Headlines You Don't See Every Day (outside of Florida)

[Tomateaux Quinoa Gumbeaux]

 

[Jaxbuck]

They don’t just kill people for shit like that in Cambodia? Not even a severe caning?

 

[5 STAR U-G-A]

Alligator attacks and kills woman who was walking her dog in South Carolina

The incident comes less than a year after another woman was fatally attacked by an alligator in Beaufort County.

www.cbsnews.com

Very Florida headline in Hilton Head. I wonder if the gator wanted the dog and ended up attacking the owner instead.

 

[5 STAR U-G-A]

Mexico: Mayor marries alligator-like reptile who he calls 'princess girl'

Victor Hugo Sosa says during the wedding ceremony: "I accept responsibility because we love each other. That is what is important. You can't have a marriage without love... I yield to marriage with the princess girl."

news.sky.com

A mayor in Mexico has married a female alligator-like animal in a traditional ceremony which is believed to bring good fortune to his people.

Victor Hugo Sosa wed the caiman reptile called Alicia Adriana as he re-enacted an ancestral ritual.

Local lore, or tradition, calls the creature the "princess girl" and the mayor said the pair "loved each other".

Onlookers clapped and danced in San Pedro Huamelula, a town of indigenous Chontal people in Oaxaca state, southern Mexico, as they entered into holy matrimony.

Mr Sosa said during the ritual: "I accept responsibility because we love each other. That is what is important.

"You can't have a marriage without love... I yield to marriage with the princess girl."

He was pictured kissing the animal on the head.

Marriage between a man and a female caiman has taken place there for 230 years to commemorate the peace between the Chontal and Huave indigenous groups.

The mayor, representing the Chontal king, marries the reptile, symbolising a Huave princess girl, in a union of the two communities.

 

[Jaxbuck]

Mexico: Mayor marries alligator-like reptile who he calls 'princess girl'

Victor Hugo Sosa says during the wedding ceremony: "I accept responsibility because we love each other. That is what is important. You can't have a marriage without love... I yield to marriage with the princess girl."

news.sky.com

"You can't have a marriage without love" is true, but being able to put a muzzle on her sure as shit helps.

 

[Steve19]

The marriage will have some important limitations...

 

[Trevi]

I’ll bet she has some tail.

 

[BB73]

The marriage will have some important limitations...

I’m thinking a blow job is out of the question.

 

[Jaxbuck]

I’m thinking a blow job is out of the question.

Of course it is. They are married.

 

[BB73]

Of course it is. They are married.

I was setting it up for that comment.

 

[DubCoffman62]

Now this is insane, steals a forklift from Lowes, is going through a Home Depot parking lot, hits a car with a woman in int, chases her down with the forklift, killing her and steals her car

https://edition.cnn.com/2023/07/04/us/forklift-hit-and-run-maryland/index.html

 

[TDunk]

I’m thinking a blow job is out of the question.

Also a handy. Maybe she has a cloaca.

 

[Tomateaux Quinoa Gumbeaux]

Now this is insane, steals a forklift from Lowes, is going through a Home Depot parking lot, hits a car with a woman in int, chases her down with the forklift, killing her and steals her car

https://edition.cnn.com/2023/07/04/us/forklift-hit-and-run-maryland/index.html

He did it in his underwear too

 

[Tomateaux Quinoa Gumbeaux]

 

[ScriptOhio]

Wife sneaks into Italian hospital to have sex with her husband

A shocked nurse walked into the emergency room in Padua, in northern Italy's Veneto region, to find the woman romping half-naked with her partner on a hospital gurney.

www.dailymail.co.uk

Wife disguises herself as a doctor so she can sneak into Italian hospital ward and have sex with her husband​

An Italian wife stole a doctor's medical gown to sneak into a hospital ward so she could have sex with her husband.

A shocked nurse walked into the emergency room, in the northern city of Padua, to find the woman romping half-naked with her partner on a hospital gurney.

The pair carried out the intimate act despite being surrounded by several other patients in the hospital.
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Hospital medics said the woman - who was reportedly intoxicated - had even removed the cannula in her 31-year-old husband's hand so he could move more easily.
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In an attempt to reenter the premises, she stole a medic's white coat so she could slip into the restricted ER ward unchallenged.

The woman was arrested on July 12 and taken to a police station, where she was identified.

The fake doctor now faces charges of receiving stolen goods, the unauthorised practice of a profession and impersonation.