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Zurp said:
Besides, I don't want to be one of those old guys who creeps the strippers out every other night.
*Zurp 70 years later*

"Hey Crystal after this lap dance how about you come home and we can go to my basement and have popsicles?"

oldman_popsicle.jpg
 
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I think it's ok to have a bachelor party without strippers. The problems start when you're told that you can't, and you're so whipped that you obey.

My 'bachelor party' was just a few buddies and me- we went to a nice restaurant, had big-ass steaks, some great wine and scotch, smoked some good cigars, and then went to shoot pool and down a few beers.
 
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My brother's bachelor party was last weekend. His best man rented a limo for the night. That was pretty flippin' sweet, riding around drinking beers in a limo between strip clubs. And then, due to my other brother's smartness, the limo driver drove just the two of us back to the previous strip club. We decided that it would be hilarious to stop by White Castle while we still had the limo. So we started looking for a White Castle. And within 30 seconds, we found a White Castle. It was right next to the strip club.

The next morning, my brother said that the smell coming from his ass was the best part of the night. I disagreed - the fact that we got White Castle in a limo was the best part. My wife made fun of me, because we got to see about a bazillion boobies, and here I am bragging about White Castle. But here's the way I see it: I've seen boobs before, and I'll see boobs again. And don't get me wrong, because boobs are awesome. Boobs beat the peanuts right out of White Castle any day of the week and a couple extra times (just for fun) on Sunday. But I've been in a limo maybe twice my entire life, and I'll probably be in a limo some other time, but not very many more times in my life. How often are you in a limo with the chance to go to White Castle at the same time?

The stuff coming out of my brother's ass was just gross.
 
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If the dude is not allowed to do anything-like have strippers at his bachelor, he needs to re-evaluate his relationship, and hopefully start wearing some pants. If nobody wants strippers, that's cool, to each their own....at the last bachelor party we went to, we stopped at a sleazy strip club, but pulled the groom out after the skanks wanted an outrageous amount for his lap dance-he was to wasted and they were too ugly to make it worthwhile...
 
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As I mentioned in the Michael Wiley thread, there was one very interesting detail that Zurp left out! I saw boobies at the White Castle that we went to in between strip clubs! You know it's a good night when you're getting flashed while you're traveling from one strip club to another!!!

And yes, I had wrath-of-God gas the next day. It melted the wall paper off of the walls and burnt off Zurp's eyebrows.
 
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