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sharkonwheels
Auburn STILL fugging sucks! WAR CHICKEN!
jlb1705;1797290; said:
I'm sure his parents are proud, seeing how their investment in his education is panning out...
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Wow, that's really butchering the English language for the sake of forcing an acrostic into a paper.
The Governator's was much better.
The Governator's was much better.
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Dryden;1797309; said:
Agreed. It's still funny to me though because I'm not paying his tuition.
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ScriptOhio
Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.
A degree from LSU must not be worth too much...
Subject: Very funny mid term paper
Date: Sat, 10 May 2008 08:40:54 -0700
HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT
The following is an actual question given on a Louisiana State University chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so ?profound? that the professor shared it with colle agues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well:
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle?s Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is ompressed) or some va riant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely
assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are l eaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let?s look at the different religions that exist in the world today.
Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell.
Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can
expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle?s Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to ex pand
proportionately as souls are added. This gives two possibilities: 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct?...leaving
only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting ?Oh my God.?
THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.
Date: Sat, 10 May 2008 08:40:54 -0700
HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT
The following is an actual question given on a Louisiana State University chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so ?profound? that the professor shared it with colle agues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well:
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle?s Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is ompressed) or some va riant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely
assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are l eaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let?s look at the different religions that exist in the world today.
Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell.
Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can
expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle?s Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to ex pand
proportionately as souls are added. This gives two possibilities: 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct?...leaving
only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting ?Oh my God.?
THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.
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ScriptOhio;1797380; said:Subject: Very funny mid term paper
Date: Sat, 10 May 2008 08:40:54 -0700
HELL EXPLAINED BY CHEMISTRY STUDENT
The following is an actual question given on a Louisiana State University chemistry mid-term. The answer by one student was so ?profound? that the professor shared it with colle agues, via the Internet, which is, of course, why we now have the pleasure of enjoying it as well:
Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?
Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle?s Law (gas cools when it expands and heats when it is ompressed) or some va riant.
One student, however, wrote the following:
First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know the rate at which souls are moving into Hell and the rate at which they are leaving. I think that we can safely
assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are l eaving. As for how many souls are entering Hell, let?s look at the different religions that exist in the world today.
Most of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to Hell.
Since there is more than one of these religions and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all souls go to Hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can
expect the number of souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell because Boyle?s Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to ex pand
proportionately as souls are added. This gives two possibilities: 1. If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell, then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.
2. If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it?
If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year that, "It will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you," and take into account the fact that I slept with her last night, then number two must be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and has already frozen over. The corollary of this theory is that since Hell has frozen over, it follows that it is not accepting any more souls and is therefore, extinct?...leaving
only Heaven, thereby proving the existence of a divine being which explains why, last night, Teresa kept shouting ?Oh my God.?
THIS STUDENT RECEIVED AN A+.
I've seen that around the internet several times and it's still funny as shit, and the dude definitely deserved that A+...
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ScriptOhio
Everybody is somebody else's weirdo.
MililaniBuckeye;1797417; said:
I think it is actually a fake; however, it SHOULD be real as it is funnier than [censored].
http://www.snopes.com/college/exam/hell.asp
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scarletmike
Researching the Magic!
I hope the kid in the original post had a good prof who could recognize it and laugh his ass off at the creativity. I wonder what I could come up with tomorrow for the paper I have to write... 
Seriously though, if I can work in a good "Fuck Mi*h*g*n" I very well may do it once or twice. Or maybe GBYBMYMSOB...
Seriously though, if I can work in a good "Fuck Mi*h*g*n" I very well may do it once or twice. Or maybe GBYBMYMSOB...
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scott91575
Resident hater
MililaniBuckeye;1797417; said:
That one was around before the internet (well, at least before Al Gore brought it to the public).
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