HUMOR -- Saw this - on old SportsPickle -- the last line kills me.
<TABLE class=contentpaneopen cellSpacing=1 cellPadding=0 width="100%" border=0><TBODY><TR><TD class=contentheading width="100%">Humor: NFL Dreads Drafting of 'Dickface' </TD></TR></TBODY></TABLE><TABLE class=contentpaneopen cellSpacing=1 cellPadding=0 width="100%" border=0><TBODY><TR><TD vAlign=top align=left width="70%">By DJ Gallo </TD><TD vAlign=top align=right></TD></TR><TR><TD vAlign=top colSpan=2></TD></TR><TR><TD vAlign=top colSpan=2>Friday, April 22, 2005
The following is rated 'P' for Parody.
(SPORTSPICKLE)-- Forced to deal with yet another controversy over personalized jerseys sold on its NFLShop.com site last week – this time for Michael Vick’s alias "Ron Mexico" – league officials are crossing their fingers that Ed Dickface, a linebacker for Texas State, will not be selected in this weekend’s NFL draft.
Dickface – projected as a mid to late round pick – could force the league to add yet another entry to its list of words and names banned from NFL-licensed jerseys, an increasingly common practice and something that has brought unwanted attention and embarrassment to the league in past months. In February, a controversy erupted when it was reported that the league did not allow the word "GAY" from its jerseys, even though an actual NFL player – Randall Gay of the Patriots – has the name. Then came removal of "MEXICO" last week when customers tried to order No. 7 Falcons jerseys personalized with the name Vick reportedly used as a pseudonym to get treated for genital herpes.
Now "DICKFACE" could be next.
"That Dickface could really muck things up for us again," said NFL spokesman Brian McCarthy. "As of now, DICKFACE isn’t one of our banned words, but it very well might be if he gets drafted. We can’t have thousands of people across the country walking around in NFL apparel with the word DICKFACE across the back. I don’t care if that’s his real name or not – it’s not a positive image for us to be projecting."
Most scouts think it’s almost a certainty that Dickface will be drafted and that the NFL will be forced to deal with the jersey implications.
"Hey, nobody wants a dickface on their team," said Kevin Colbert, the Steelers director of football operations. "But most everyone would want this Dickface on their team. He can really play. If he’s still available in the later rounds, we’ll gladly call his name and slap DICKFACE across the back of a Steelers jersey."
Dickface has dealt with jersey issues throughout his football career.
"Our team had player names on the back of jerseys for years," said Tom McGee, Dickface’s high school coach at Plains Park High in Omaha, Nebraska. "But when Ed made varsity his sophomore year, we ended the practice until he graduated. We’re in a pretty conservative area and a lot of people were offended by the thought of having DICKFACE on a jersey, even though that is his name. I think it might be Welsh."
Dickface said he just wants to play in the NFL, and won’t let his unusual surname cause a distraction. He even hopes to see his name and number retired by an NFL team some day.
"People have razzed me since I was a little kid because of my name," said Dickface. "It was always ‘Dickface’ this, and ‘Dickface’ that. Although, now that I think about it, maybe they weren’t making fun of me at all and were just calling me by my name. It’s hard to tell."
Dickface says he once considered changing his last name to his mother’s maiden name, but then decided against it.
"My mom’s name was ‘Fartsmith,’ and that’s probably no better than ‘Dickface,’" said Dickface.
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sandgk already found the official answer:kippy1040 said:
