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ArtilleryBuck

Hall of Fame
Damn...I now have it bad.
Here's the deal...
I went out for a walk on this trail that goes around the apartments where I live. For the most part, it's a good trail except for the low-hanging trees everywhere and the relatively poor lighting. It was extremely humid, as monsoon season is still trying to finish up and I began sweating pretty much from the start. After I had been walking for about 2 miles or so, I came around a bend in the path and felt something up in my hair. It felt almost like a wasp or some other flying creature so I carefully began trying to shoo it off without actually making contact. Well, I did this successfully as I could now catch a glimpse of something pretty big and dark on the back of my shirt while looking over my shoulder. Next, I began trying to shake the back of my shirt, hoping that whatever it was would either fly off or fall off. Well, I could no longer see it when looking over my shoulder, so I finished up my walk and headed back to my apartment building. When I got to my parking lot, the damn thing began crawling up the back of my neck towards my ear. It was at that time I realized it was a spider as I felt a web trail as it moved...and it wasn't a little one either. Again I tried to sweep it off away from my skin, but the damn spider's web was too strong so he came off of my neck but rappelled back to the front of my shirt. This was my first true visual of the creature, and he was pretty damn intimidating...hairy and all. Of course, my next instinct was to lean forward to bring my sweaty shirt away from my body so that the MFer couldn't bite me through my shirt. Then, I flipped his ass as hard as I could off of my shirt. It looked like an apparent "mission accomplished" in the dim lighting of the parking lot. So, I get on the elevator and while going up to the 12th floor I began inspecting myself using the mirrors on the elevator. Nothing...good to go. I get inside my apartment and take off my sweaty shirt and feel cob webs all over as I took the shirt over my head. All of a sudden, the mother fucker is crawling up my bare back. I take my shirt and sling it over my shoulder, luckily I see him hit the ground where I pound him with my shoe repeatedly. I then carefully removed the rest of my clothes and stick them all into the washing machine immediately and hit the shower. I fuckin hate spiders!!!
 
Man, that would have totally freaked me the fuck out. You think white guys can't jump or dance? I'd have been jumping and dancing like crazy with that thing on me. I hate them, too. I hate all bugs, actually.
:yow1: :yow1: :yow1: :yow1: :yow1:
 
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I hate spiders too. As long as they stay out of the house I will not bother them. Once they are in the house they are fair game.

Glad to hear you did not scream like a little girl :biggrin:

I remember showering at a friend's crappy basement apartment years ago. He warned me right before I hopped in the shower that they were having problems with big spiders in their shower (He was serious.). I took possibly the fastest shower ever.
 
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DEBuckeye said:
I'd have been jumping and dancing like crazy with that thing on me.
There was one Korean lady watching me in the parking lot that probably thinks I'm crazy. :lol:
The one thing that pisses me off now that I think back is that on my way back to the parking lot, I intentionally passed this Korean man in hopes that if there was something still on my back he would say something to me. There is absolutely NO WAY he did not see that damn spider on my back...but he never said a word.
 
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There is only one reason I don't complete freak when I see a spider. My kids. I don't want them freaking, so I walk up calmly, with about half a roll of toilet paper in my hand, and crush the little bastards out of existance. I HATE every second of it.
 
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I dislike spiders but there's one thing I hate more...ants! We got quite an infestation in our kitchen and I see them crawling all over my food in the pantry :( If only my damn roomy would do the dishes/take out the trash once in awhile we wouldnt have to deal with this problem anymore...but I hate those f*in ants i swear
 
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Golferdow01 said:
I dislike spiders but there's one thing I hate more...ants!
Come on down south and experience some good ole Fire Ants...those little bastards hurt like hell and will swell you up. After a good rain, you can count on them being everywhere...

Oh, and I despise spiders....
 
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osugrad21 said:
Come on down south and experience some good ole Fire Ants...those little bastards hurt like hell and will swell you up. After a good rain, you can count on them being everywhere...

Oh, and I despise spiders....
Oh I know all about those. I have a friend who lives in Florence, SC and Ive been standing around donw there and look down and see hundreds of those pests crawling around my legs and I have to start doing the can-can to get them off...quite an annoyance
 
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So wait, your telling me that there are no Fire ants in Ohio!!! I thought they were everywhere. My worst spider story was having a Black widow crawl down my arm and into my cast. I am not afraid to admit that I was crying with fear. Eventually it came out the other side and I swatted it to the floor. Those things are the slimiest, most horrific looking creatures on the face of the earth.
 
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On one hand I can relate and on the other this makes me laugh.

I spent Saturday AM at my hunting camp clearing trails. I got out there early to try to beat the heat. As I walked through a few paths I encountered the same thing as Artillery Buck. The first one that gets caught up in your face freaks you out, especially in the early morning light or darkness. These are the big spiders with yellow markings that somehow manage to spread their webs across 10 and 12 foot trails. After each trail I would do a full body inspection to see if I was clean. In most cases I was not and had those things crawling all around my truck and up my legs and arms. Usually I would open the window and flick them off.

I worry more about the ticks and yes the fire ants.

The mosquitoes down here have been caring west nile virus. I use 100% DEET and they still try to get through for lunch.

Funny how little bugs cause so much terror.

Fire ants so far have not moved north of where there is a hard freeze. So far and you should count your blessings.
 
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coastalbuck said:
We got a good storm Friday afternoon. I've got a guy treating ant hills now, they are everywhere!! Except ball fields of course...
When I was in highschool our practice field would be covered with fire ants. Sometimes we would unknowingly start a drill on top of the mounds and coach would make us run the play and then we could move. Doesn't sound like much except for run the play was coach speak for, do this till im happy with the results. 2 or 3 mins in an ant mound is not fun.
 
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High Lonesome said:
When I was in highschool our practice field would be covered with fire ants. Sometimes we would unknowingly start a drill on top of the mounds and coach would make us run the play and then we could move. Doesn't sound like much except for run the play was coack speak for, do this till im happy with the results. 2 or 3 mins in an ant mound is not fun.
With as many downpours as we have in the past two weeks, even our ant treatment has been somewhat negated. When kids are stretching and suddenly realize they are being chewed up, they waste no time stripping down to their shorts to get them off.

Its comical, but I ve also seen kids with so many bites that they got nauseous...
 
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When I lived in Daytona Beach, they were everywhere. I was all of 6 yrs old when I had my first encouter with fire ants. That hurt like hell. I had about 15 bites on my legs.

Hey AB, been to Okinawa to see the spiders there yet?

bigbananaspider.jpg
Bananaspider2.jpg
 
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