• New here? Register here now for access to all the forums, download game torrents, private messages, polls, Sportsbook, etc. Plus, stay connected and follow BP on Instagram @buckeyeplanet and Facebook.

The end is nigh...

Jump to latest Follow Reply
Sort by date Sort by votes
vrbryant

vrbryant

Ever thus to ____ers
Staff member
...for me at least. It seems the people at Kellogg's are trying to choke me to death with gargantuan raisins hidden cleverly under piles of bran flakes.

___
 
Last edited:
in an effort to have courageous conversation.......

i think the problem lies more in your putting pennies in your cereal than it does with the size of the raisins.....

try using some sugar instead of the pennies next time........
 
Last edited by a moderator:
Upvote 0
With apologies to M. Gaye and the California Raisins…


Ooh, I bet you're wondering how I knew
'bout you're plans to make me turn blue
with some giant raisin the size of four.
Just between us...
I like Post much more.
It took me by surprise I must say,
when I found it yesterday.
Don't you know that...

Chorus:
I heard it through the grapevine
You’re trying to off me while I dine.
Oh I heard it through the grapevine,
Oh and I'm just about to sue you blind.
Money, money… yeah.

Don't you know man; I'm too young to die?
Eatin' your giant raisins would be suicide.
Just one would end my life me thinks
'cause it could get caught in my larynx
I could have just bought Total or Quaker Oats
Keep those California Raisins from makin' me toast
Instead...

Chorus

People say you are just what you eat,
but if that were true I'd be a beer.
I can't help but wondering...
if I could fit this raisin in my ear?
Did you think I wouldn’t know?
Did you think I’d see it and not get sore?
Don't you know...

Chorus
 
Upvote 0
DiHard said:
in an effort to have courageous conversation.......

i think the problem lies more in your putting pennies in your cereal than it does with the size of the raisins.....

try using some sugar instead of the pennies next time........
Click to expand...

The penny was for perspective, ya dum-dum. Otherwise you wouldn't be able to tell how frighteningly massive the raisin was.

___
tibor75 said:
why don't you write a poem about it?
Click to expand...

'cause I hate poetry. I got rejected for the class I wrote that other one for. Go figure.
 
Last edited:
Upvote 0
Well done Boro. I would add points to your rep - if I did that sort of thing.
Click to expand...
Oh come on now... I only wrote it to catch tibor in rep points.

Would you have given rep points if I had worked in:

I would rather get hit by a bus...
than get a giant raisin lodged in my esophagus ?​

...because I think I could make that happen. :wink2:
 
Last edited:
Upvote 0
Holy crap!!! That's not a raisin, that's a frickin' prune!!! They were trying to blow out your o-ring!!!

Being a conspiracy theorist and an overall crackpot, I can't overlook the fact that Kellog's is based out of that state up north. I think they're trying to off Buckeye fans one at a time by slipping giant bowel-busting dried fruits into our breakfasts.
 
Upvote 0
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top