Pretty [censored]ing not so good. One of my long time attorney buddies killed himself Sunday and his funeral is today. So that is the focus of the day and of most of the morning work calls, trying to get folks to come to the wake on short notice. One of those years later Katrina death things - he lost his job, and his wife and kids moved to a different state because of the storm, and they never came back. So he missed his two kids desperately. Depression. I don't "get it", as I am not ever depressed. I more go from happy to angry - and then back to happy pretty quick after something bad happening. My buddy however, could not stop obsessing about every small failure, therefor he was never really able to get his stuff together for a come back. He kept saying "I can't come back from this." I kept having him over to grill something and would hand him a beer and tell him all the reasons things were going to be all right. He had no health insurance, but I hounded him until he went to Catholic Charities and saw a shrink a time or two. He quite taking the meds they gave him as it made him doped up. I kept telling him to try to get a new script, as you might have to go through a much of different ones to find one that worked. He put it (me) off for weeks - and then said he had it changed. I don't know if he really did - or was just tired of me badgering him about it.
So I found out Tuesday that he killed himself Sunday. It was a gorgeous day and the French Quarter Fest was happening. He loved the French Quarter. I was in Mississippi with my scout troop canoing, so I did not talk to him that day. Since then I have had some old friends from law school tell me he called them out of the blue last week and sort of told them his problems. Saying goodbye to folks I guess.
Been thinking what to tell his kids - one in college and one in high school. Still do not have a clue what to say. Sucks. If any of your friends are depressed, try to give them even more time than you do - even if doing so is aggravating or inconvenient because they won't listen to you. You never know what you might have done to prevent it, and that is something that will always stay with you.
