BP Fantasy Baseball (2008-2024, Current Champion = MD Buckeye again)

[Jaxbuck]

I see Yoanass Moncada got the memo I cut him and launched a grand slam today.

 

[Bucklion]

Berrios is apparently Puerto Rican for “I will make sure you have 1 pitcher that doesn’t lick armadillo testicles”

 

[Jake]

My fucking bums can't make contact, which is probably just as well since they can't run either.

 

[Bucklion]

My fucking bums can't make contact, which is probably just as well since they can't run either.

My team is sporting a stellar .231 this week

 

[Jake]

My team is sporting a stellar .231 this week

I'd kill for that production.

I'm currently at .206, which is only slightly worse than the .208 my Mendoza boys put up in week one.

 

[CFPBuckeye]

I never realized that Alex Cobb sucked so hard. This guy isn’t worthy of a spot on the Reds roster.

 

[Jaxbuck]

I never realized that Alex Cobb sucked so hard. This guy isn’t worthy of a spot on the Reds roster.

He's not nearly expensive or injured enough

Sucking is just table stakes

 

[Jake]

Rizzo has 2 hits today, bumping his average up to .152 for the season.

 

[Jaxbuck]

Jameson Taillon is currently being gang raped on the mound in Philadelphia.

Right out there in front of everyone. He's completely defenseless.

Somebody call for help

 

[CFPBuckeye]

Jameson Taillon is currently being gang raped on the mound in Philadelphia.

Right out there in front of everyone. He's completely defenseless.

Somebody call for help

Only lasted 1.2 innings. Must’ve had one of these.

 

[OHSportsFan]

Jameson Taillon is currently being gang raped on the mound in Philadelphia.

Right out there in front of everyone. He's completely defenseless.

Somebody call for help

Only lasted 1.2 innings. Must’ve had one of these.

Listen, you send a man with one testicle up on a mound and the boys of summer are gonna get a little curious with how far they can go.

 

[OHSportsFan]

Jameson Taillon treated for suspected testicular cancer

“Today I lost a piece of my ‘manhood.’ But today I’m feeling like more of a man than I ever have,” Taillon wrote in a heartfelt yet humorous statement he posted on his Twitter account. “My journey hasn’t been the smoothest. But it is my journey, and I wouldn’t change it for anything.”

Safe to say he lost the other piece tonight?

 

[CFPBuckeye]

Listen, you send a man with one testicle up on a mound and the boys of summer are gonna get a little curious with how far they can go.

Ball deep

 

[Jaxbuck]

Jameson Taillon treated for suspected testicular cancer


Safe to say he lost the other piece tonight?

They felt bad about him losing a part of his manhood so they gave him part of theirs.

A lot

 

[Smudger]

At least your lads play. If there was a minimum AB limit I’d be butt-plunged every week at the rate these clowns take one on the hands, slip on the dugout steps & complain about back ‘tightness’. Softer than Charmin this lot.