Taosman
Your Cousin In New Mexxico
A de facto orphan of war
Taos Pueblo child?s parents serving in Iraq
By Kevin Shank
The Taos News
Amara Mealing will turn 4 years old on Dec. 9, yet another milestone in her young life that family mem-bers fear her mother won?t be able to celebrate with her.
Amara lives at Taos Pueblo in the loving care of her great uncle and aunt, Paul and Alma Concha, who succeed in providing her a normal life full of family, fun, health and happiness.
Yet, they watch over the happy, playful girl amid the uncertainties of war half a world away.
Amara?s mother, Bernadette Lewis, and stepfather, Gerald Lewis, are deployed to Iraq with the Army?s 4th Infantry, which is stationed at Ft. Hood, Texas.
Amara?s father, Deon Mealing Jr., also serves in Iraq with the 4th Infantry.
All three soldiers are sergeants fighting in combat situations involv-ing grave danger, on the front lines ?somewhere near Baghdad.? That is all the Conchas know.
? We know they are in combat zones, and members of their units are dying. We try not to think of it. The way I look at it is, no news is good news,? Paul Concha said last week.
Amara?s mother currently is serv-ing her third tour in Iraq. She first deployed three months after Amara was born. Simply put, Amara has lived two-thirds of her life away from her parents, making her a de facto orphan of war as her parents continue to miss major milestones in their daughter?s life.
Said Alma Concha, ?Her mom missed her first teeth. She missed her first steps, her first words. Her mom missed her first birthday. She had her for her second birthday, but we had her for her third and we will have her for her fourth.?
Paul added with a wink to Amara, ?She even missed her riding her first two-wheeled bike!?
The Conchas cling to a mighty hope that Amara can spend the holidays with her mother, whose current deployment may conclude sometime in November.
But career fighting units like that of Amara?s parents, have often had their tours extended, and while hopeful, the Conchas are realistic ? happy to have every day they can with Amara.
The family already experienced one tragedy of this war: Alma Concha?s brother, Staff Sgt. Steven Bayo, was killed Feb. 4, 2005, while fighting in Iraq with the 7th Infantry, 2nd Battalion. He was 42 years old.
The Conchas said the sting of even temporary separation from Amara was nearly as bad as losing their loved one forever. They described heartwrenching sorrow at having to give Amara back to her mom after her first 15-month deployment, an experience Alma equated to losing a child of her own. They relived that experience a second time, and don?t relish having to do it again.
?This is the longest we?ve had her, so I don?t know how it?s going to be giving her back,? Alma said.
The Conchas keep Amara?s par-ents updated on how she grows, sending photos by e-mail when they can. Last week when interviewed, Paul had just sent off 13 new images of Amara, who has lately been enjoy-ing a new sandbox with her cousin, Raymond Paul Wilson Jr., an equally active, camera-friendly 3-year-old the family calls ?Junior.?
Amara and Junior are so close in age, ?they think they are brother and sister,? Alma Concha said, noting both began attending Taos Pueblo Head Start this year.
The Conchas said Amara talks to her parents periodically by phone, when they are able to call from their base in Iraq.
?The phone system is not great, but they call when they?re not busy. We get e-mails now and then. Her dad called a month ago, and her mom called in late August. Even when they do call the conversa-tion is less than five minutes long, because others are waiting to call home. And the phone line is staticy,? Alma explained.
She said Amara understands that her parents are ?military,? but her guardians take care to shield her from the grown-up realities of the job they do.
? We?ve told her that her mom and dad are helping little boys and girls who don?t have mommies and daddies,? Alma said.
Amid her giggles, Amara said she looks forward to the next time spent with her mom.
?I want to go on the airplane. I?m going to take my little backpack that?s green and yellow,? she said.
Amara was asked what she tells her mom on those rare, special occa-sions when they talk on the phone.
Alma Concha helped the child answer: ?One thing she tells her mom is, ?Be safe and keep your head down.?? ?I hope they come home soon,? Alma added. ?And that they?re safe.
■ [email protected]
Megan Bowers
In the absence of her parents, Amara Mealing finds familial comfort in playing with her cousin, Raymond Paul Wilson Jr.
Taos Pueblo child?s parents serving in Iraq
By Kevin Shank
The Taos News
Amara Mealing will turn 4 years old on Dec. 9, yet another milestone in her young life that family mem-bers fear her mother won?t be able to celebrate with her.
Amara lives at Taos Pueblo in the loving care of her great uncle and aunt, Paul and Alma Concha, who succeed in providing her a normal life full of family, fun, health and happiness.
Yet, they watch over the happy, playful girl amid the uncertainties of war half a world away.
Amara?s mother, Bernadette Lewis, and stepfather, Gerald Lewis, are deployed to Iraq with the Army?s 4th Infantry, which is stationed at Ft. Hood, Texas.
Amara?s father, Deon Mealing Jr., also serves in Iraq with the 4th Infantry.
All three soldiers are sergeants fighting in combat situations involv-ing grave danger, on the front lines ?somewhere near Baghdad.? That is all the Conchas know.
? We know they are in combat zones, and members of their units are dying. We try not to think of it. The way I look at it is, no news is good news,? Paul Concha said last week.
Amara?s mother currently is serv-ing her third tour in Iraq. She first deployed three months after Amara was born. Simply put, Amara has lived two-thirds of her life away from her parents, making her a de facto orphan of war as her parents continue to miss major milestones in their daughter?s life.
Said Alma Concha, ?Her mom missed her first teeth. She missed her first steps, her first words. Her mom missed her first birthday. She had her for her second birthday, but we had her for her third and we will have her for her fourth.?
Paul added with a wink to Amara, ?She even missed her riding her first two-wheeled bike!?
The Conchas cling to a mighty hope that Amara can spend the holidays with her mother, whose current deployment may conclude sometime in November.
But career fighting units like that of Amara?s parents, have often had their tours extended, and while hopeful, the Conchas are realistic ? happy to have every day they can with Amara.
The family already experienced one tragedy of this war: Alma Concha?s brother, Staff Sgt. Steven Bayo, was killed Feb. 4, 2005, while fighting in Iraq with the 7th Infantry, 2nd Battalion. He was 42 years old.
The Conchas said the sting of even temporary separation from Amara was nearly as bad as losing their loved one forever. They described heartwrenching sorrow at having to give Amara back to her mom after her first 15-month deployment, an experience Alma equated to losing a child of her own. They relived that experience a second time, and don?t relish having to do it again.
?This is the longest we?ve had her, so I don?t know how it?s going to be giving her back,? Alma said.
The Conchas keep Amara?s par-ents updated on how she grows, sending photos by e-mail when they can. Last week when interviewed, Paul had just sent off 13 new images of Amara, who has lately been enjoy-ing a new sandbox with her cousin, Raymond Paul Wilson Jr., an equally active, camera-friendly 3-year-old the family calls ?Junior.?
Amara and Junior are so close in age, ?they think they are brother and sister,? Alma Concha said, noting both began attending Taos Pueblo Head Start this year.
The Conchas said Amara talks to her parents periodically by phone, when they are able to call from their base in Iraq.
?The phone system is not great, but they call when they?re not busy. We get e-mails now and then. Her dad called a month ago, and her mom called in late August. Even when they do call the conversa-tion is less than five minutes long, because others are waiting to call home. And the phone line is staticy,? Alma explained.
She said Amara understands that her parents are ?military,? but her guardians take care to shield her from the grown-up realities of the job they do.
? We?ve told her that her mom and dad are helping little boys and girls who don?t have mommies and daddies,? Alma said.
Amid her giggles, Amara said she looks forward to the next time spent with her mom.
?I want to go on the airplane. I?m going to take my little backpack that?s green and yellow,? she said.
Amara was asked what she tells her mom on those rare, special occa-sions when they talk on the phone.
Alma Concha helped the child answer: ?One thing she tells her mom is, ?Be safe and keep your head down.?? ?I hope they come home soon,? Alma added. ?And that they?re safe.
■ [email protected]
Megan Bowers
In the absence of her parents, Amara Mealing finds familial comfort in playing with her cousin, Raymond Paul Wilson Jr.
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