Recent content by Calvin Coolidge

Once a politician, always a politician: "To anger a conservative, lie to him." - Teddy Roosevelt

How dare you speak of Grace that way! But it's coming from the same mouth that got you challenged to a duel you'd have never won. You were so afraid of the Marquis de Morès that you arranged for his assassination. Rough and ready, indeed.

I was married to one for 28 years. Your first wife was so appalled at giving birth to your child that she died two days later out of shame.

Virtuous woman? My dear, the word you're looking for rhymes with trumpet and is hardly virtuous. It's no wonder that tarts bear your name.

He most certainly is not, like half of the other miscreants who desecrated the thread of former Presidents.

Egad, I've never seen such a ghastly woman. Happy new year to my fellow Presidents.

You lose.

*ahem*

Woodrow Wilson was a ghastly creature, whose shit stains were still in the bowl when I moved into the White House. Not even Warren Harding had managed to scrub them out.

Accurate depiction.

Coming from a slag who did the entire Continental Army, this can't possibly be a serious question. Besides, Ms. Lewinski could suck a golf ball through a garden hose. Dear Gracie does not possess such skills.

Your pardon is written and signed on my desk, so do to her as you will. @Dolly Madison thinks her 250 year old snatch is as sweet as those pies and cupcakes that bear her name, and deserving of her comeuppance.

Miss Lewinski, it's been some time. Gracie is off playing with that wretched raccoon again and has left me all alone. Care to soil another dress?

Ahhh, then perhaps you are ready to reconsider? Not in your wildest dreams Cal.

You'd think George would be more appreciative after you saved his painting during the burning of the White House. Well, you directed your slave to do it but still.