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Today's snowballers suck

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kinch

kinch

Wash me
If I were a kid today I would beat the crap out of today's kids in a snowball fight.

I was just walking home, and on the way I watched as some kids, maybe around 12 years old, had a snowball fight.

First of all, they threw like girls. They were boys. I guess this is a byproduct of playing video games all day instead of actually getting their asses out of the house.

Thinking about it, their asses seem to be the center of all their problems. I could see why they had a hard time dragging them out of the house. They were huge. When one kid ran away from another kid he didn’t so much run as “waddle.” Not only that, but the side-to-side turbulence of his enormous ass counteracted the only positive feature of said ass—holding his pants up. As the kid wore his pants down low around his ass the gyration shimmied his pants further downward until they were falling off.

It was lucky for the waddling kid that the kid chasing him threw like a girl. He survived this time.

If I were there, at a similar age, with my friends from back in the day, we would have pelted these fools into oblivion.

It’s a shame.
 
Hey, they're lucky their mom was around or I would have pelted their enormous asses now just to teach them a lesson.

I feel a little better knowing that at least the people on this board are probably raising kick ass ballers. :)
 
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Kinch,

I think it is time to set up Snowball Fighting 101 there in Alphabet City. You could charge an exorbitant amount of money for this class. The parents would battle it out just to enroll their little Xbox shits in what would be the new "in" thing.

101 would be "How to make and throw a snowball." You could end up with more classes such as the correct types of handwear for effective snowball throwing and how to make iceballs.
 
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Here in NE Ohio, you'd better make and throw good snowballs or your screwed.

I have spent several winters showing my sons the different techniques and strategies for making and throwing snowballs. I smile real big when I get a report of one of them throwing a snowball and some stinging pain being inflicted on the recipient.

Last week, one neighbor kid (he is really overweight) asked my one boy to not throw so hard. Not only did he refuse to, but he employed the "rapid-fire like Elf" technique I have used on him before. Brought a tear to my eye hearing him retell the story.
 
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I love the plan, but. . .

BuckinMichigan said:
I think it is time to set up Snowball Fighting 101 there in Alphabet City. You could charge an exorbitant amount of money for this class.and how to make iceballs.
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(Emphasis added)

Bwah ha ha!!!

The kids around here are from the Alphabet City of the past decade. As the Village wisdom goes:

* Avenue A, you're All right.
* Avenue B, you're Brave.
* Avenue C, you're Crazy.
* Avenue D, you're Dead

I live between C and D.

A: they have no money.
B: if they didn't like how a taught the class, they'd shoot me.

:)

Actually, it isn't really dangerous here now (but just don't walk down Avenue D still)

Otherwise, the plan is brilliant! :biggrin:

(btw - check out the movie "Rent"-- it is all about life in Alphabet City (which, for reference, is about 3-4 blocks by 13 blocks, not a city for anybody unfamiliar. . . it is between the above avenues A,B,C, & D, hence "Alphabet City," and is sorta stranded in the "butt" section of manhattan away from the busy middle. . .)
 
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buckiprof said:
Here in NE Ohio, you'd better make and throw good snowballs or your screwed.

I have spent several winters showing my sons the different techniques and strategies for making and throwing snowballs. I smile real big when I get a report of one of them throwing a snowball and some stinging pain being inflicted on the recipient.

Last week, one neighbor kid (he is really overweight) asked my one boy to not throw so hard. Not only did he refuse to, but he employed the "rapid-fire like Elf" technique I have used on him before. Brought a tear to my eye hearing him retell the story.
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Funniest damn thing I've read all day.

Way to represent!!

Bring your Ohio kids out here to show 'em how it's done. . .
 
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jwinslow said:
holy smokes batman, look who is still the unnecessary post nazi. Maybe you should give him more than a few min to catch the mistake probably created by internet problems.
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First of all its been 10 minutes. Second of all, the posts aren't exactly alike. In the first one he says "i just go out there and use my bare hands." and the second one he says "i do it the chuck norris-way and just use my bare hands." So no it wasn't an internet problem.

But whatever.
 
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tedginn05 said:
First of all its been 10 minutes. Second of all, the posts aren't exactly alike. In the first one he says "i just go out there and use my bare hands." and the second one he says "i do it the chuck norris-way and just use my bare hands." So no it wasn't an internet problem.

But whatever.
Click to expand...

Your posts may not be alike, but they are far too frequent.

Time for Teddy to go hang out with his high school friends.
 
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back before BP got a new server and the connection was really slow, it was common for people to have double posts (and gasp, sometimes people would slightly alter the post when they tried to send it in the next time). If this person was on a slow connection, it could sit there forever and ever and never seem to go thru... and that same scenario could come true. so yes, it could be an internet problem.

i seriously doubt he tried to post the same thing twice.
 
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jwinslow said:
back before BP got a new server and the connection was really slow, it was common for people to have double posts (and gasp, sometimes people would slightly alter the post when they tried to sent it in the next time). If this person was on a slow connection, it could sit there forever and ever and never seem to go thru... and that same scenario could come true. so yes, it could be an internet problem.

i seriously doubt he tried to post the same thing twice.
Click to expand...

Oh my apologies then.

Whatever happened to the "post-merging" system that was used before. Like if you posted 2 or more posts in a row in the same thread, they would be merged.

Was that here, or am I imagining things?
 
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