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Badgers will take your women

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kinch

kinch

Wash me
In New York, well at least where I live, Thursday is Trash Day. Recycling too.
I had no idea it would be badger day.
So I got up early, sleepwalking, to take out the trash and recycling, strategically hiding the various items I wished my girlfriend not to see, and a badger told me to stop, put the trash down, and walk away. He didn't so much say it as he insisted it. With his eyes.
A fucking badger.
Again, I live in NYC.
Of course I did what he asked (implied?). But I needed to know more. I confronted the badger.
"Why are you here?"
"For your women," he replied.
"Well that makes sense."
And I came back to bed and shoved an umbrella up my ass.
 
Taosman;1654851; said:
Stinkin' badgers! Always stealing our women(and garbage) and [censored]!
I'd drop a garbage can on 'em!
Click to expand...

I'm guessing you'd run while simultaneously shitting your pants...call it a hunch.

I'd snap the badgers neck and eat it's liver with a nice Chianti and some fava beans.
 
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kinch;1654775; said:
In New York, well at least where I live, Thursday is Trash Day. Recycling too.
I had no idea it would be badger day.
So I got up early, sleepwalking, to take out the trash and recycling, strategically hiding the various items I wished my girlfriend not to see, and a badger told me to stop, put the trash down, and walk away. He didn't so much say it as he insisted it. With his eyes.
A fucking badger.
Again, I live in NYC.
Of course I did what he asked (implied?). But I needed to know more. I confronted the badger.
"Why are you here?"
"For your women," he replied.
"Well that makes sense."
And I came back to bed and shoved an umbrella up my ass.
Click to expand...

Speaking as one of the aforementioned women, "We don't need no stinking badgers!"
 
Upvote 0
kinch;1654775; said:
In New York, well at least where I live, Thursday is Trash Day. Recycling too.
I had no idea it would be badger day.
So I got up early, sleepwalking, to take out the trash and recycling, strategically hiding the various items I wished my girlfriend not to see, and a badger told me to stop, put the trash down, and walk away. He didn't so much say it as he insisted it. With his eyes.
A [censored]ing badger.
Again, I live in NYC.
Of course I did what he asked (implied?). But I needed to know more. I confronted the badger.
"Why are you here?"
"For your women," he replied.
"Well that makes sense."
And I came back to bed and shoved an umbrella up my ass.
Click to expand...
So, kinch, how's the scenery in Jamaica?
 
Upvote 0
In New York, well at least where I live, Thursday is Trash Day. Recycling too.
I had no idea it would be badger day.
So I got up early, sleepwalking, to take out the trash and recycling, strategically hiding the various items I wished my girlfriend not to see, and a badger told me to stop, put the trash down, and walk away. He didn't so much say it as he insisted it. With his eyes.
A fucking badger.
Again, I live in NYC.
Of course I did what he asked (implied?). But I needed to know more. I confronted the badger.
"Why are you here?"
"For your women," he replied.
"Well that makes sense."
And I came back to bed and shoved an umbrella up my ass.
Click to expand...

Remember kids, the label says to only use oven cleaner in a well ventilated area for a reason.
 
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