• Follow us on Twitter @buckeyeplanet and @bp_recruiting, like us on Facebook! Enjoy a post or article, recommend it to others! BP is only as strong as its community, and we only promote by word of mouth, so share away!
  • Consider registering! Fewer and higher quality ads, no emails you don't want, access to all the forums, download game torrents, private messages, polls, Sportsbook, etc. Even if you just want to lurk, there are a lot of good reasons to register!

ND JOKES

Jump to latest Follow Reply
Sort by date Sort by votes
NOTREDAMECHIEF

NOTREDAMECHIEF

Legend
Q: WHAT DO YOU CALL 63 PEOPLE SITTING AROUND A TV WATCHING A
BCS BOWL??
A: THE FIGHTING IRISH

Q: HOW DO YOU KEEP THE FIGHTING IRISH OUT OF YOUR YARD?
A: PUT UP GOAL POSTS.

Q: WHERE DO YOU GO IN SB IN CASE OF A TORNADO ??
A: ND STADIUM- THEY NEVER HAVE A TOUCHDOWN THERE.

Q: WHAT DO YOU CALL A FIGHTING IRISH WITH A BCS BOWL RING ??
A: A THIEF.

To be continued............
 
ND Jokes:

The Offense
The Defense
The Special Teams
The Coach
The Fans


:lol:

Glad yo see you back, Chief. Hope life is treating you well (with the exception of the weekly kick to the head that comes with watching your team get smoked.)

Have a drink!
48785744_6944ef7177_m.jpg
 
Upvote 0
Q: How do you make Notre Dame cookies?

A: Put them in a big bowl and beat them for 3 hours.


Q: Why does Notre Dame want Hillary to be President?

A: They might finally win a bowl game within the next 4 years, like the last Clinton's first term.


Q: Why does the Notre Dame offense have to live in 9 shared houses or less?

A: They can't get 10 yards.


Q: What's Charlie Weis' favorite holiday song?

A: "I'll be home for Christmas"
 
Upvote 0
Laughter is the best cure for misery Chief :)

Here's a few more oldies but goldies for the most part ..

Q: What do the Fighting Irish and Marijuana have in common?
A: They both get smoked in a bowl.

 Q: What's the difference between the Notre Dame cheerleaders and the Titanic?
A: Only a couple thousand people went down on the titanic.

Q: What's the difference between the Notre Dame football team and a dollar bill?
A: You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.

Q: What do you get when a groundhog sees a Notre Dame fan?
A: Six more weeks of bad football.

Q: How is a Notre Dame Cheerleader like a bowling ball?
A: They get fingered, thrown in the gutter, and they come back for more.

Q: Why wasn't Jesus born in South Bend?
A: They couldn't find Three Wise Men or a Virgin.

Q: Why did O.J. hide in South Bend after killing his wife?
A: No one would ever think of looking for a football player there.
 
Upvote 0
NOTREDAMECHIEF;993931; said:
Q: WHAT DO YOU CALL A FIGHTING IRISH WITH A BCS BOWL RING ??
A: A THIEF.
Click to expand...

Bucklion;993962; said:
Q: How do you make Notre Dame cookies?

A: Put them in a big bowl and beat them for 3 hours.
Click to expand...

These are the two jokes used by the Ohio State guy about Michigan at the end of HBO's The Game documentary. The old 102-year-old Michigan fuck's two Ohio State jokes were "Who do you get an OSU grad off your porch? Pay him for the pizza" (how original you old crogitty fuck), and some other lame-assed joke. The old fuck should've painted his face blue, because his crooked-assed teeth were maize...

Fuck Michigan.
 
Upvote 0
A fellow walks into a bar, orders a drink, and asks the bartender if he'd like to hear a good Notre Dame joke.

"Listen buddy," he growled. "See those 2 big guys on your left? They were both linemen on the Notre Dame football team. And that huge fellow on your right was a world-class wrestler at Notre Dame. That guy in the corner was Notre Dame's all-time champion weight lifter. And I lettered in 3 sports at Notre Dame. Now, are you absolutely positive you want to go ahead and tell your joke here?"

"Nah, guess not," the man replied. "I wouldn't want to have to explain it 5 times."
 
Upvote 0
Q: WHY DOESN'T FT. WAYNE HAVE A DIV. 1 FOOTBAll team??
A: BECAUSE THEN ND WOULD WANT ONE.

Q: WHATS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN THE FIGHTING IRISH AND A DOLLAR
BILL??
A: YOU CAN GET 4 QUARTERS FOR A DOLLAR BILL.

Q: WHAT DO THE FIGHTING IRISH AND POSSUMS HAVE IN COMMON ?
A: BOTH PLAY DEAD AT HOME AND GET KILLED ON THE ROAD.

To be continued.....
 
Last edited:
Upvote 0
Jimmy Clausen's girlfriend went before a judge.

"Your honor, I'd like a restraining order against Jimmy. I'm afraid he's going to beat me." she said.

"Beat you? Has he abused you in the past?" the Judge asked.

"No, Your Honor he hasn't."

"Has he threatened you?" the Judge asked.

"No, your honor. He's just so frustrated about Notre Dame losing that I'm worried he's going to take it out on me." the girlfriend said, sobbing.

"Ah, I see." The Judge took out a piece of paper, scribbled on it briefly and handed it to the young lady. "Take this and wear it whenever you are with him".

The girlfriend frowned and said "But Your Honor, it just says "Open Receiver"...

"Yes," the judge smiled. "And we all know that Jimmy Clausen could never hit one to save his life."
 
Upvote 0
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top