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ScriptOhio
Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.
A Shark Tale
Why do Sharks swim circles around you before attacking?
Two great white sharks, swimming in the ocean, spied survivors of a sunken ship.
"Follow me, son." the father shark said to the son shark and they swam to the mass of people.
"First we swim around them a few times with just the tip of our fins showing." And they did.
"Well done, son! Now we swim around them a few more times with all of our fins showing." And they did.
"Now we eat everybody." And they did.
When they were both gorged, the son asked, "Dad, why didn't we just eat them all at first?
Why did we swim around and around them?
His wise father replied, "Because they taste better without the s.h.i.t inside!"
Why do Sharks swim circles around you before attacking?
Two great white sharks, swimming in the ocean, spied survivors of a sunken ship.
"Follow me, son." the father shark said to the son shark and they swam to the mass of people.
"First we swim around them a few times with just the tip of our fins showing." And they did.
"Well done, son! Now we swim around them a few more times with all of our fins showing." And they did.
"Now we eat everybody." And they did.
When they were both gorged, the son asked, "Dad, why didn't we just eat them all at first?
Why did we swim around and around them?
His wise father replied, "Because they taste better without the s.h.i.t inside!"
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ScriptOhio
Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.
buckeyeintn;1803696; said:
For a dozen Big Macs scUM could easily get a new head coach:
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ScriptOhio
Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.
The Final Exam
The Final Exam At Penn State University, there were four sophomores taking chemistry and all of them had an 'A' so far. These four friends were so confident that the weekend before finals, they decided to visit some friends and have a big party. They had a great time but, after all the hearty partying, they slept all day Sunday and didn't make it back to Penn State until early Monday morning.
Rather than taking the final as scheduled, they decided that after the final they would explain to their professor why they missed it. They said that they visited friends but on the way back they had a flat tire. As a result, they missed the final. The professor agreed they could make up the final the next day. The guys were excited and relieved. They studied that night for the exam.
The next day the Professor placed them in separate rooms and gave them a test booklet. They quickly answered the first problem worth 5 points. Cool, they thought! Each one in separate rooms, thought this was going to be easy...then they turned the page. On the second page was written...
For 95 points: Which tire? _________
The Final Exam At Penn State University, there were four sophomores taking chemistry and all of them had an 'A' so far. These four friends were so confident that the weekend before finals, they decided to visit some friends and have a big party. They had a great time but, after all the hearty partying, they slept all day Sunday and didn't make it back to Penn State until early Monday morning.
Rather than taking the final as scheduled, they decided that after the final they would explain to their professor why they missed it. They said that they visited friends but on the way back they had a flat tire. As a result, they missed the final. The professor agreed they could make up the final the next day. The guys were excited and relieved. They studied that night for the exam.
The next day the Professor placed them in separate rooms and gave them a test booklet. They quickly answered the first problem worth 5 points. Cool, they thought! Each one in separate rooms, thought this was going to be easy...then they turned the page. On the second page was written...
For 95 points: Which tire? _________
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Nicknam4
Pootis
ScriptOhio;1803803; said:The Final Exam At Penn State University, there were four sophomores taking chemistry and all of them had an 'A' so far. These four friends were so confident that the weekend before finals, they decided to visit some friends and have a big party. They had a great time but, after all the hearty partying, they slept all day Sunday and didn't make it back to Penn State until early Monday morning.
Rather than taking the final as scheduled, they decided that after the final they would explain to their professor why they missed it. They said that they visited friends but on the way back they had a flat tire. As a result, they missed the final. The professor agreed they could make up the final the next day. The guys were excited and relieved. They studied that night for the exam.
The next day the Professor placed them in separate rooms and gave them a test booklet. They quickly answered the first problem worth 5 points. Cool, they thought! Each one in separate rooms, thought this was going to be easy...then they turned the page. On the second page was written...
For 95 points: Which tire? _________
That's actually really good haha.
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ScriptOhio
Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.
They are airlifting stranded cruise ship passengers Spam:
Passengers await help on crippled cruise ship
SAN DIEGO ? The nearly 4,500 passengers and crew of the arnival Splendor have no air conditioning or hot water. Running low on food, they have to eat canned crab meat and Spam dropped in by helicopters. And for at least another 24 hours, they have no way out.
What began as a seven-day cruise to the picturesque Mexican Riviera stopped around sunrise when an engine room fire cut power to the 952-foot vessel and set it adrift off Mexico's Pacific coast.
No one was hurt and, by Tuesday, U.S. Navy helicopters were ferrying 70,000 pounds of supplies, including the crab meat, croissants, Pop Tarts, Spam and other items, to the stricken ship.
Mexican tugboats, meanwhile, were rushing out to the vessel to begin towing it 150 miles to the port of [COLOR=#366388 !important][COLOR=#366388 !important]Ensenada[/COLOR][/COLOR], about 50 miles south of the U.S.-Mexico border. The Splendor could reach the port as early as late Wednesday.
Entire article: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20101110/ap_on_bi_ge/us_cruise_ship_fire
Passengers await help on crippled cruise ship
SAN DIEGO ? The nearly 4,500 passengers and crew of the arnival Splendor have no air conditioning or hot water. Running low on food, they have to eat canned crab meat and Spam dropped in by helicopters. And for at least another 24 hours, they have no way out.
What began as a seven-day cruise to the picturesque Mexican Riviera stopped around sunrise when an engine room fire cut power to the 952-foot vessel and set it adrift off Mexico's Pacific coast.
No one was hurt and, by Tuesday, U.S. Navy helicopters were ferrying 70,000 pounds of supplies, including the crab meat, croissants, Pop Tarts, Spam and other items, to the stricken ship.
Mexican tugboats, meanwhile, were rushing out to the vessel to begin towing it 150 miles to the port of [COLOR=#366388 !important][COLOR=#366388 !important]Ensenada[/COLOR][/COLOR], about 50 miles south of the U.S.-Mexico border. The Splendor could reach the port as early as late Wednesday.
Entire article: http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20101110/ap_on_bi_ge/us_cruise_ship_fire
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ScriptOhio
Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.
Call The Police
Police called to investigate noise find lone jiggling vibrator
Police called to a flat in Berlin by neighbours who said it sounded like someone was using an electric drill through the night smashed down the door to find a vibrator had switched itself on and was jiggling around on the floor.
Officers who answered the desperate call of the neighbour tried repeatedly to contact the 23-year-old woman whose flat it was, according to a report in the Berlin Kurier on Saturday.
But they could not get a response, and eventually decided to break in the door in an attempt to find out what was going on in the flat.
?You could hear the noise out on the street,? one neighbour was quoted as saying.
When the officers smashed their way into the flat they found nothing more dangerous than the vibrator which was doing its best on the floor.
Now the young woman is not only going to have to face her neighbours when she returns home ? she will also have to pay for the smashed door, the paper said.
http://www.thelocal.de/society/20110423-34585.html
Just think. If she lived in the US she could sue the maker of the vibrator.
Police called to investigate noise find lone jiggling vibrator
Police called to a flat in Berlin by neighbours who said it sounded like someone was using an electric drill through the night smashed down the door to find a vibrator had switched itself on and was jiggling around on the floor.
Officers who answered the desperate call of the neighbour tried repeatedly to contact the 23-year-old woman whose flat it was, according to a report in the Berlin Kurier on Saturday.
But they could not get a response, and eventually decided to break in the door in an attempt to find out what was going on in the flat.
?You could hear the noise out on the street,? one neighbour was quoted as saying.
When the officers smashed their way into the flat they found nothing more dangerous than the vibrator which was doing its best on the floor.
Now the young woman is not only going to have to face her neighbours when she returns home ? she will also have to pay for the smashed door, the paper said.
http://www.thelocal.de/society/20110423-34585.html
Just think. If she lived in the US she could sue the maker of the vibrator.
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ScriptOhio
Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.
Miss November:
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ScriptOhio
Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.
BIG BALLER BRAND CHALLENGE GAMES & THE BEST BALL FAMILY MOMENTS FROM FRIDAY’S PRESS CONFERENCE
Lithuania, are you ready for the Big Baller Brand Challenge Games? It’s only the biggest basketball event for the country since their national team won Bronze in the 1992 Olympics after the breakup of the Soviet Union!
Obviously I’m kidding and hoping I didn’t offend any fellow Arvydas Sabonis fans. And I have a Lithuanian last name (even though I’m not Lithuanian), so this should allow me a free pass to joke about the new home of LaMelo and LiAngelo Ball for the next few months.
On Friday, the two Ball brothers practiced for the first time with their Lithuanian team, Prienu Vytautas, and then participated in an amusing press conference, highlighted by a reporter asking Gelo out and if he has a girlfriend. His response was, “I’m just here to play basketball, no comment.” If you watch the ‘Ball in the Family‘ reality show on Facebook then you know he does in fact have a girlfriend and why he probably isn’t interested in leaving her. Then again, he has money and he was willing to…never mind.
Entire article: http://ballislife.com/big-baller-brand-challenge/
Ball in the Family =
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ScriptOhio
Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.
LiAngelo Ball, LaMelo Ball held scoreless in loss
In their second professional game, this one coming against improved competition in the Lithuanian league, the Ball brothers failed to score.
LiAngelo played nine minutes and LaMelo logged just five in Vytautas' 95-86 road loss at Lietkabelis.
The two brothers combined for 29 points in their debut Tuesday in a Big Baller Showcase game -- a five-game "friendly" series played against second-tier teams featuring exclusively teenagers.
Entire article: http://www.espn.com/nba/story/_/id/...lamelo-ball-fail-score-second-lithuanian-game
In their second professional game, this one coming against improved competition in the Lithuanian league, the Ball brothers failed to score.
LiAngelo played nine minutes and LaMelo logged just five in Vytautas' 95-86 road loss at Lietkabelis.
The two brothers combined for 29 points in their debut Tuesday in a Big Baller Showcase game -- a five-game "friendly" series played against second-tier teams featuring exclusively teenagers.
Entire article: http://www.espn.com/nba/story/_/id/...lamelo-ball-fail-score-second-lithuanian-game
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