The Best Place To Hide Money: Conversation With A Burglar

[Big Papa]

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I had quite the interesting conversation this weekend with a person who happened to be a former burglar. It was great timing because I was wondering if something like the skid mark underwear for hiding money would really work. I also figured that if you wanted to know the best place to hide your money from a burglar, a former burglar was the person to ask.

 

[martinss01]

watch an episode of it takes a thief on the discovery channel.

http://www.tv.com/it-takes-a-thief-2005/show/34149/summary.html

their burgler, john, ALWAYS rips apart the kids room. part of his reasoning is to drive the point home that he was in their house, there was nothing they could do to stop him, and to destroy the feeling of safety they had for their child. the other reason is because people hide stuff in their kids room. i can remember 2 episodes in which he found jewelry and or money in the kids room.

second, i don't think any form of nastyness in a drawer would stop him. simply because he doesn't seem to really look at the items. he opens drawers and dumps them out. throws stuff across the room etc.

a properly bolted down safe and an activated alarm is your best bet.

 

[AJHawkfan]

a properly bolted down safe and an activated alarm is your best bet.

With all due respect, I believe my approach is the best..... If you don't have anything worth stealing, you don't have to worry about someone stealing your crap.

 

[NJ-Buckeye]

dogs are good

 

[BB73]

dogs are good

But you need the plastic gloves whenever you want to access the money.

 

[IronBuckI]

But you need the plastic gloves whenever you want to access the money.

 

[OSU_Buckguy]

skid mark underwear, eh? why not just put your money in a jar of poo. that would also be a good way to save money. it would stay in there until it is absolutely necessary.

 

[Dryden]

If you're serious about hiding a wad of bills, and only bills, I'd go with the old, reliable, false-bottom soup can or fake hardback book.

FWIW, I heard a tale that my grandfather wrapped his valuables in meat packing paper and put them in the back of the freezer.

 

[ScarletBlood31]

Wrap it in a sock, and then in another bag, in a shoebox with newspapers, and other random clutter items over it, with maybe a shirt or rag. Then stick that shoebox in the furthest back corner of your closet, on the highest shelf, underneath more boxes with a bunch of old clothes hanging around it. Then stick magazines/newspapers on top, inbetween, and next to the shoeboxes. Also throw an old sweatshirt/tshirt over the box to kind of conceal it, but without making it look obvious. Place similar looking boxes, clothes, and magazines all around it.


The more random and secluded, the better.

 

[IronBuckI]

Wrap it in a sock, and then in another bag, in a shoebox with newspapers, and other random clutter items over it, with maybe a shirt or rag. Then stick that shoebox in the furthest back corner of your closet, on the highest shelf, underneath more boxes with a bunch of old clothes hanging around it. Then stick magazines/newspapers on top, inbetween, and next to the shoeboxes. Also throw an old sweatshirt/tshirt over the box to kind of conceal it, but without making it look obvious. Place similar looking boxes, clothes, and magazines all around it.


The more random and secluded, the better.

That would just make it impossible for me to remember where I put it.

I believe that martinss01 and AJHawkfan have the two best solutions.

 

[methomps]

 

[Jagdaddy]

Just leave a big wad of cash out on an old dresser . . . attached by clear fishing line to a hair-trigger 12 gauge shotgun concealed in the dresser at testicle level.

 

[Big Papa]

That would do it....