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Man bribes cops with donuts


I've always liked them
JULY 14--Meet Michael Matakaetis. The 23-year-old Florida man was arrested last week after cops pulled him over for suspicion of drunk driving. Matakaetis, who had an open bottle of Captain Morgan Rum in his Lexus, apparently realized he was plastered and would be headed to the slammer. So, according to this Martin County Sheriff's report, Matakaetis decided to try and bribe his way out of the can. But instead of cash, Matakaetis actually offered the cop a stack of Dunkin' Donuts coupons. He noted, without irony, "You can have these if you just let me park the car and I'll walk home." If you're wondering where Mikey got that fistful of freebies, well, his pop is a doughnut impresario who's in the process of expanding his South Florida Dunkin' Donuts empire. Matakaetis's bribe offer was rebuffed and he was transported to the county jail, where he compounded his problems by telling the deputy, "You're gonna get a bullet...you should've let me go." Along with a misdemeanor DUI count, Matakaetis was also charged with a felony for threatening the cop. Released on $50,500 bail, Matakaetis faces an August 14 court hearing. (3 pages)