So the eldest kid in the house is a frosh in HS. When he was thinking of going to the homecoming dance one of his potential 'asks' was a girl who is one of his friends. They're really close, but at first she was a friend of a friend... his very first and longest term friend... they learned to walk together... families are very tight... the friend just happens to be a girl and his primary connection to his 'ask.'
So... he pings this first and longest friend and another young lady who makes up this gang of three young ladies for their thoughts on if they thought that his 'ask' might be interested in going to the dance with him.
Turns out, and I saw the text messages so I know it happened, both of them said, "No, I think that she just wants to be friends..."
He doesn't ask 'Ask'.
The 'Ask' was over at our house for New Years with her family and the family of the first and longest term friend. Ask's mom says to me, "So, the night of homecoming I drove the girls downtown. The girls told 'Ask' that he was interested in taking her to homecoming, but they told him that she'd not be interested... I looked in the mirror and saw Ask look down at the floor and say, 'I totally would have gone'."
Net net, two people that my son loves and trusts sold his ass down the river for their own best interests (they had the trip downtown planned for the three of them for a while).
Lesson learned... you can love and trust a lot of people, but if their interest is more important to them than your interest is to them, you may be played like a fiddle.
Tom, you may have just been played.