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Reds tidbits 2016 (Sponge Bob Tight Canadian Pants)

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Oh well. The bullpen sucks. Doesn't matter because the Reds were losing by the time it was turned over to the pen anyway. One run isn't going to win many baseball games. One run will NEVER win a game that JJ Hoover pitches in. 2/3 an inning and 4 earned runs to get that ERA on the fast track to appearing on My 600 lb Life. It's up to 19.50 now. That fucking ERA needs to go down by 4 just so it can have the ERA reduction surgery performed on it's fat ass.
 
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CFPBuckeye said:
Oh well. The bullpen sucks. Doesn't matter because the Reds were losing by the time it was turned over to the pen anyway. One run isn't going to win many baseball games. One run will NEVER win a game that JJ Hoover pitches in. 2/3 an inning and 4 earned runs to get that ERA on the fast track to appearing on My 600 lb Life. It's up to 19.50 now. That fucking ERA needs to go down by 4 just so it can have the ERA reduction surgery performed on it's fat ass.
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He's like the morbidly obese fucker who eats too much at the picnic and has to spend the weekend starving in the garage before they can get him back in the fucking house.
 
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Some stats worth noting/laughing at on a Sunday morning:

  • Even after last nights 13-5 win, the Reds have the second worst run differential in baseball at -31
  • Brewers are leading at -40
  • 9-9 start has really hurt the chance to break the record. They project to a mere 90 loss team at this point (but I have faith).
  • Reds and Brewers, oddly enough, are tied for MLB lead with 108 runs allowed. This actually is sort of interesting in favor of our jizzbots in that they have played the Cubs a lot where as Brewers have been taking that kind of ass pounding from some of the lesser offensive teams (SF, Phi, Minn, StL, Hou)
  • Starters ERA as a team is at 4.40 which is only 19th in MLB. It is actually slightly better than SF who just paid the GDP of a small country for Cueto and Smarjwhateverthefuck.
  • Bullpen on the other hand, has allowed 56 runs as a team. SIXTEEN fucking runs more than the second worst bullpen performance in MLB (so far).
  • SIXgoddamnTEEN runs, in 18 games, more than second worst. White Sox are #1 with 9 RA. Our mongoloids have given up 56....in the NL...with no DH.
  • Bullpen ERA sits at a robust 6.72. Colorado is second worst at 5.46.
  • 1.26 ERA difference between them and guys who pitch in Coors field. :lol:
  • Fangraphs defensive WAR has Reds at -4 which ranks them 23rd in MLB. I don't pretend to know enough about defensive metrics to comment much more than a snicker here.
  • They are the worst,30th, in ErrR and 26th at UZR so if I'm reading that right they boot the ones right at them more than any other team in baseball but make up for it by not being able to range and get to many balls.
Players;
  • They are getting honest-to-god, positive offensive production from Cozart, Suarez, Duvall, Bruce, Barnhardt and Phillips at this point.
  • None of that will last but I'll play along and give Suarez the benefit of the doubt and say it could since he technically hasn't established a track record of Redness yet.
  • The rest of those mokes will crater.
  • Billy F Hamilton is in mid season form with a sub replacement level offensive contribution thus far
  • Gizmo is so fucked up he's worse than Hamilton right now. You have to do work to be more worthless than Billy Hamilton with a bat in your hand.
  • Cat Puncher is hurt/rusty/not that good. Take your pick. RZ keeps clinging to the dream of 2014, it's starting to look like the outlier and all the rest of the garbage time is the real Mesoraco.
All in all I am keeping the faith. 109 losses may not happen but they will be in the mix with the Brewers, Phillies and Braves for the #1 draft pick right down to the wire.
 
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With that effeminate capitulation to the tune of 9-0 yesterday they have taken over 1st place for worst run differential in all of MLB with a Betty Whiteian -40!!!

Wooot!

They are in NY tonight to take on the Mets and Noah Syndergaard.

U0RoVrm.gif
 
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Jaxbuck said:
Just got home...how in the living hell did these slack jawed queens score a run off Syndergaard?
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The only way you could probably imagine...

Hamilton reaches on an infield single (an infield single to second somehow,) steals third and comes home on a sac fly. That is then followed promptly by 2 more outs and the inning ends. That will be all of their runs, guaranteed.
 
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CFPBuckeye said:
The only way you could probably imagine...

Hamilton reaches on an infield single (an infield single to second somehow,) steals third and comes home on a sac fly. That is then followed promptly by 2 more outs and the inning ends. That will be all of their runs, guaranteed.
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Figured it had to be some sort of estrogen laden nonsense like that
 
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