tells me to count it. Now this feels like an undercover cop. I don't know the laws of scalping tickets. I don't know if the guy buying scalped tickets can get in trouble...but at this moment I feel like a guy buying drugs and the undercover cop is just trying to confirm that money is trading hands before they swarm me.
I count it out and hand it to him. He counts it out again, out loud. OK. This is definitely a UC. I'm going to jail soon. He hands me the tickets, shakes my hand, tells me I "better take good fucking care of her", and we go our separate ways. I double, triple, quadruple check these tickets to see if they are both for the same section/row...if they're really side by side...if they're even for this game. They look legit. We duck into McD's to piss before heading to the stadium. I take the opportunity to text my brother and tell him I probably just paid $225 for fake tickets. I'm silently blaming my wife for not picking up on my clues that these are bogus...but it's my fault. I have the money. I have the knowledge of what these seats should cost.
The more I think about this transaction, the more I know these tickets were probably used, passed through the gate, and just resold to me. I decide if we don't get in, I'm going to re-sell them to another scalper. I wouldn't sell them to a poor sap like me, but ripping off a scalper doesn't make me feel too bad. I know he's just going to turn around and screw somebody else, but that can't be helped.
I get to the stadium with both tickets. We didn't have time to go back to the car to drop off the souvenirs we've amassed. The bag checker looks in half assed, lets me go. Stops the wife bc she has a purse. I don't even care....I'm sweating bullets. The guy with the little machine that scans the tickets and makes that noise holds his little machine out. It scans. It beeps. It was a different beep than I've ever heard. The jig is up. I look around to see where he would like me to stand while I wait for the police to come take me away. The ticket guy looks up at me without saying a word. Then nothing happens. He's still looking at me. Was he getting ready to tell me they have already been scanned and are no good? No....he's wondering why I'm still fucking standing there. I have him scan the other ticket for my wife who finally makes it through the bag check. It beeps again. He doesn't say a word.
This is where I sat for $225.
The section right in front of us was where the parents sit. Ezekiel Elliots family was one row away. Every recruit at the game was somewhere down there where that lady with the awful red wig is. Bradley Roby (Broncos on the bye week) walked right past there after the game.
- Get to the hotel at 11pm, they have no rooms because a huge group of people didn't leave on time so none of them are clean. Wait.......what's that? Oh, one just opened up for us? We'll take it. Can I get a list of pizza places that deliver this late? Awesome, thanks. I went to get the pizza 30 mins later and the lobby was filled with about 30 pissed off people who had no room available to them.
-=TL;DR=-
- Cheap hotel
- Meet Troy Smith
- Penn State loses
- AMAZING seats crazy cheap from a hobo
- Hotel finds a room out of thin air
- I literally could do no wrong yesterday
Upvote
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