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BP Fantasy Baseball (2008-2024, Current Champion = MD Buckeye again)

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Getting beyond pissed at my punch-and-judy batters, who have the added joy of not being able to steal a damn base. Atlanta better not fuck around with Acuña beyond the player control point, but relying on a 20 year old - even a highly regarded one - doesn't have me dancing.
 
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I had a fucking draft, picked fucking players, watched these asseaters go out there for almost 2 weeks...and I lead in holds. Motherfucking goddamned fuckchicken bitchtwinkie cocknugget assbirdfeeder holds. That’s what I have to show for these nipplescratchers. Holds. Season is over after one week...but I’m the king of fucking holds.
 
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Jake said:
Getting beyond pissed at my punch-and-judy batters, who have the added joy of not being able to steal a damn base. Atlanta better not fuck around with Acuña beyond the player control point, but relying on a 20 year old - even a highly regarded one - doesn't have me dancing.
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He’s the next ARod. Apparently.
 
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Bucklion said:
I had a fucking draft, picked fucking players, watched these asseaters go out there for almost 2 weeks...and I lead in holds. Motherfucking goddamned fuckchicken bitchtwinkie cocknugget assbirdfeeder holds. That’s what I have to show for these nipplescratchers. Holds. Season is over after one week...but I’m the king of fucking holds.
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I started last season at 1-11 at the hands of @Jake. Just trade all of your players. That seems to work.
 
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Jake said:
Getting beyond pissed at my punch-and-judy batters, who have the added joy of not being able to steal a damn base. Atlanta better not fuck around with Acuña beyond the player control point, but relying on a 20 year old - even a highly regarded one - doesn't have me dancing.
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so we are going into Sunday with the whole thing pretty much still up in the air

that means my hitters will completely turtle (every last one of them) and one or more pitchers will get shelled

watch and see if I don't end up lucky to get 3 points
 
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Jaxbuck said:
so we are going into Sunday with the whole thing pretty much still up in the air

that means my hitters will completely turtle (every last one of them) and one or more pitchers will get shelled

watch and see if I don't end up lucky to get 3 points
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Just to rain on your parade...

I don’t see you not taking at least 5.
 
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CFPBuckeye said:
Just to rain on your parade...

I don’t see you not taking at least 5.
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Hitters have started 0/10 with a small village left on base, doing their part

here is my call:
  1. I go 0 for every offensive category except SB. That's 5.
  2. Ohtani gets worked like an asian sex slave and blows the WHIP category. Mark it 6.
  3. My fruits hold on to Saves and QS.
  4. 11-3 for opponent once the feminine hygiene products dust settles.
  5. watch
 
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