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I think some of us have gotten by the Crusades and everything else. What if God is really the God of us all and not just a certain group. Ooops lost my mind there.
I see your point--a monkey is a beard all over. Perhaps you could have gone for the non beard beard. Shaved a beard onto the monkey. I'm no beard expert though.
I'm not either. But I don't share the good stories with strangers. I'm not really an outgoing guy with people I don't know or like. That's the benefit of getting to know me. People that have known me for a long time....they could tell some stories.