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2023 tCun Shenanigans, Arguments, Cobras, Feckless Marmots, Fake Pandas, Dirty Cheaters

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BuckeyesGunn said:
Jim Hairball: "I have a great idea, let's get a low level staffer to do the cheating for us. They'll never find out! Here kid, use my credit card to get some tickets, and here's a few names, addresses and numbers!"
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"...better yet, let's hire a fucking Marine to do it! They are known for being stealthy and subtle!!"
 
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They are trying to pass this off as a "basically the same thing" case

uh......no, this goes far and beyond that.

1000011507.jpg
 
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Jaxbuck said:
If someone is so shit all stupid as to use their real name when involved in rule breaking, I'm going to guess they would double down and leave a trail around the expense of said stupidity.

It's like the criminals who get busted trying to get the deposit back on the rental vehicle they used in committing the crime.
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As much as I'd love to believe that, if the plausible deniability thing is what scUM is going to ride, then that means a couple things to me.

- Using a fake name implies further, premeditated cover up. In this case, looks better to call the guy a "rogue staffer" and claim that if there was a vast network, it would be better concealed.

- Fund the travel expenses under the table (cash) So this is where you'd check out the payment method. Debit card, credit card, find out who it's issued to. Then find payment sources from that. I.E. look for structured cash deposits of similar (static) amounts into said "rogue agents" personal bank account... assuming he used his own debit or credit card to purchase tickets. That would begin to tie things together on where funding might have come from, in contrast to, and sans, his salary.

It would look awfully suspicious for a guy to spend half his yearly salary on tickets and travel expenses from his personal account.
 
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Jaxbuck said:
"...better yet, let's hire a fucking Marine to do it! They are known for being stealthy and subtle!!"
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What happens when you lock a Marine in a room with an anvil?

He will either break it, lose it or get it pregnant.

Much love to the devil dogs but Captain Pornname is going to bring shame to the Corps...
 
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buckeyeintn said:
I strongly disagree with ending their season now. Why punish the poor players?
Fire Harbaugh. Fire the OC, who had to know what was going on. Fire the DC, who had to know what was going on. Fire the position coaches, who should have known what was going on. Then let those poor players lose every remaining game on their schedule.
Raze the stadium and salt the field.
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Because those poor players benefited the last 2 years.

Who do you leave if you start firing people? You end their season and fire everyone.
 
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brodybuck21 said:

MICHIGAN STAFFER CONNOR STALIONS REPORTEDLY PURCHASED TICKETS TO GAMES AT 11 DIFFERENT BIG TEN SCHOOLS OVER PAST THREE YEARS​

By Dan Hope on October 23, 2023 at 3:52 pm @dan_hope
Connor Stalions on the sideline at the 2022 Ohio State/Michigan game

Adam Cairns/Columbus Dispatch/USA TODAY NETWORK
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The NCAA may have its smoking gun in its investigation into Michigan’s alleged sign-stealing operation.
ESPN’s Pete Thamel and Mark Schlabach reported Monday that Connor Stalions, the Michigan staffer at the center of the NCAA’s investigation into prohibited in-person scouting by the Wolverines, purchased tickets in his own name for more than 30 games over the last three years at 11 different Big Ten schools.
Those tickets included tickets on both sides of the stadium – across from each bench – for this past Saturday’s Ohio State/Penn State game, though he did not use the tickets after he was suspended by Michigan on Friday, when he was publicly identified as the leader of Michigan’s sign-stealing operation in multiple media reports.
According to the ESPN report, the tickets purchased by Stalions – who is employed by Michigan as an analyst for the football program – were all for games that did not include Michigan but included at least one team that the Wolverines were playing later in the season.
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:boogie:
 
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Buckeneye said:
As much as I'd love to believe that, if the plausible deniability thing is what scUM is going to ride, then that means a couple things to me.

- Using a fake name implies further, premeditated cover up. In this case, looks better to call the guy a "rogue staffer" and claim that if there was a vast network, it would be better concealed.

- Fund the travel expenses under the table (cash) So this is where you'd check out the payment method. Debit card, credit card, find out who it's issued to. Then find payment sources from that. I.E. look for structured cash deposits of similar (static) amounts into said "rogue agents" personal bank account... assuming he used his own debit or credit card to purchase tickets. That would begin to tie things together on where funding might have come from, in contrast to, and sans, his salary.

It would look awfully suspicious for a guy to spend half his yearly salary on tickets and travel expenses from his personal account.
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Could be. I'm going with the whole "fewest assumptions is probably the right theory" thing.

If you suck so bad at cheating as to use your real name then there are very likely going to be some fun nuggets to discover when people starting actually looking...and they probably aren't going to have to look al that hard.

The evidence of trying to impregnate the anvil will be obvious to use the @Mike80 's example.
 
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Captain Buckeye said:
Because those poor players benefited the last 2 years.

Who do you leave if you start firing people? You end their season and fire everyone.
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You obviously missed the sarcasm on the "poor players." If you read what I said, I want those "poor players" to have to play every remaining game on their schedule AFTER EVERY ONE OF THEIR COACHES IS FIRED. In other words, I want them to have to play every remaining game and be embarrassed every week.
 
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