cincibuck
You kids stay off my lawn!
"She turned me into a newt... I got better." Would that I had the magic of Monty Python to cure me. We now know that I don't have swine flu or strep throat, but whatever it was/is, it kicked my ass.
Here I am, within a stones throw of beautiful Heidelberg and I haven't felt up to moving beyond the barracks and the hospital. I quickly discovered that there is a bus service between here and Heidelberg, but it cuts off at 16:30 hours. (4:30 National Guard time, an old regualr Army slam on the Guard and Reserve)
A car, my kingdom for a car. Faced with wasting my time eating at Winger's and buying Kleenex at the Shopette, I set off this morning determined to get a rental car. Being a "retired" soldier has been a bitch. I get asked for my ID every place I go and when they see a blue card instead of a green one the Federalies go beserk. Today I've settled with the manager of the PX car rental unit and am about to drive off in a new Opel when he sees my ID and freezes.
Why? Does he think I might be Marx, come back to rouse the rabble? Blow myself up while shouting Allah Ackbar!?
None of it matters, he can't do business with me because of the tax man agreement between the US and Germany under the Status of Forces Agreement. He is kind enough to draw up a small map with three more rental dealerships and I'm off on a volksmarch -- linx, linx, linx, recht, linx -- about greater Heidelberg. One, two, three, four places turn me down. "Sorry, it's the weekend and we're booked. We run specials for the weekends and all the cars get taken."
In despair, nose running, and energy levels reaching critical I stumble into the Hauptbahnhof. I had found a company with cars to rent on the internet and they claimed to be near the bahnhof. I searched everywhere, inside, outside and a block in either direction and found no such bahnhof car rental. I returned to the Tourist Information shop and poured out my tale of woe. The frauline listened to me and evidently felt pity. "Where is this Germany that can't find a car for a tourist to rent?" She began to furiously dial up car rental places and after five I was ready to give up, but not the frauline. Six was the magic one. Someone had a car for me if only I would show up at her counter. It turned out to be a Mercedes dealer in a part of Heidelberg that is begining to succumb to Americanization -- the industrial park -- ah but that's a whole other story -- I got my car, a little Mercedes Diesel gojomobuggy. Oh Happy day!
I came back to the barracks -- now that I was armed with a car the gate Gestapo where even more curious as to just who the hell was this Lieutenant Colonel with the blue ID card -- they stopped well short of a strip search, but I can tell they don't trust me.
A bit of a power up and I grabbed my box of Kleenex and drove to Schwetsenzinger, about 10 kilks from the base. It's a chrming little town with a beautiful grand boulevard that leads to the Schloss (big ass house) lined with interesting stores, cafes, a micro brewry or two and home to the 2009 Spargelfest -- asparagus fest -- I even found a confectionary that made candy spargel. At last I was seeing the Germany I'd set out for.
Here I am, within a stones throw of beautiful Heidelberg and I haven't felt up to moving beyond the barracks and the hospital. I quickly discovered that there is a bus service between here and Heidelberg, but it cuts off at 16:30 hours. (4:30 National Guard time, an old regualr Army slam on the Guard and Reserve)
A car, my kingdom for a car. Faced with wasting my time eating at Winger's and buying Kleenex at the Shopette, I set off this morning determined to get a rental car. Being a "retired" soldier has been a bitch. I get asked for my ID every place I go and when they see a blue card instead of a green one the Federalies go beserk. Today I've settled with the manager of the PX car rental unit and am about to drive off in a new Opel when he sees my ID and freezes.
Why? Does he think I might be Marx, come back to rouse the rabble? Blow myself up while shouting Allah Ackbar!?
None of it matters, he can't do business with me because of the tax man agreement between the US and Germany under the Status of Forces Agreement. He is kind enough to draw up a small map with three more rental dealerships and I'm off on a volksmarch -- linx, linx, linx, recht, linx -- about greater Heidelberg. One, two, three, four places turn me down. "Sorry, it's the weekend and we're booked. We run specials for the weekends and all the cars get taken."
In despair, nose running, and energy levels reaching critical I stumble into the Hauptbahnhof. I had found a company with cars to rent on the internet and they claimed to be near the bahnhof. I searched everywhere, inside, outside and a block in either direction and found no such bahnhof car rental. I returned to the Tourist Information shop and poured out my tale of woe. The frauline listened to me and evidently felt pity. "Where is this Germany that can't find a car for a tourist to rent?" She began to furiously dial up car rental places and after five I was ready to give up, but not the frauline. Six was the magic one. Someone had a car for me if only I would show up at her counter. It turned out to be a Mercedes dealer in a part of Heidelberg that is begining to succumb to Americanization -- the industrial park -- ah but that's a whole other story -- I got my car, a little Mercedes Diesel gojomobuggy. Oh Happy day!
I came back to the barracks -- now that I was armed with a car the gate Gestapo where even more curious as to just who the hell was this Lieutenant Colonel with the blue ID card -- they stopped well short of a strip search, but I can tell they don't trust me.
A bit of a power up and I grabbed my box of Kleenex and drove to Schwetsenzinger, about 10 kilks from the base. It's a chrming little town with a beautiful grand boulevard that leads to the Schloss (big ass house) lined with interesting stores, cafes, a micro brewry or two and home to the 2009 Spargelfest -- asparagus fest -- I even found a confectionary that made candy spargel. At last I was seeing the Germany I'd set out for.
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