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Recruiting pitch at LSU: We will develop you into a Heisman winning QB, with legit NFL star WRs to throw to.
Recruiting pitch at Michigan: We'll copy from your high school's playbook to try and find something you're already good at, because we sure as shit don't know what we're doing.
Which one? The rare holding on a DT on a run play, or the blatant hold uncalled on the very next play? If these assholes ever face karma, it's going to be brutal.