Pants story

[DEBuckeye]

I have a theory, which says that almost everyone (especially anyone who's been to college) has a "pants story". A pants story is one that is either funny or embarassing, and pants- yours or someone else's- are a central part of the story.

I was at this party with a buddy while in college- I didn't know very many people, including the guys whose house we were in. After a few hours passed, we were suitably drunken, and I went to the bathroom to take a leak. Well, when I zipped up my jeans, the zipper broke and I was left with no way to close my fly. I tried to untuck my shirt and cover it- didn't work. I tried to find something in the bathroom to fasten it shut- didn't work. I was screwed. Then I thought maybe I could just get some new pants. I went into one of the bedrooms, closed the door, and started looking for a pair of jeans. After a few tries, I found a pair that fit, so I put them on and then folded mine up and put them in the drawer. Problem solved.

I had those jeans all the way through school- I still don't know whose they were....

 

[AKAK]

I have a theory, which says that almost everyone (especially anyone who's been to college) has a "pants story". A pants story is one that is either funny or embarassing, and pants- yours or someone else's- are a central part of the story.

I was at this party with a buddy while in college- I didn't know very many people, including the guys whose house we were in. After a few hours passed, we were suitably drunken, and I went to the bathroom to take a leak. Well, when I zipped up my jeans, the zipper broke and I was left with no way to close my fly. I tried to untuck my shirt and cover it- didn't work. I tried to find something in the bathroom to fasten it shut- didn't work. I was screwed. Then I thought maybe I could just get some new pants. I went into one of the bedrooms, closed the door, and started looking for a pair of jeans. After a few tries, I found a pair that fit, so I put them on and then folded mine up and put them in the drawer. Problem solved.

I had those jeans all the way through school- I still don't know whose they were....

My fly broke at a costume party once (that I showed up to completely obliterated) I said... well... fuck it.. and pretty much spent the rest of the party with my johnson hanging out... most of the night went like this.

Chick: "Hey, AKAK... you're..umm fly is down"

AKAK: "Zipper, Broke... thanks for checking, though, [AKAK winks, slyly]"

Chick: "These things happen I guess."

You'd be surprised how well nonegotistical exhibitionism like this works...

... and... it worked out well.

 

[jcfiesta]

Akak, why didn't you go rummaging thru another mans wardrobe and slap on a pair of his pants? Where is Thump?


I've never felt the insides of another mans pants, I think I'd let it hang or go home before snuggling into another dudes nut huggers.

 

[AKAK]

Akak, why didn't you go rummaging thru another mans wardrobe and slap on a pair of his pants? Where is Thump?


I've never felt the insides of another mans pants, I think I'd let it hang or go home before snuggling into another dudes nut huggers.

Because I'm not a Thief, Prude or Homo?

Nah... the real answer is... I was too drunk to care... of course I would never have to have done any of those things... as I was actually at my own residence, you see. I could have changed quite easily... HOWEVER... I would have wrecked my costume... and being the only person not in a costume at a costume party is much more conspicous than full frontal nudity... at least that was my thought process at the time.

 

[BuckBackHome]

The summer after undergrad I met up with a large number of high school classmates at a bar. I had been drinking so much that I did not notice I had caught the pocket of my shorts on the trigger/pull thing on a pinball machine. I kep walking and managed to rip a huge hole in the sides of my shorts. Two fortunate things. One, I had underwear on. Second, a friend caught it and let me know. I do not think that many people saw it. Because I was back home I just ran to my house and grabbed a spare. My friend who caught it was sober and was kind enough to drive me. That is what friend are for.

 

[Buckeyeskickbuttocks]

Pants story: I was wearing pants, this chick took them off of me and we fucked.


Actually, I did have one where I walked in to a meeting and gave a presentation with my fly down. People called me "Zippy" for months.

 

[AKAK]

Pants story: I was wearing pants, this chick took them off of me and we fucked.


Actually, I did have one where I walked in to a meeting and gave a presentation with my fly down. People called me "Zippy" for months.

I guess Zippy is better than Tiny.

 

[FKAGobucks877]

I had a party once that was pretty cool. I woke up with some chick the next day, and she was hot. The only problem was, she had stolen a pair of my pants. I called her out on it, and she denied it, said she couldn't fit in my pants (which is true). Until reading DEB's post, I didn't believe her.

DEB, you owe me $50.

 

[BuckeyeNation27]

The summer after undergrad I met up with a large number of high school classmates at a bar. I had been drinking so much that I did not notice I had caught the pocket of my shorts on the trigger/pull thing on a pinball machine. I kep walking and managed to rip a huge hole in the sides of my shorts. Two fortunate things. One, I had underwear on. Second, a friend caught it and let me know. I do not think that many people saw it. Because I was back home I just ran to my house and grabbed a spare. My friend who caught it was sober and was kind enough to drive me. That is what friend are for.

Freudian?

 

[Steve19]

Pants story: I was wearing pants, this chick took them off of me and we fucked. Actually, I did have one where I walked in to a meeting and gave a presentation with my fly down. People called me "Zippy" for months.

I was once in a presentation in London to a very tough female CEO of a company during the days when computers were changing from 5.25" disks (floppies) to the 3.5" disks (stiffies). You have to understand that corporate Britain has little room for "humour" (spelled that way because "u" betta get yo' ass outa here if you try any of it).

Anyway, when this guy rose to present, he opened his folder but couldn't see the floppie he planned to insert in the computer. So, he lowered the folder to about crotch level, so he could see from the overhead projector light, and fumbled around a bit with the folder. It looked like he was fondling himself.

At that point he drops the folder and begins scratching around in his pockets but looks straight into the overhead projector light, which hurt his eyes so much he yelped and stepped back. He stepped on the cord to the overhead projector at that point and plunged the room into darkness.

At that point, he announced, "That's more like it. I was sure I came in here with a floppie but I guess we'll have to try it with a stiffie instead!" We learned later that the British apparently called both disks floppies.

We didn't make the sale. :)

 

[scarletandgrey]

I have a theory, which says that almost everyone (especially anyone who's been to college) has a "pants story". A pants story is one that is either funny or embarassing, and pants- yours or someone else's- are a central part of the story.

I was at this party with a buddy while in college- I didn't know very many people, including the guys whose house we were in. After a few hours passed, we were suitably drunken, and I went to the bathroom to take a leak. Well, when I zipped up my jeans, the zipper broke and I was left with no way to close my fly. I tried to untuck my shirt and cover it- didn't work. I tried to find something in the bathroom to fasten it shut- didn't work. I was screwed. Then I thought maybe I could just get some new pants. I went into one of the bedrooms, closed the door, and started looking for a pair of jeans. After a few tries, I found a pair that fit, so I put them on and then folded mine up and put them in the drawer. Problem solved.

I had those jeans all the way through school- I still don't know whose they were....

This is a true drunken story sure to be a classic. Thanks Winona Rider...

 

[doubleEbuck]

have you ever made the 'gamble'? (bet yourself on whether you expell gaseous odors or something may actually come out).

a buddy of mine was at our local bar we frequent quite often and decided to 'gamble'. well, he gambled, and he lost. he ran to the bathroom with his pants full of 'stuff', ripped off his underwear, threw it in the corner, and went about his business the rest of the night. classic.

 

[iambrutus]

I have a theory, which says that almost everyone (especially anyone who's been to college) has a "pants story". A pants story is one that is either funny or embarassing, and pants- yours or someone else's- are a central part of the story.

I was at this party with a buddy while in college- I didn't know very many people, including the guys whose house we were in. After a few hours passed, we were suitably drunken, and I went to the bathroom to take a leak. Well, when I zipped up my jeans, the zipper broke and I was left with no way to close my fly. I tried to untuck my shirt and cover it- didn't work. I tried to find something in the bathroom to fasten it shut- didn't work. I was screwed. Then I thought maybe I could just get some new pants. I went into one of the bedrooms, closed the door, and started looking for a pair of jeans. After a few tries, I found a pair that fit, so I put them on and then folded mine up and put them in the drawer. Problem solved.

I had those jeans all the way through school- I still don't know whose they were....

that's freak hilarious, but its still pretty HOMO

 

[scarletandgrey]

have you ever made the 'gamble'? (bet yourself on whether you expell gaseous odors or something may actually come out).

a buddy of mine was at our local bar we frequent quite often and decided to 'gamble'. well, he gambled, and he lost. he ran to the bathroom with his pants full of 'stuff', ripped off his underwear, threw it in the corner, and went about his business the rest of the night. classic.

This games a little to risky for me. I try to hold it in as long as possible if that don't work I have no problem blowing up the shitter at a "clean" bar.

 

[Deety]

At an amusement park in high school, my date's zipper broke on a roller coaster, and he was too embarrassed to tell me, so he walked a step ahead and kept going in circles to the right so he was angled away from me... It's a strategy in which success is somewhat limited by the fact that a huge number of people walk by FACING YOU. Finally a kindly little old lady stopped him and offered up a few safety pins.